mimic that has a diagetic red clickbait circle with arrows to get you to investigate it.

becoming a wizard lawyer and immediately getting a client who describes themself as "the bruce springsteen of nonbinary liches"

what the hell happened to attorney client confidentiality

you tried to pay me with one dusty old fake emerald

yeah. so anyway how’s the forgery case going? all good? all good things i hope?

i'm gonna be real with you it is looking extremely bad for you. the wizard council is probably gonna offer an extremely unfavorable plea deal and i advise you to take it

<|:^(

who doesn't love a ball toy pit?

ever wondered how many crabs might fit in a confined space? what number of horses might go into a padded pool? what quantity of paws might populate a pit typically filled with colorful plastic balls? well, you’re in luck.

for no reason at all, we have decided to make you do some math: we have filled a ball pit measuring exactly 32” x 8" with some true tumblr icons. more pics below (including, of course, a banana for scale). you have 24 hours to guess how many of each toy appears. good luck!

but that's not all—we have more polls for your guessing pleasure:

poll 1: how many crabs have infested the pool? poll 2: what number of mini horse friends? poll 3: how many tiny toe beans are contained within?

happy voting!

🦀 🐴 🐾 🦀 🐴 🐾

well folks, after 24 hours in the ball toy pit and a total of 219,643 total votes across the polls, it's time to find out who was right!

there were a total of 773 toys in the pit, making 30.1% of the 79,326 people who voted correct! as far as individual toys go, here's the breakdown:

crabs: 239 (19.6% of the 44,845 votes) horses: 299 (27.5% of the 45,270 votes) paws: 235 (27.7% of the 50,202 votes)

we had a blast looking through the notes at all your very complicated math—truly impressive!

🦀 🐴 🐾 🦀 🐴 🐾

prometheus: hot take,

the greek gods: no give that back

Ok, this house is weird. Firstly, I was wondering what was up w/the garage door.

Turns out it's a mirror. Built in 1955 in Palm Springs, CA, it's been remodeled and you must see the choices. 3bds, 3ba, 2,319 sq ft, $1,499,999.

Folks, folks. Hit the Keep reading button, you've got to see this floor.

Oh, okay. I see. You think this has nothing to do with you. You go to your closet and you select out, oh I don’t know, that gaslight gatekeep girlboss meme, for instance, because you’re trying to tell the world that you think modern feminism has been co-opted by corporations. But what you don’t know is that that meme is not from Instagram, it's not from Twitter, it's not from Tiktok, it’s actually from Tumblr. You’re also blithely unaware of the fact that in January 2021, Tumblr user missnumber1111 posted, "today's agenda: gaslight gatekeep and most importantly girlboss." And then I think it was a-m-e-t-h-y-s-t-r-o-s-e, wasn’t it, who reblogged it with an image of the phrase edited over a piece of "Live, Laugh, Love" wall art? And then gaslight gatekeep girlboss showed up in the feeds of eight different Twitter repost accounts. Then it filtered down through Instagram and then trickled on down into some tragic “alt side of Tiktok” where you, no doubt, fished it out of some clearance bin. However, that meme represents millions of notes and countless Tumblr users and so it’s sort of comical how you think that you’ve made a choice that exempts you from Tumblr when, in fact, you’re wearing the meme that was selected for you by the people in this room. From a pile of “stuff.”

just wanted to share the National Down Syndrome Society’s message for this year’s World Down Syndrome Day (21st March) 💛💙

Powerful message that lovingly includes multiple disabilities, united. I love this.

Gomez and Morticia Addams got divorced. I woke up mortified and with a sense of inexplicable dread.

you literally don’t need any other plot and i would watch the movie

This. All of this.

Wednesday offers to help with split custody of Pugsley. her suggestion involved a big table saw

there are two punchlines here, the first is predictable, the second really surprises you

I love when I see videos on other sites and they find they’re way to me naturally

Tumblr once again coming up with a feature I’m not gonna- hey whats going on back there

Philadelphians refilling the earths core with Cheez Whiz during the Great Cheez Whiz shortage of 1912

You can give yourself one genetic mutation and it is safe, effective, and cheap*. What are doing?

*i know that a lot of these aren’t just due to one gene but are a complex interplay of several genes, epigenetic factors, and environmental factors, but we are playing pretend here

Me:

March