I'm weird, and I like bands.

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bwaaaah

bwaaaah

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Content warning: discussion of suicidal ideation.

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Define "all/some/none" in whatever way makes sense to you. Same thing for "friends"– generally, at least people you're somewhat close to.

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I do love the phrase executive dysfunction bc the image it conjures is of a bunch of people wearing business suits around a long oval conference table  arguing with each other to the point where they’re getting into physical fights, but in the background there’s just a big empty whiteboard with a To Do list with one item on it and that item is “take shower”

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fuck pumpkins

Scenario: it's your first time visiting the home of someone you're interested in (in any way– romantically, sexually, platonically, professionally, whatever). There is only one bathroom. While you're in there you have a few minutes to snoop around a little bit.

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hey girl awesome pussy. it looks like it was expensive

hey girl awesome pussy. it looks like a shining example of your country's functional healthcare system

[sweating and taking notes] hey girl awesome pussy. it looks nuanced and complicated

once you start saying shit like "yayy" "yippee" and "hehe" theres no going back