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fiveteeth-deactivated20240408
HEY YALL MY FRIEND BUNNY MADE A UQUIZ ITS GREAT U SHOULD TAKE IT PLS<3
Reblogged night-dragon937
dear professor i cant seem to lock in. its so over
Reblogged aviesnapkindoodles
Funniest statistic from this General Conference by far
Reblogged enigmaris
In honor of General Conference coming up this weekend, as well as a recent uptick in new folks pokin’ around the tumblrstake tag to see what we’re about, may I humbly present my favorite Mormon joke of all time:
A doctor of psychology and long-time atheist decides he has a foolproof way to prove which church is true. So he calls in a Catholic priest, a Protestant pastor, and a Mormon bishop. He tells ‘em “I’ve got a psycho killer in here. Whichever of you can baptize him, I’ll join and endorse your church.”
The priest, while understandably shook, thinks he has this in the bag. All he has to do is run in, sprinkle the guy with water, and then book it. So he braces himself, douses his hands, and goes for it. No dice—the psycho killer is freakishly fast and pounces on him, snapping his neck.
The pastor’s got a harder job: he has to physically get the guy underwater. But lucky for him, he was a linebacker all through college, so he’s got a plan to play to his strengths. He’s gonna tackle the guy into the water, and then he wins. That part works fine, but then the psycho killer holds him down and drowns him.
The bishop’s been really quiet, thinking about how he’s gonna get out of this mess. After thinking real hard for a few minutes, he tells the professor he’s ready to go in.
The killer comes at him.
He pulls out a Glock.
Unloads four rounds into his chest and kills him instantly.
On his way out, he tells the professor, “Call me back in a year, and we’ll book some baptisms for the dead.”
Reblogged troubledsage
hey everyone its april fools. but dont worry i dont have anything planned. just going to sit here and...
I LIED !!!! GET PRANKED
POST BELOW ME GET FUCKING WET
Reblogged omgsomeonesomewhereonearth
It has arrived!
Reblogged optimisticabomination
Astronomers are the funniest people on earth actually
Reblogged rowan-ashtree
The art of seduction
English added by me :)
Reblogged night-dragon937
been doing a LOT of analog note-taking / journaling / planning lately (new years' resolution fulfilled! yes!), and I've slowly but surely started writing mostly in cursive again.
that said, I'm old (almost 35, ew) so I have questions.
if you want to RB this and put your age / locale / whatever else you think is relevant in the tags, that'd be very cool