Man: What’s a matter girl, you had a little bit too much corn?

Pig: *very long disgruntled groan which rises in pitch*

Man: Is that a yeah?

Pig: *shorter groan*

Man: Okay.  Here I come, I gotta get the intoxicated pig… Look at this pig…

Pig: *quiet snort*

Man: Hey!

Pig: *snort*

Man: Are you messed up, girl?  

Pig: *short snort*

Man: Never seen a damn pig… Look at that, that one here’s fine, that one there is fine, this one here is turned belly up 

Pig: *snort snort snort snort*

Man: Hey you

Pig: *snort*

Man: Whoa!  Whoa!  Shit!  [Unintelligible] HOWH!  Come here girl! 

Pig: *grunt grunt grunt*

Man: Holy hell, fuck…I didn’t mean to do that

“Whoa! Woah! Shit The Bed Almighty!” Is my new favorite expletive

and if anyone’s wondering, the man (from Cecilia, Kentucky, USA) had emptied a broken deer feeder full of accidentally fermented corn into a field where no animals were supposed to be. the pigs broke out of their pen, got into the corn, and the one you see here seriously overindulged

they observed her overnight and got Animal Control to do a check-up on her. she’s fine

so yes, you you can enjoy the video without worrying about Drunk Pig

source

So glad to hear she’s just drunk off her… whatever you call a pig ass. Haunches?

4chan memorial post. rest in hell

i regret nothing

MOOT / TAG GAME !

Tags @maybenotthebestnonhumanthere and anyone who wishes to join

I'm bored as hell so why not (his one was difficult, not many songs I like are in english)

R: Ruler of my heart / ruler of everything

E: Eleanor Rigby

N: Nowhere (man) (either works, beatles or alnst)

A: All my loving. beatles.

Lets do sua for good measure

S: Skies forever blue by itoki hana and toby fox

U: Unknown (till the end) by studio lico and AKUGETSU

A: All-In

T-T-TAGS WOOOO

I tag @alnst-willow (ha you have to come up with two songs with L)

Your so annoying but let's go

W- Would you fall in love with Me again [Epic the musical]

I- In the underworld now [Tales of the river styx hades and persephone]

L- Lost umbrella [Inaba Cumori or INABAKUMORI]

L- Lost in California [ DOYOUNG]

O- Over and over [Rio Romeo]

W- Weige [ Alnst- Vivinos- BL8M,6FU]

And let's do my real non preferred name because I have too many songs with the letter A

A- ARE WE STILL FRIENDS? [Tyler the creator]

I- Ikainaide (feat. Eve) [sohta,Eve]

M- Memories and Dreams [Steve Gabry]

E- End of beginning [Djo]

E- Escape [Destroy boys]

I have odd music taste anywhos @ivanisnotdead09

YAY YAY Tysm @alnst-willow oki doki

I - I like it [Enrique Iglesias and Pitbull]

V - Viva la Vida [Coldplay]

A - All the things she said [T.A.T.u.]

N - Napal Baji (lmao) [PSY]

in the actor au i saw a comic where Ivan's last name was 'Sunbae' so just let's add it :3

S - Sweet Dream [C!naH]

U - Unknown (Till the end) [AKUGETSU]

N - Never gonna give you up (haha you all got Rick-Rolled) [Rick Astley]

B - Blink Gone [BL8M]

A - All-in [6FU]

E - Everything I Do, I Do It For You [Bryan Adams]

I'll tag @bieru @sua-season50 and @nastyasmermaid if they want to do it ofc ^ ^

TYSM FOR THE TAG!!!!

N - Need To Know (Doja Cat) A - Alice By The Hudson (AJR) S - Search Party (NoLongerNull) T - Thetawaves (System of a Down) Y - Yandere (Jazmin Bean) A - Are you scared? I am not (IC3PEAK) S - Swansong (Ashbury Heights) M - Mutilator (Insane Clown Posse) E - ETERNAL TRIP (Satin Puppets) R - Rosé (Kim Dracula) M - Myspace Me (Aurelio Voltaire) A - A Feast for the Worms (Creature Feature) I - IF I DON'T COUNT TO SIX I'LL DIE (Banshee) D - Deal With It (Ashnikko)

TAGS: @vin-of-the-void @bergoop @thataintjackanymore @howtonerdoutovereverything @atrophicgalaxy @agoodpretender @avid-corvid @r3dnumb3rzzz @ajr-til-i-die

YAY TY FOR TAG :]

V - Vultures of North (Orbit Culture)

I - I, The Devourer (Synestia + Disembodied Tyrant)

N - Necromanteum (Carnifex)

O - Objects in Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear (Your Ghost In Glass)

F - Flying Whales (Gojira)

T - Tetrachromacy (King Gizzard & The Lizard Wizard)

H - Hammer Of The Witch (Ringworm)

E - Exhale (Methwitch)

V - Valhalla (Blind Guardian)

O - Overconfidence (Tallah)

I - Involuntary Doppelgänger (Archspire)

D - Dem Bones (Creature Feature)

Tags: @the-strange-creature @unsubtle-oddities @dogboyinuyasha @deadlyexhalation @meguchi512 and anyone else :]

thanks for tagging me :^D

M - My Last Breath (Evanescence)

E - Ego Brain (System of a Down)

G - Georgette Me, Georgette You (Ave Mujica)

U - Unravel (TK)

C - Cubicles (My Chemical Romance)

H - Honey, This Mirror Isn't Big Enough For The Two of Us (My Chemical Romance)

I - In The White (Katatonia)

tagging @robinoullea @danchkkk @mrstampede @half1spin @rose022 @thegalacticidiot @shortcakedoggie @ruikaa @nenerobopistol @star3synth @j11nko @coern @biocrafthero @freddy-owo @rockdrop @razzmothazz and anyone who wants to join B^)

Oooo this looks fun =00

F - fight like a girl (cheap perfume)

R - run the world!!! (dayglow)

E - everybody's falling in love (*repeat repeat)

D - die hard (art sorority)

D - dead girl walking reprise (heathers)

Y - you and I both (jason mraz)

O - odd2even (will connolly)

W - why do I feat. Hatsune miku (set it off)

O - on love, in sadness (jason mraz)

No pressure tags:

@stormflyblue @m00xissilly @fullfledgedghost and anyone else who wants to join ^^

gasp!!!! this is so cool!!!

s - snowman (rerec) - halyosy

t - teo - omoi

o - opera! space! opera! - wonderlands x showtime, nayutalien

r - rolling girl - wowaka

m - magical cure! love shot! - sawtowne

f - flyway - halyosy

l - la vaguelette - hoyo-mix, cécilia clara

y - YY - 23.exe

no pressure tags!!

@blazefirefox @kerizaret @universallyenthusiastvoid @amnesiamilk @space-brownie @m-b1z @galaxy-succulents @uncanniz

Ooh this is cool!! Ty for the tag <3

K - Koniec Lata - L.U.C. + Kwiat Jabłoni + others... from the movie "Chłopi"

E - Eight - Sleeping At Last

R - Role-Playing Game (RPG) - soramafuurasaka

I - Inertia - AJR

I dont rly. Feel like tagging anyone else rn so it's open game <3 maybe @adhdtsukasa if u wanna :)

thank you for the tag!!!!!! such a cool game even though i got cursed with having a name consisting of two repetitive letters

r - reincarnation apple, pinocchiop

i - integral, *luna

r - rozen horizon, roselia

i - it was a very beautiful june, eight

@aroacewxs no pressure tag for you!!! and also open for anyone who wants to join :D

k - kokoro nonsense - kairiki bear u - ultimate senpai - pinocchio-p t - tokyo teddy bear - neru e - envy baby - kanaria k - kitty - tsumiki i - i'm glad you're evil too - pinocchio-p t - terminal - nulut t - tokyo ghetto - eve y - (i genuinely could not find a song for this one)

@sploon-fic-fan or anyone else who wants to join

S - Sweet Cis Teen [Dazey and the Scouts] A - Alrighy Aphrodite [Peach Pit] P - PLAY DEAD! PLAY DEAD [Vylet Pony] H - Heaven in Your Head [Nuclear Daisies] I - Is It Really You? [Loathe] C - Cyan Hardcore [Machine Girl] I - I Am A Little Explosion [Self] D - Dance, Dance [FOB] A - aishiteitanoni [Maretu] L - Love [ICP]

Idk who to tag. :p

me when i find out a game has object physics

I said ooh girl

hey! donate to uk trans charities today because it’s gonna be a rough one

Folks in the UK, could we have some trusted links to charities?

There's Mermaids which is always a great option, and then Scotland-specific there's LGBT Youth Scotland, to give you just a couple. There will absolutely be more that other people can suggest though!

switchboard.lgbt and akt.org.uk are two i regularly support, and there’s always stonewall !

trans aid cymru is a mutual aid group rather than a charity but ill always shout them out for wales specific trans community support! they have a donation page here

Scottish Trans Alliance do good work, and more locally to me and also locally to the evil billionaire funding so much of this (we are deeply uneasy neighbours I live in constant fear of seeing her) and also Parliament, Resisting Transphobia in Edinburgh do a lot of community work. Resistance is everywhere, both national and local, official and grassroots, and if you have no money spare to donate then you can donate time, if you have neither you can - you Must - reach out to even just one trans person near you, because community starts with smiling at your neighbours, knowing names, noticing if they're struggling. I survived thanks to one queer person I never knew the name of and spoke barely one sentence to taking 10 minutes out of their day to drop off an LGBTQ youth centre flier for me back in 2016. It starts small. It moves mountains. We are not budging an inch. I love you.

day 1 at the communal puzzle club: i see a puzzle with a sign next to it that says "please help with our communal puzzle" and i say to myself "don't mind if I do" and did the whole thing

day 2 at the communal puzzle club: i get gently reprimanded for not sharing the puzzle experience with the others. in my defense I thought they needed all the help they could get

day 3 at the communal puzzle club: we start a new puzzle and i put one of the pieces in my pocket and save it for later so i can be the one who puts in the last piece

day 4 at the communal puzzle club: the puzzle is almost complete so i reach into my pocket and realize i left the last piece in my other pants which are currently in the washing machine. i feign ignorance

day 5 at the communal puzzle club: the others are suspicious but they have no proof. they check my pockets before i leave but little do they know that this time i ate the pieces

day 6 at the communal puzzle club: i put an entire bottle of miralax in my coffee to get the pieces out of my digestive system but they are too far dissolved to be usable. my stomach is in so much pain and i can't stop shitting but i rinse off what's left of the pieces and make it to puzzle club anyway, only to find out they don't meet on mondays. i am inconsolable.

day 7 at the communal puzzle club: i realized those pieces are incriminating evidence so i slipped them in someone else's pocket. i should be good as long as they don't find residual traces of my dna

day 8 at the communal puzzle club: there is an odd feeling in my gut. i feel as if something has been awoken in me

day 9 at the communal puzzle club: i am in such deep focus that the others are starting to fear me. either that or they are cowering away from the communal puzzle out of sheer respect for my skills

day 10 at the communal puzzle club: i'm getting better and better, i can now do several puzzles in one day. the others are discussing what to do about me in hushed tones. little do they know my laser focus allows me to hear everything they say. they aren't a threat.

day 11 at the communal puzzle club: the club manager unlocked the door but already i am inside. ive been here all night doing puzzles in the dark. they threaten to ban me from the club so in response i pick a 500 piece puzzle at random and complete it in under 45 minutes, just to show them who the real authority is

day 12 at the communal puzzle club: i have been officially banned from the communal puzzle club. in a fit of rage i grab as many pieces as i can and eat them, making sure to thoroughly chew and swallow every single one. if i can't do them, no one can.

day 13 at the communal puzzle club: it's monday again. the club doesn't meet today. it's the perfect opportunity to break in and do as many puzzles as my heart desires, without any of the club's petty drama to distract me

day 14 at the communal puzzle club: i am in jail because the club manager snitched to the cops like the pathetic weakling they are. this is the worst night of my entire life there aren't any puzzles here

day 15 at the communal puzzle club: the judge let me off with a restraining order since I didn't actually steal anything. i show back up to communal puzzle club just to make a show of ripping the order to shreds. no piece of paper will dictate my life, only jigsaw-cut cardboard has that power. nothing else.

day 16 at the communal puzzle club: everyone is so quiet today when I walk in. I eat some pieces in a show of force, just to remind everyone who's in charge. I comment that they taste somewhat like strychnine, they say it's just because Ravensburger has a new method of chemically processing their pieces. sounds plausible. 30 minutes later i am convulsing violently but i beg them not to call an ambulance until i finish the puzzle i was working on. but the bastards don't listen and I'm shipped off to the hospital kicking and screaming.

day 17 at the communal puzzle club: i spent the night in the hospital. a detective comes in and says they're investigating the manager of the communal puzzle club for attempted murder and asks what i know. i tell him honestly that i ain't no snitch and spit in his face. he says they have more than enough evidence to prosecute regardless.

day 18 at the communal puzzle club: the club manager is on trial for attempted murder and i am called as a witness. i tell the judge that i ain't no snitch and spit in his face. i am held in contempt of the court

day 19 at the communal puzzle club: the defense makes a plea of justifiable self defense, citing the restraining order that isn't even 1 week old. somehow the judge buys that flimsy defense. i mean, this is the same judge who didn't even recognize me from that same case despite being the same judge. i think the poor old man has dementia so i make a motion for a mistrial. it gets shot down because the system is corrupt.

day 20 at the communal puzzle club: the judge says i should get jail time but he decided i should be in a mental facility instead. i don't know why he would think that, i have been nothing but sane my entire life. god forbid a woman have hobbies

day 1 in the psych ward: they have puzzles in here this is amazing

day 2 in the psych ward: all the puzzles are missing a few pieces. this is unacceptable. im going to go insane

day 3 in the psych ward: i have been informed that they do not use the word "insane" in here so i take back my previous statement.

day 4 in the psych ward: i need to find those missing pieces i need to find them i need to find them i have been questioning everybody all the nurses all the doctors all the patients all the miscellaneous hospital staff but nobody knows anything. this is hopeless. i will never be able to overcome this trauma. my life is over

day 5 in the psych ward: it's so boring in here. without complete puzzles there's nothing to do except watch tv but the only channel they get is the local news. i begrudgingly watch out of nothing but all-encompassing ennui. but one of the stories is about the communal puzzle club and suddenly i am overcome with nostalgia. turns out there was a series of alleged poisonings attributed to that location. strychnine was found in three people so far, one of whom was myself. but the others didn't survive. this confirms my suspicion that i am in fact the chosen one

day 6 in the psych ward: with a renewed sense of purpose i will attempt to convince the doctors of my "sanity," but i also came to the realization that they don't care about sanity, they only care about sedation. they want to supress my passion, eradicate my truth, condition me to fall in line with the rest of the "sane" people. with that knowledge, i was able to tell them everything they wanted to hear. i acted polite, pretended i was cured, i even feigned complete disinterest in puzzles! it made my stomach boil but i did it, i convinced them, and just like that, i was free.

day 28 at the communal puzzle club: i don't know why everyone was so surprised to see me again, it's only natural that i'd come to finish what i started

(i know this is supposed to be day 27 at the communal puzzle club but day 27 was a monday so nothing happened) like what am i gonna say, "day 27 i sat alone in my studio apartment eating cereal and biding my time"

day 29 at the communal puzzle club: the communal puzzle club has been disbanded, the club manager has been arrested, and the whole place is swarming with cops. i watched as they hauled off a bunch of expensive looking printers and like a billion reams of paper and loaded them onto a big police truck.

apparently, the communal puzzle club was just a front for document forgery and counterfeit cash, and i had been inadvertently sabotaging them this entire time. which is sad because i support both of those things. but it also explains why they met 12 hours a day, 6 days a week and why they had their own building despite having no profit model and also why i was the only one who seemed to actually care about the puzzles. everyone else was too busy making fake passports to care.

in hindsight, i always knew they were all a bunch of casuals. but i didn't mind because they had so many excellent puzzles. I asked one of the officers if i could at least have the puzzles but he said they were already taken and locked away in the evidence room. the thought sickens me- all those puzzles, gathering dust, never to be assembled again. or maybe the pigs just took them for themselves! so they could have all the puzzles they want while the rest of us ordinary, law-abiding citizens have nothing to do except die of boredom!

the moral of the story is that we can never have nice things because of the fucking pigs. fuck the police.

the fuck did i just read?

my local library was having a puzzle swap and there was a puzzle with a sign next to it that said "please help with our communal puzzle" and i thought "wouldn't it be funny if i did the entire thing by myself" and then i did the entire thing by myself while rolling that thought around in my brain and as it rolled it started picking up all the various mold spores and fungus i keep up there. like a katamari

my mental state this past week

he’s so dreamy…

i made Vanessa Stockard's cat Kevin in spore [2008]. please look at her paintings of this thing

badly!

here's a gif of Spore Kevin doing the only dance that looks decent for him, and a gif of him shaking vigorously, just for fun. It was made from his walk cycle.

Let’s lay on mama

some of you need to realize that your faves would be having unsafe bdsm sex because they don’t actually know what bdsm sex is, they just want to fuck and also kill each other. you must understand this.

"diet plan" obviously the harpies are going to descend upon me and tear the flesh from my thigh as divine punishment, thus rendering me bleeding out and dying and also exactly at my goal weight. easy peasy

mine

a premonition