Terry's daughter <3

Soooooooo jealous, but if anyone deserves them it’s her!

I believe this is from Blackadder (with a little GO change)

The angel knows what he's doing 😉

OMG this is so spot on 😁

hands

“When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.”

— Jodi Picoult, Handle with Care

You’re Allowed to Lose Interest—Even If You’ve Poured Time Into It

At some point, we all outgrow something we once loved. Maybe it’s a hobby, a community, a show, or a career path. You used to be all in—spending time, energy, maybe even money—but now? Not so much.

The problem is, we convince ourselves we have to stay interested because we’ve already put in so much effort. (I'm lookin' at you, knitting) That’s the sunk cost fallacy talking, and it’s a load of crap.

"Marie Kondo" Your Interests

Marie Kondo says to get rid of things that don’t spark joy. Great advice for cleaning out your junk drawer or closet (ratty old hoodies, you no longer spark joy), but even better advice for your time and energy. If something no longer excites you, you don’t have to keep forcing it. You’re not obligated to stay interested in something forever just because you once were.

Sunk Costs Are Sunk—Let Them Go

The sunk cost fallacy is that little asshole voice whispering, But I’ve already spent years on this. I can’t just quit now! Except, yes, you can. Just because you’ve put time or money into something doesn’t mean you owe it a lifetime commitment. The only thing that matters is whether it still adds value to your life now. If it doesn’t, cut your losses and move on.

And yeah, we’ve all heard “Nobody likes a quitter.” But let’s be honest- nobody likes a miserable, burned-out jackwagon clinging to something out of sheer stubbornness, either. Quitting isn’t failure. It’s just refusing to keep throwing good time after bad.

Stop Making Up Dramas to Fill the Void

Here’s another thing I’ve noticed: When a steady source of content or engagement dries up—whether it’s a creator going silent, a group fizzling out, or a passion just fading—people lose their gotdamm minds. Instead of accepting the quiet, they start making up stories. And not just any stories—escalating, over-the-top, apocalyptic stories.

Did they disappear because of a scandal? Was there a secret feud? Is something awful happening behind the scenes? MIND CONTROL??!

No. Sometimes, things just stop. People move on. Not everything needs a grand conspiracy behind it. But because silence makes us uncomfortable, we scramble to fill it—even if that means manufacturing a crisis.

You don’t have to do that. You don’t have to buy into it, either. If something fades away, let it. If someone stops posting or participating, maybe they just had other shit to do. It’s not always a mystery to solve.

You’re Allowed to Change

Interests aren’t life sentences. You can be obsessed with something for years and then wake up one day and realize you just… don’t care anymore. And that’s fine. You can always pick it back up later, or not (still lookin at you, knitting). Either way, you don’t owe anyone (including past you) an explanation.

So if something no longer excites you, don’t force it. Just move tf on. There’s something better waiting on the other side of that empty space.

Well said! 👏👏👏👏👏

After the Flood, Crowley drifts a while

Yall, today we learned this is the color. And that’s its real name.

How am I just now seeing this? 🤩

Listen, if a Bad President can come in and take away our rights and we're dependent on a Good President replacing them in four years to give us back our rights, then we do not have any rights.

If politicians can take or distribute them, then they're not "inalienable" and they're not "rights."

We don't have inalienable rights we have conditional privileges, divvied out according to the whims of whoever currently holds the reins.

And if we want to have actual rights, then we must build a system in which no one has the power to take them away to begin with.

THIS RIGHT HERE

As the late, great Molly Ivins said:

“It is possible to read the history of this country as one long struggle to extend the liberties established in our Constitution to everyone in America.”

Someone on Twitter just doxxed Michael and David's hotel location in Scotland (at least until people called them out in the replies and they went private). This, after Neil already violated their (especially David's) privacy during filming last time in a way that we now know the horrific details about. To then have a "fan" turn around and do it is beyond unconscionable. Between this and the incessant begging for hair dye photos, I would be insanely happy if this fandom could just BE NORMAL about these people for five goddamn minutes...

Why we can’t have nice things! 🤦🏻‍♀️

Two of Pentacles and Ace of Wands

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a symbolic Pair of Round Things must be in want of a symbolic Long Thing.

I would like to point out to fans of Michael and David that the series Staged is the very definition of Real People Fic. So the next time you attack or mock someone for being “an RPFer” or use it as a perjorative you might be a hypocrite?

Just some food for thought.

New S1 pics 👀

from :)

Disclaimer: This Ask from @sabinefromlyon was sent in several months ago, and I started writing my answer back then, but didn't have the chance to finish it until now.

I had previously written a post about the Neil situation the day the news first came out last year, but wanted to wait to say anything further until we had more information. So much of this is overwhelming--heartbreaking, infuriating, and unbelievable, all at once. As such, I really wanted to give this the careful consideration it merits, because every new detail that has emerged is somehow even worse than what came before.

In particular, there is a new article that was just published by Vulture (CW: Graphic descriptions of rape, sexual abuse, mental/emotional abuse, child abuse. More triggers are listed here, and please do not read if you feel it will be harmful to your mental health):

(There is also a non-paywalled version of the article here.)

I have a lot to say about the Vulture article, but I will address the initial query in this Ask first (and for anyone who has not read the Rolling Stone article, you can find it here).

In thinking about Neil blaming autism for his actions, I'm very much reminded of the kinds of things I have seen in my work in the area of autism and sexuality, where autistic adults--usually men, but sometimes also women--have challenges with reading social cues that end up having serious legal repercussions. Autistic people are overwhelmingly far more likely to be the victims of sexual assault than the perpetrators, but a lack of access to comprehensive and accurate sex education means that many people learn about relationships from movies, TV shows, or the Internet--none of which are optimal sources. Boundaries and consent are seldom if ever addressed, and stalking someone until they give in is something that is all but normalized.

What this can then lead to is things like autistic adults ending up on the sex offender registry or entangled in the criminal justice system, being incarcerated, and potentially inflicting much more trauma in the long run. It's something that I take incredibly seriously because I have seen the harm and pain it causes and how people who already face so much stigma in our society become even more isolated and ostracized as a result.

Which then brings me back to Neil and the Vulture article. Much was written in the article about his upbringing in Scientology--how Neil's parents were Scientologists, how he experienced abusive "discipline" at their hands via Scientology, and so on. All too often, there is a pattern of people who are abused going on to then abuse others, never having learned coping mechanisms or gotten much-needed therapy for these issues--which is something especially likely given that the cult of Scientology is notoriously anti-psychiatry/mental healthcare.

But there are also numerous victims of abuse who do not continue the cycle. All that this does--the information about Neil's autism and his history with Scientology--is provide a background. It gives us an idea of why Neil is who he is...but it does not justify what he has done. None of the above is an excuse for his predatory, despicable actions toward the women he has hurt. And what that then leaves us with is choices.

The choice to engage in clear and specific patterns of behavior over the course of several decades. The choice to blame a disability that millions of people are diagnosed with who would never think of harming anyone. The choice to know what it means to be a decent person, and to do the exact opposite instead.

The choices that Neil made, again and again.

When I read the Vulture article, it filled me with a visceral disgust, a sorrow for the soulless depths to which Neil sank, and for the unbearable pain his survivors have endured. I felt it through their words, through their stark, detailed descriptions of what happened, and the loneliness they felt in the aftermath. I also felt it in their bravery, in the courage that it took to come forward and share these traumatic experiences with the world, and I am so, so in awe of each and every one of them. I only wish that such shocking details weren't needed for them to be believed in the first place.

Another thing that reading the article stirred up was the memory of my own experiences with Neil, particularly this part:

In November of 2023, I met Neil at an event that was a tribute for Ray Bradbury, which I wrote about here on my blog at the time. A few years prior (2021 and 2022), I had several interactions with him on Twitter that were of a flirtatious nature, and which are also documented on here. While waiting in line at the event, I recounted the exchanges to someone I had struck up a conversation with, and their exact description of it was "gentle British flirting." But it's only now, after reading the above part of the article, that I realize Neil engineered it specifically to be that way. To come across as harmless to the point where I wasn't even sure if he was flirting.

When we spoke in person, Neil remembered me, and the exchanges on Twitter. He seemed very interested in the offer that I had made, yet still positioned himself as gentle, polite, British, never once giving the impression of impertinence.

It was insidious. It was purposeful. And the thought of it now makes my skin crawl.

The other facet of this was that I had a conversation with Neil about autism, and how one of the characters in the Bradbury story he read made me think of someone being the only autistic person in a family of neurotypicals. This was before I knew that Neil himself identified as autistic, and it was something he did not mention. Yet for as happy as I was about the conversation then, when I got an Ask in March of 2024 in response to Neil disclosing his diagnosis on Tumblr, I couldn't help but feel a sense of trepidation at how quickly so many fans attached their own sense of identity to him and elevated him to being a representative of the community. But I never could have had any idea of the extent of his actions and the depth of his depravity, nor could any of us could have known.

Neil willingly weaponized feminism, weaponized disability, weaponized allyship to the LGBTQ+ community to get away with what he did, and he purposely disguised it under a veil of gentle, British politeness to keep us all from finding out. Most sickeningly of all, he hid his true nature from so many people--his friends, his fans, the world at large--but had no problem exposing his own child to it. And all of this speaks to a cult of personality that seemed to start and form around Neil (in person, but especially on social media) long before these allegations ever came to light.

One of the hardest thing to reckon with about all this is that people do not walk around with signs on them declaring that they are abusive. People who hurt others are charming, sweet, relatable, funny--in short, all the things that will bring potential victims closer to them, rather than drive them away. Recognizing patterns of behavior in others is how we protect ourselves, but we need to be just as willing to recognize those patterns in people we like and admire as in people we dislike. And ignoring those patterns while also putting someone up on a pedestal--men, women, celebrities and non-celebrities alike--is a tremendously dangerous thing to do.

The only other thing I can say is that knowing what we all now know, nothing is more important than what these women went through. Their humanity, along with this man's blatant, feckless disregard for it, more than supersedes a fandom, or a TV show. Neil has betrayed these women, and he's betrayed his friends, his family, his fans, and everything he ever claimed to stand for in the worst possible way. He has proven himself morally bankrupt on an unimaginable scale. And the unending shame of that is and always will be his to bear.

To all of my followers and everyone out there: Please, please take care of yourselves. This is an extremely difficult, painful situation to navigate, but do know that you are not alone, and my Asks are open for anyone who wants or needs to talk.

I started this in July and gave up bcs background

I loves me some Cass Elliot!

I love Crowley's little, intentional brushes in greeting that would look accidental to anyone watching. 💘

When the yaoi so fire they have a memorializing plaque

THIS IS NOT ABOUT BBC SHERLOCK THIS IS NOT A BBC SHERLOCK POST THIS IS ABOUT ARTHUR CONAN DOYLE OLD MAN YAOI

Pride and Prejudice 1995 text posts, part 6 of ? - prev set

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