sometimes the way humans use words actually makes me tear up a little

The first three words you see will manifest in 2025.

Lesbian nature adventure lets fucking go

Timeloop yuri adventure

Should I be worried or excited?

Revolution yuri maid

… 2025’s gonna be an interesting one

Timeloop yuri poly

...Dammit, I'm in for another sexuality crisis, aren't I

Polycule lesbian adventure

....Let's go?

Time portals adventure

…I don’t like where this is going

Apollo desperately trying to figure out what he can eat or do that would have a similar effect to persephone’s pomegranate just in case someone does something stupid like “save him”

Apollo eating everything Perse makes for him because a) she made it herself and food as a metaphor for love and b) her cooking is amazing and c) no lover had ever cooked for him before

Apollo asks Persephone for advice on how to get married/kidnapped.

Apollo also hisses at any gods stupid enough to try to save him. “If you save me, I will never forgive you.” - Apollo, probably.

Perse with Apollo: 😊😘🥰😍💙💍

Perse with gods trying to rescue her sunshine: 🤬🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️🗡️

Perseleia bonding with Hades as she carries out her psychopomp duties over how you kidnap your beloved to eternally entwine souls and suddenly “you’re the bad guy” 🙄

They have tea parties.

Demeter is not comprehending how Leto is not as concerned as she should be

Leto is just happy her son is finally married and she doesn’t have to hear one more yearning poem about sea green waters or playful foxes

"She asked my permission to kidnap him." Leto interrupted the Goddess of the Harvest. "Arranged to meet me for tea, sat down and made sure we were alone. Then she just smiled and asked for my permission to steal my son as her groom."

Demeter gaped. Leto couldn't blame her, she'd reacted the exact same way.

"She said she wanted my blessing because she didn't want me to worry when I heard about it." She said, her voice growing louder as she continued. "Because it's important to have a good relationship with your in-laws when possible."

"She even told me her entire plan for stealing him!" And she was still incredulous at that. Both that she'd been told the plan, and that the plan had worked perfectly.

Demeter finally blinked. "How did she manage it?" Doubtless the Olympian was imagining a chase, some sort of spar, trickery.

That would certainly make a better story than the truth. "She joined him on the sun chariot and waited until near the end of the day. Then she smiled at him and asked him if she could tie him up and kidnap him to be her groom. The sun steeds were her co-conspirators."

Demeter groaned. "Did he help her tie the knots?"

"Not for the ropes she used for the kidnapping, but they did tie their handfasting cord together."

"Why bother stealing him?" Demeter grumbled.

Leto sighed. "The worst part about all this is that she actually had a good reason." She reached for the bottle of wine her new daughter in law had gifted her. "Despite the fact they've been quietly courting for centuries, she didn't think her parents or the King and Queen of Olympus would allow them to marry, if for different reasons. And if they eloped, the blame would have fallen mostly on Apollo. She wanted to make it very clear that she was the one to blame."

A difficult task with her son ready to go to war to defend his new role as Perseleia's husband, but there had been eyewitnesses aplenty to Apollo being lead to the Temple bound in rope after Perseleia had landed the Sun Chariot.

The fact he'd been starry eyed and literally glowing with delight made it into most of the accounts of the day, but not all.

Oh, what if Poseidon accidentally gave Perseleia the idea to use sailor’s knots/hand fasting to tie her and Apollo together. Like, she just swims right up to her dad one day and asks if the sea has any plants or food that works the same as food in the Underworld. Poseidon is confused (and worried that someone that’s not him or from the Sea Fam is trying to trap Perseleia but he’ll investigate that later) but tells her no, none of their food works like that. However, maybe a lot of merpeople were taking mortal sailors as their spouses, and came up with the idea of literally tying a knot around their hands to bind themselves to each other. Some kind merfolk took pity on the mortals and taught how to both tie and undo those same knots and now sailors are known for their strong ropes and knots.

A few weeks later, Perseleia goes up to the surface to live with her mother, and then kidnaps Apollo shortly afterwards.

Perseleia tying the knot, pausing periodically to make sure she’s not tying it too tight and cutting off circulation or hurting Apollo: Are you ok? It’s not too tight right? Does it hurt anywhere?

Apollo, starry-eyed and ready to be kidnapped: You could tie the rope around my neck and drag me to the temple like a dog and I’d still thank you.

Perseleia: What was that?

Apollo, a certified simp: I’m fine, love of my life.

Apollo desperately trying to figure out what he can eat or do that would have a similar effect to persephone’s pomegranate just in case someone does something stupid like “save him”

Apollo eating everything Perse makes for him because a) she made it herself and food as a metaphor for love and b) her cooking is amazing and c) no lover had ever cooked for him before

Apollo asks Persephone for advice on how to get married/kidnapped.

Apollo also hisses at any gods stupid enough to try to save him. “If you save me, I will never forgive you.” - Apollo, probably.

Idk if anyone else remembers, but Batman canonically carries around Bat-cookies according to the Batman/Scooby-Doo crossover.

I LOVE to think Batman carries them around as snacks for Robin. I love it even more to think he uses said cookies to bribe Robin into good behavior in a similar fashion to Scooby Snacks.

The Batfam doesn't realize they got pretty privilege.

Like sure, they know they're attractive because duh, they're basically celebrities, their looks is all people talk about. But the small stuff? The opened doors, the free gifts, the extra smiles and good attitude? That, they're completely clueless to.

It doesn't help that it happens to all of them and most their friends, so nobody notices it's out of the ordinary.

Clark goes "The lady at the cafeteria gifted me this cake" and Bruce is like "Oh yeah, she does that"... She doesn't.

Kory gets offered to cut in line to the front at a concert and tells Dick "People here are so nice!", and instead of noticing the favoritism, Dick holds out three STAFF passes and goes "I know right! Look that lady over there is going to take us backstage!", and they laugh while Wally's eye twiches.

Tim goes undercover wearing cheap loose clothes, contacts and a fake nose, and people are just so mean to him, like no manners at all. They bump into him, ignore him, he says 'Good morning' to an old lady, and she doesn't even say it back! ... He comes back ranting about rude people and what not. And Jason is like "Really? But they're so nice in that neighborhood, that old lady is always giving me candy!". Barbara doesn't know how to tell them the nose simply made Tim look average for once.

Damian. Hits. It. Off. At the pediatric unit of the hospital he's volunteering at. Kids love him, and he thinks it's because Jon was right about the 'Always greet them with a smile' thing, but in reality it's because half the kids got a puppy-love crush on him. Jon, just as oblivious is like "Told you sooo".

Stephanie thinks it's the good karma. She gets a whole ass perfume bottle for free at the mall and is like "See Cass? It's that robbery we stopped last week, the universe is giving it back". Cass, with a perfume of her own, knows better but nods anyway.

Duke thinks they're all dumb and unaware, and he's making fun of them when Alfred goes "And I suppose you think Miss Carrington has saved you a seat at the bus for the last three weeks just because". Duke doesn't say anything after that.

IN THE BATCAVE

Bruce: *sitting at Batcomputer minding his own business*

Jason: *getting ready for patrol*

Dick: *asks nicely*

Dick: Jay, could you hand me my escrimas?

Jason: *deadpans*

Jason: Go get them yourself, Dickface.

Tim: *walks in*

Tim: Jason, could you toss me my bo staff, please?

Jason: *no hesitation, tosses Tim his bo staff*

Dick: *shooketh*

Dick: Why do you help him and not me??? I'm your big bro, Little Wing!

Jason: Middle children have to stay together.

Dick: *confused af because Jay and Tim are his only brothers*

Tim: *curious*

Bruce: *frozen before turning around slowly*

Dick: Jason, you're the only middle child... right?

Jason: *laughs nervously*

Jason: Oh, would you look at that! Crime Alley is calling my name!

Jason: *runs*

---

SOMEWHERE IN NANDA PARBAT

Damian: *sneezes*

Damian: Somebody mentioned me.

---

LATER THAT EVENING

Talia: *on the phone with Bruce*

Talia: What! Me?! Hide a child of yours?!

Talia: *looks at Damian and a picture of Jason*

Talia: Never, Beloved.

Demeter is eyeing Hades like a hawk as he’s holding Perse.

I agree the custody battle would be a lot uglier l, but I feel like they’d still end up in the 50/50 situation. Especially if baby Percy still recognizes her father even if she doesn’t know why. As her father, he is the head of her household despite her own mother’s divinity. I think split custody is the best Athena could get given I doubt Zeus would want to end up setting a precedent to contest the rights of fathers in the ruling of their households at the risk of undermining his own authority later on. It is a deeply patriarchal society at the time. And considering Amphitrite is willing to step up there’s little risk in mistreatment if that is a concern being tossed around.

Eventually, yeah, but they would have to find Athena first 😂

Meanwhile, in one of Athena’s hidden temples…

Athena: Aren’t you the cutest being in the world? Yes you are, owlet! You’re such a clever little girl. Mama’s got you. *kisses Perse’s chubby baby cheek*

here’s your chibi athenide and asclepius, anon!! thank you so much for the prompt 🫶

@chaoticdumbassrogue

Hear me out:

Tiny Twins AU.

-when Annabeth and Percy are sent back they retain their cognitive functioning levels but are reverted to like 5-8 year olds meaning their fine motor skills are shot.

-they’re also just the most adorable children but that’s neither here nor there.

-when Apollo sees Percy he gets a vision of the woman she’s going to become. Full of life and love. A melodious laughter and he falls in love. Not with like babified her but the woman she’s going to grow into and decides he’s going to be a part of it. Basically he takes on the form of a fellow child to just hang out whenever they do so.

-Poseidon blames Athena and Athens for them being fully formed mentally but born into child bodies because obviously it’s due to them spurning his gift.

-not that he minds that his adorable daughters are just so tiny. Not at all.

-they get to deal with their whole world being turned upside down while also fighting their new bodies.

-annabeth straight up gets grumpy tired because she refuses to sleep

-they both braid sea shells and coral into the sea fams hair.

-“Lord Poseidon, you umm. Have a child climbing on you.”

Poseidon: She seems to enjoy it.

-just adorable moments.

Snippet

Random thought when I was unable to read the newest Of The Fountain update

Apollo: What would have been the way you wished the Trojan war to end? If Aphrodite had not protected Paris as she had?

Perse: Ideally, Aphrodite would have blessed Paris that no weapon forged by man could harm him, or that no mortal man could slay him.

Perse: In the case of the first, I could gift Menelaus a carved weapon, stone or wood or bone. Or ensure that neither he nor Paris had weapons at hand. In the case of the second, he could have been slain by any simple beast or non mortal if I could not find a woman willing to kill him.

Apollo: And if he had been blessed with both?

Perse: I would have feigned sleep, unguarded. And then strangled him with my girdle, the one Mother wove for me. Or I could have loaned it to Eleni, she would have done it quite happily.

Apollo:...

(Internally: Oath on the river Styx Apollo, you Swore an Oath on the River Styx, You Can Not propose marriage...)

Perse: Oh! I could have had him trampled by his own horse!

Apollo: I hate owls.

And thus, every child of Apollo henceforth has an innate hatred of owls. The owls of CHB like to stretch their legs either facing the Apollo Cabin or on the Athena Cabin.

Athenide Twins AU post getting memories back: and the Giant War is over

The demigod and friends gang is playing a drinking game of never have I ever:

Percy: ever have I ever thrown a hairbrush at the king of titans

Rachel : *grumbling as she takes a swig*

Will: Never have I ever traveled to the underworld, more than four times. ((Trying to just get Nico and Hazel))

*Nico, Hazel, Percy, and Annabeth take a swig*

Leo: never have I ever visited Atlantis

*Percy and Annabeth both take a drink to everyone’s confusion*

Annabeth: never have I ever carried the sun god’s child while pinning for him.

*Percy takes a drink*

Percy: never have I ever tried to castrate Heracles.

*Annabeth takes a swig*

Annabeth: I stand by the fact he had it coming and it would’ve solved a lot of problems.

Grover: Wait, WHAT?!

Piper: shh let this cook.

Percy was just disappointed Annabeth didn't succeed. And hey, Perse admitted to pining!

Also, there's a very good chance any Gods watching (Dionysus? They're drinking, it's a party) is Losing their Mind.

Dionysus is about to crash the party just to demand answers. After he gets his answers, he turns into a little boy, wanting to be coddled by his mama and auntie.

@chaoticdumbassrogue

Smite them by ‘politely’ sending a prayer to their parents and ‘It’s complicated’ friends (Hermes and Apollo) about how these two have ‘kidnapped’ them with the intent to marry them.

Then they just sit back and enjoy the show.

Apollo and Hermes flash there so fast-

Theseus and Pirithous: *about to do something stupid*

Apollo: *looming over Theseus, bow shiny and arrows sharpened*

Hermes: *smiling devilishly as he stands behind Pirithous, fingers twitching, ready to strangle him*

Theseus: P-Pirithous? Buddy?

Pirithous: Theseus there’s someone beh-

Hermes: What was that darling? I could’ve sworn you were about to do something to dearest Arsinoe here. But that can’t be true, right?

Apollo: Yes. Surely you wouldn’t be so foolish as to try to wed Perseleia.