[microwave sounds]

canceled my prime membership today

To reduce my screen time, I have weaponised my overactive and entirely impractical levels of empathy for inanimate objects. Wym you’re picking it up again? While it was sleeping? You complete and utter monster, let it rest!!

And it works. It works like a CHARM. Silly problems require silly solutions!

[ID: a phone tucked in very cozy in a perfectly fitting wooden doll-size canopy bed with floral motifs. it has a little dishtowel as a blanket /End ID]

several people have been like "why is this marked mature?" and "why is your pfp blurred?" but as far as I can see, it's not.

weird.

oh it's android only? weird.

yeah I think they re-enabled the shitty NSFW-detection algorithm, the one that just looks for flesh tones.

Tumblr algorithm:

Which apparently cannot be found through tumblr gif search because of the evil P-word

I don't think it's even that smart. this isn't an AI system trying to identify the contents of the image and matching that against a blacklist, this is probably just flesh-tone detection

im so serious about this but if youre autistic and especially if youre chronically ill creative labour cannot be your only way to relax. working on a creative project is still working. take time to do nothing. its good for you i promise.

Not now kitten daddy's googling his symptoms

Daddy has five days left to live

I wonder if Neil’s owner/s know about how we celebrate the date of that photo

Neil himself is long gone from this world, and yet every April 13th this group of internet strangers come together to celebrate him and his act of banging out the tunes. Like an entire holiday, all for this little guy

Cause I think it’s pretty beautiful if you wanna get all sentimental and sappy

good news :)

this was the last post before 4chan got hacked 😭

Secret Panel HERE 🧠 tapas.io/episode/3418197

I’ve been listening to the people in the apartment below me have arguments for two years now and I still can’t figure out what language they’re speaking. The best I can narrow it down is like if Portuguese and Hebrew had a baby. Is that a common pidgin combination

I just listened to a clip of this and jesus christ you fucking got it. there are like 3500 people in the whole united states who speak this and two of them are in a very fraught marriage four feet below me

if the kraken and sharks get good at the same time we will have a beautiful toxic rivalry <3

current events at the bottom of the pacific

It is sometimes concerning to be a marine biologist

unironically caught myself typing this without thinking maybe i need to be put down ethically

i feel like getting shot would feel so interesting for two seconds and then it would probably feel bad

fuck it

we ball

(as usual feel free to meme the shit outta these images. impact text it, deep fry it, whatever, have fun!)

I have sent you to the Hunter's Dream

bouta head out for a gossip session with the bestie, eileen

for the complete experience

i just... i just wanna wake up to crab raves..

so. many crab rave.. plese

you will not replace me

When real life and Magnus cross paths.