I'm the seal friend.

it sure is

Why are you lgbtq+? wrong answers only GO

there is no physical comedy funnier than the frantic skedaddle of a cat caught in the midst of mischief

Well obviously I can’t have chronic fatigue, that’s a real problem for real disabled people that’s diagnosed by doctors probably. Clearly I just have some sort of perpetual exhaustion issue, that is also almost certainly my fault somehow

(tags via @savefrog)

The Purge should have been a comedy

Being a young adult is so strange. You enter a coffee shop. The 20 year old girl waiting behind you cried all night because she just came to a new city for university and she feels so alone. That 27 year old guy over there works a job he is overqualified for, he lives with his parents and wants to move out but doesn't know what to do about it. That one 24 year old dude already has a car, a house, and a job waiting for him once he graduates thanks to his dad's connections. The 26 year old barista couldn't complete his higher education because he has to work and take care of his family. The 28 year old girl sitting next to you has no friends to go out with so she is texting her mother. That couple (both 25 years old) are married and the girl is pregnant. The 29 year old writing something on her laptop has realized that she chose the wrong major so she is trying to start all over. We are not alone in this, but we are actually so alone. Do you feel me

Don't leave this in the tags.

Write us a post, you're the piano blog

Write us a post tonight

Cause we're all in the mood for a memory

And you got us feeling...called the fuck out honestly

Well you see minors under 25 years old should not be allowed to get gender reassignment surgery because what if they go to the clinic but instead of giving them a normal penis the nurses mess up and give them the evil penis. That's irreversible

OP which clinics have evil penises

OP please

OP we need to know

OP please

As an alternative to 'sugar, spice, and everything nice'

I present: 'salt, vinegar, and everything sinister'

the template would later branch out to any negative word, but the original naming scheme for sith lords was darth + a negative word starting with 'in', with the front cut off. e.g. Darth (In)vader, Darth (In)sidious, etc. in a return to tradition, my star wars property centres the fearsome Darth Cestuous

Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Tolerance the Woke? I thought not. It's not a story the Jedi would tell you.

are you uncomfortable from your hands being dry? if you apply lotion, you can instead be uncomfortable with how greasy they are now. Subscribe for more tips!

also during the first round of 20 questions we got into a big argument bc when my brother & i play some of the first questions we ask are "is it a living thing" and if yes "is it humanoid in shape" & his gf refused to play along with the Humanoid In Shape concept. me & my brothers shared reasoning is that if you could take a stick figure and flesh it out into any given entity then its humanoid in shape even if its not a human. like kermit or perhaps an orc. my mom and my brothers gf are both not on board with this At All but my solution to the issue was that if youre playing 20 questions with somebody you just have to understand the personal set of morals that person is operating by and stoop to their level even if they cant accept that kermit is shaped like a man

This is the only condiment you can use for one whole year.

making an NSFW game about transfem robot cowboys (female) btw

Expect no news til it's done

this is an amazing concept and i look forward to it but also