Link x Paya x Zelda shorts
Zelda: That shirt looks great, Link.
Link: Thanks.
Zelda: But I bet it would look even better on Paya's floor.
Paya: Are you hitting on Link... for me?
Paya: I didn't drink that much last night.
Link: You were flirting with Zelda.
Paya: So what? They're our girlfriend.
Link: You asked if they were single.
Link: And then you cried when they said they weren't.
Paya: looking through their clothes: Has anyone seen my top?
Link: Zelda's in the kitchen.
Paya: Yeah, being that pretty must be tiring.
Link: Then you must be exhuasted.
Zelda: Will you two shut up? Some of us are trying to grade student papers
Paya: Why do you let me win when we race up the stairs? You’re the faster one.
Link: Erm... it’s nice see your smile when you win!
Paya: They're probably just staring at my ass, aren't they.
Zelda: Yeah, probably. I do the same thing.
Zelda: Hi, sorry I’m late. I was doing a couple of things and got distracted.
Link: I’m “a couple of things”.
Paya: I’m “got distracted”.
Zelda: So, what is Link to you?
Paya: The reason I wake up every morning.
Zelda: ...That’s adorable.
Link earlier that morning, barging into Paya′s room, smacking pans together: WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP WAKE UP!!!
Link, bursting into the room: You two are having sex!
Zelda, not looking up from their book: Really? Paya, why didn’t you tell me? I would have put my book down.
Paya: I’m this close to falling in love with you and Link.
Zelda: Your fingertips are touching, and it’s “Link and you”
Zelda: Did Paya just tell me they loved me for the first time?
Zelda: And did I just do finger guns back?
Zelda: what did you do when she confessed to you?
Link: I offered her a cooked rock
Zelda: ...Did you steal my chapstick?
Zelda: My chapstick, Paya. Did you steal it?
Link: Zelda, for the love of God, not this again.
Paya: I- No, I didn't steal your chapstick. We use the same chapstick.
Zelda: No, there is absolutely no way we use the same chapstick, because it was only sold in castle town shop one hundred years ago and they discontinued it, and I loved it so much that I bought the last of their stock, and I keep it in my freezer so it doesn't go bad. It's been discontinued for 100 years. No one uses the same chapstick for 100 years. So unless you've been eating a whole fuck ton of something that's flavored like chocolate and popcorn, you absolutely stole my fucking chapstick.
Paya: Chocolate and popcorn?
Link: Why do you think it got discontinued?
Link in a talking head: it was me, I stole it. I thought it was candy, then Paya kissed me.
Link: How the hell did you crash the car?!
Paya: So I was just driving today, right? And my navigation told me to go straight.
Paya: I was like "woah, that's homophobic". Instead, I went gay. And, THAT'S when I got into an accident.
Zelda:, with a proud smile: And THAT'S one of the people I'm in love with, ladies and gentlemen.
Zelda: Fawning over Link isn’t a hobby.
Zelda: ....Thou shalt not marry each other, for thy art both sinful...
Link: I just want us to marry Paya!!
Zelda: I KNOW WE DO BUT WE CANT FIND A GOOD ENOUGH RING!
Link: Zelda I love you and I love our girlfriend and she will love any ring we give her!
Paya: It's pretty cold outside.. wanna hold hands? We should stay close.
Link: and you’re not cold
Zelda: holy hylia you are cold
Zelda: Link annoyed me today so I told them that I can’t wait to see what they have planned for our special day tomorrow.
Paya: There is nothing special about tomorrow.
Zelda: But there is something special about watching the color leave their face as panic takes over.
