why don't you go read a 20k friends to lovers slowburn and maybe you'll calm down

come help me die, my daughter

Every now and then, seemingly out of nowhere, someone will reblog my last cover for Shameful Crushes. I couldn’t remember if I’d ever posted the other two, but here they are all together.

I want to do a Boys of Summer edition, but I really just want an excuse to use those beach photos of Thom Yorke. 

hey so last night i was looking for charming teddy bears, and what should have been a just and noble quest devolved into a horrible discovery:

for around 200 big ones, you can purchase a teddy bear with the body of a man and the eyes of a creature that knows it should not exist

despite the fact it's dressed like the boring guy you avoid at office christmas parties in every ad, it does not, in fact, arrive at your home khaki'd up and ready to go.

he's 5'7" so i hope you just have clothes for an adult man just laying around. and yes, his name is Puffy.

anyways the naked photos further cement his horrid homunculus status.

all of the information provided about this thing make it seem like its creators only have a passing understanding of human beings.

i mean like yeah. that is true. teddy bears are usually shaped like bears and this one certainly is not.

kill the ones you love. puffy is enough.

puffy is enough.

hey! don't be scared, okay?

puffy is a milky brown!

sorry i can't believe i forgot the most ominous thing on the site

Provoke the blade and suffer its sting 🗡️

So beautiful

DEMI MOORE as ELISABETH SPARKLE THE SUBSTANCE (2024) dir. Coralie Fargeat

I'm not a fan of how often modern fandom folk treat their favourite characters like sweet little princesses and god forbid you say anything wrong about them. I want my favourite character to get beaten up in the streets and then get peed on

We all give our answers to this. One way or another

matt just fired half the remaining tumblr support staff lmao

from my sources adjacent to tumblr--from which i can spread rumors and insider information freely because i dont give a fuck about ever working in the tech sector--im hearing this round of firings was focused on purging the senior staff, and not just from support but from the entire remaining tumblr workforce. i'm hearing there are about 25 people left.

"What good, this heart of stone, for it to be shattered?"

it's called the Switch 2 because you Switch 2 a cheaper hobby

Am I your dream girl?

You think of me in bed

But you could never hold me

And like me better in your head

Make me evil

Then I'm an angel instead

At least you'll sanctify me when I'm dead

-Florence + The Machine, Dream Girl Evil