@problemnyatic / problemnyatic.tumblr.com
a big thing about writing is that you can use it to subject girls to situations
[nilered voice] Unfortunately, the perpetual motion machine was still losing some energy, and at this point I really had no idea why.
[skips ahead in the video]
--finally, my live reaction to exceeding entropy.
[nilered caught on his camera's mic instead of being dubbed in post] oh, woah.
Oh, to be in the possession of someone who keeps you drugged up in a stupor, dotes on you, customises you to their whims, where you don't have to think and can just be a perfect doll for them
Remember this pokemon was designed for the movie first and the designer was so upset that they gave Lugia a "male" voice that he turned to drugs and alcohol. Because marketing took his motherly gaia figure and made him "cool guy pokemon." So heartbroken that it may have led to his death.
So yes, absolutely would. For Shudo.
it's time to find out how fucked the kingdom is
pick the one that's closest to you, or the one that's primary if you take multiple positions
okay this is good, the kingdom has more knights than it had last night, but those dragon numbers... those are a little scary my liege. won't be much of a castle left for us maids to keep clean if you don't manage to do anything about that your majesty...
good lord lmao
*trots over to you with a pinecone gift* do you wanna be friends…..
awoooooo!!!!! 🩶🩶🩶🩶
in case you're wondering what compels me to post like this, it's because I'm haunted by visions of the horrific knots I've seen others' brains tied up in in the past, unable to save or help them while they hurt themselves and everyone around them. I can't save them, but fuck, maybe if I shout into the void enough, I'll say the right words to save someone else. At least I can try to find the ones that'll save me in the process.
Also vyvanse is the Posting Demon and I need It to function. But mostly that first thing
It won't be all at once, but shit, you can't let it be never. Start small and keep at it. The change will come with time and continued effort. Don't give up.
Let's all unlearn the habit of pre-emptively talking shit about things when we first reveal that we're somehow involved with them to others. Not only is it another exercise of hitting yourself before anyone else can (thus only guaranteeing you get hit for it), but setting the tone of something is a powerful tool, don't waste it trying to suck-up to your imagined least-kind version of someone before they even get the chance to form or share their actual own opinion. You, too, have sway over how the room gets read, learn how to use it on purpose.
A lot of bad habits can actually be addressed by checking if you're seeking out the least kindness you can find and trying to please it before it can decide to hurt you.
You are better off seeking out more kindness and committing to treating yourself as someone who does not need to justify their existence or feelings any more than anyone else - let alone the meanest person in the room.
Stop living for the biggest jerk you can find and start living for yourself. And if you consider yourself to be that jerk, then stop!! Come up with kinder, more reasonable ideas and habits to live by instead. Forgive yourself and be patient with your limits and struggles. It's a lot of work and can feel stupid but it beats making yourself miserable forever just because it's familiar.
Let's all unlearn the habit of pre-emptively talking shit about things when we first reveal that we're somehow involved with them to others. Not only is it another exercise of hitting yourself before anyone else can (thus only guaranteeing you get hit for it), but setting the tone of something is a powerful tool, don't waste it trying to suck-up to your imagined least-kind version of someone before they even get the chance to form or share their actual own opinion. You, too, have sway over how the room gets read, learn how to use it on purpose.
If the people around you - friends, family, lovers, managers no one is exempt from this - make you feel like you need to perform shame or emotional distance to be given permission to share certain things, especially if those things are your interests or identity or creations, then you're being mistreated.
At worst, something may be inappropriate to share normally, in which case you can preface it with a matter-of-fact warning that need not pass a value judgement in doing so. But this habit of "playing it safe" by essentially signalling to others "don't worry, I also definitely hate this thing" before you even let them see what that thing is, let alone learn what their opinion of it is (if one even exists in the first place!!), it's self-defeating, and it clearly says to others "I expect you to hate this thing."
And like, seriously, who does this help? If nobody's heard of it, then their first impression will be you, naming it as condemnable before its actual name. If someone there actually likes it, then you'll hurt their feelings and demonstrate that they're also unsafe to engage with that thing around you, thus alienating someone from commonly-held ground you otherwise would have shared.
Unless this is genuinely something you're sharing because you hate (which is a nasty habit we all need to keep in strict check if you ask me), all you're doing is ensuring that you will need to *continue* performing this artificial shame.
Stop carrying the judgemental eye of bullies and abusers past with you. You do not need to do their work for them, especually not in their absence. You need not yourself recreate the expectations that hurt you before. Especially if you're with new people now. I know it's scary and exhausting to try again, but it is never too late to start over and start building habits and expectations of celebration and indifference rather than judgement and scorn.
And if it's your current community driving that expectation? Fuck 'em, they suck. That's a bad way to make people live, and you don't need to please them just because you wanted to think better of them. Sunk cost is a fallacy, and you're better off finding conflict in trying to change for the better than evading it by accepting the miserable expectations you're handed.
