I am legitimately so fucking sick of how normalized it is to sexually harass intersex people.

Look at this shit

The fucking like ratio. Why. Is it funny? Do people find it funny when we get sexually harassed? I've gotten this question a good 8 times.

This shit is so common

Perisex people find out we exist and they treat us like we only exist as sexual objects for them

It's so common that intersex teens online need to add disclaimers like this to their posts discussing being intersex, I've seen so many disclaimers similar to this on here as well as tik tok.

It just makes me so unbelievably sad that people do not respect us. They just don't. We're sexual objects or deformed freaks to most perisex people. It makes me so sad that we can't even talk about our lives online without being seen as walking fetish material.

And this happens irl as much as it happens online. In college settings, at queer bars, in queer spaces.

fucked up tbh

YOU FUCKING UNDERSTAND!!!!!

i do just want people to be aware that, while "assigned sex at birth" has been widely reclaimed and generalized to general populations, it did not start through personal identification or as a positive term. it was coined between doctors to discuss what sex to surgically and socially assign intersex infants, children, and in some cases, adults. one example of a study using this term is here, mostly inspired by john money [its a heavy read if you decide to open it]. i do just want people to be aware of the history of this term before claiming that it is "coined by the intersex community"—it wasnt, it was forced on us by the medical community.

what if it GETS her though 😥

Today I met happiness

Man what the fuck is it that makes people think intersex advocacy is transphobia

I was explaining how this art with trans colors would go better next to a personal essay that was made by a genderfluid intersex person than my own essay because they are trans and I am not and often intersex erasure is done via sliding us into some other category plus it erases the unique experiences of trans intersex people to conflate transness and intersexuality

And my classmate, who is trans, said "it's fine if you don't want to be associated with trans people" like girl. Ma'am. I gave you TV Glow on my ONLY flash drive and you never returned it. Everyone in my life is fucking trans! Do I fucking LOOK like I'm trying to not be associated with trans people? I'm asking people who know and respect me to know and respect my fucking identity.

My partner, who is both trans and Mexican, agrees that this shit is like "Hey I'm actually Cuban, and while I have experiences in common with and solidarity with Mexicans, I'd rather be associated with Cuban culture since I am Cuban. Maybe this person who is both Cuban and Mexican is a better fit to put by the Mexican flag art." And then having someone be like "its fine if you don't wanna be associated with Mexicans." Like. Is that what was said? Is that the energy being given?

That's what's happening here. I feel fucking insane every single day. The way it's happening irl and I'm literally just asking for people to remember I am intersex and not trans. Why is saying im not trans somehow me being fucking transphobic. Please explain. Why is forcing intersex people to overexplain again and again while we face the same violence as trans folks plus extra fun medical rape and whatnot somehow FINE to so many people? This person is a fucking tutor acting like this, too. Grow up

i really want to spell it out for perisex people:

my genitals do not work. there's as much poorly-healed scar tissue on my dick than regular skin. i can't piss properly or be aroused properly. i get completely random aches and pains and sometimes i piss blood for no diagnoseable reason. there is a decent chance every time i need treatment relating to my genitals that surgeons just turn me away because they don't know what to do with genitals like mine. the vast majority of people immediately find my body disgusting, my body is irreversibly ruined because of some cosmetic surgery i had before i was old enough to walk or talk.

after hearing that, do you expect me to give two fucking licks of a shit what my assigned sex is? if i was assigned female (no i'm not saying my assigned sex, it's nobody's business) would you tell me to my face that i can't identify as transfem because a doctor who hated me permanently injured me? are you fucking dense? let me just ask my rapist what my sexual orientation is while i'm at it since apparently the opinions of people who torture me matters more than what i think about myself.

if you are perisex, YOU DON'T GET IT! i don't care how much theory you've read or how many intersex people you've supposedly talked to, YOU DON'T GET IT. you don't get how assigned sex is coercive, you don't get intersex people's experiences, and you certainly don't get to tell intersex people how to feel.

If AGAB seems to cause conflict within the endosex trans community, it's because the term wasn't created specifically for that purpose. Too many people view it as a club they belong to rather than an axis of oppression where the evil is the assignment itself, not the existence of a gender. Nobody asked anybody if they wanted this to happen to them, and IGM/noncon HRT almost always comes with a heavy dose of other forms of abuse including SA, gaslighting, medical neglect in other aspects of life, etc. Consider not instinctively categorizing people by what they were within the community that's all about defying given categories.

Source

Source

JURY. NULLIFICATION.

Forever using this post as a reminder that Food Not Bombs has chapters all over the world. Check to see if your city has one and volunteer or donate.

I worked with my local chapter for community service learning at school and they really are amazing. Feeding people is important. You CAN help.

I have volunteered with FNB several times, and they DESPERATELY NEED HELP!! Some weeks they literally would not have been able to distrubute meals if it weren't for my partner being there to provide crucial help.

story time: i taught my little cousin her first longer word when she was very young. i taught her to say “tax benefits”. and to this day my aunt still doesn’t know where she got it from, but it was a hilarious sight to see a little toddler waddling around the house, wearing a big diaper, all the while yelling “TAX BENEFITS!!!!”

My parents did this with me and “nuclear disarmament”.

I taught my little brother to say “micro-surgical vasectomy reversal” (saw it on a billboard) on a road trip, and he didn’t stop saying it for literal years.

My parents taught me to chant “Get your laws off our bodies!” for a pro-choice rally when I was like four and I went to preschool and taught all the other kids the chant and led them on a mini-parade around the playground and the teachers were like ?????????? ?????????? ????????????

whenever my brother threw a tantrum as a baby my parents would chant “live free or die” until he calmed down it was fuckin weird

when i was a kid whenever we got stuck in traffic my dad would say “what the fuck?!?” in a very comic voice and i would repeat it and then he would say it with a slightly different inflection and i would repeat that too and so forth and so basically my poor mother would be stuck in standstill traffic listening to her husband and 4 yr old daughter swearing at each other without end

i’m a preschool teacher and we like to joke around using radical vocabulary with the children, the other day i overheard one kid say ‘this is my truck’ and the other one said ‘no, this truck belongs to the collective’; they all say it now

whenever anyone picks up my daughter or she goes upstairs, she announces “I ASCEND” it’s the best thing

In tears

My partner is perisex and trans, I am intersex and cis.

My partner is misgendered and has assumptions thrust upon them by everyone they meet. I am misgendered and have assumptions thrust upon me by everyone I meet.

My partner is seen as A Woman, despite not being A Woman. I am seen as A Man Pretending To Be A Woman, despite being A Woman.

My partner is forced to use the restroom that coordinates with their assigned gender. I am forced to use the restroom that coordinates with a gender I was never assigned and don't identify as.

My partner is treated as a Fellow Woman by women and is addressed with humanity by women. I am treated as an Imposter to Womanhood by women and am ignored while they address my partner instead of me.

My partner faces transphobia, but isn't usually in danger of physical assault by a stranger. I face intersexism, and I am in danger of physical assault by a stranger.

These are comparisons we've made together, things we've seen, things they've pointed out. The fact that they were nervous to follow me into the men's room, despite them being the trans one and me being the woman, emphasizes how different our experiences are, but with specific overlap.

I wish more intersex and trans people could share direct similarities and differences the way my partner and I can and do all the time. It gives so much weight to our shared struggle. It gives context.