Coming Home (Part Seventeen)

Azriel x Reader

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten | Part Eleven | Part Twelve | Part Thirteen | Part Fourteen | Part Fifteen | Part Sixteen

THE LAST PART 😭😭Although, I am doing 2 bonus parts — one of that Starfall kiss, and Az’s reaction to Y/N going travelling, and one of Y/N and Lucien’s steamy night in that little cottage in the storm — because I 💅🏻can’t let things go💅🏻😏

Honestly, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again — @greeneyedivy has helped me so much with this story, so thank you lovie 💕and thank you all for your wonderful, wonderful comments and support. I can’t express how much I appreciate it🥹

Warnings: SMUUUUUT 🌶️ I hope this is satisfying for you all lmao — I’m not confident in my smut writing abilities AT ALL. Also, hope you don’t mind ✨romantic sex✨ because this got a tad…sentimental.

Anyway — enjoy!

⧪

You tried – so, so rigorously – to match your breathing to the calming roll of the waves.

It wasn’t working. 

Your nerves were gripping you – cinching you tighter and tighter. You pressed your hands to the solid surface of the sandstone wall. In through the nose, out through the mouth.

You could do this. You’d seen him in your life more times than you could count – why was now any different? Why, now, were you trembling so thoroughly, it was difficult to stand?

Because he was your mate – that was why. The word clanged around your head loudly, violently. Mate, mate, mate.

And he would be here any moment.

You didn’t even know where you were to greet him. He could winnow onto the beach, or on the palace steps, or maybe into the city centre. Perhaps you were standing in entirely the wrong place, looking foolish as you clutched at the wall and bowed over, trying your hardest not to hyperventilate. 

No – this was pointless, you standing here. You’d be better off waiting inside, where you could sit with a glass of wine and wait. However long you needed to.

Maybe he would change his mind and wouldn’t come at all. It wouldn’t be the first time he’d had second thoughts about you. Maybe he hadn’t even left Velaris. 

You turned in one swift movement, meaning to stalk back inside and fix yourself that strong drink you so desperately needed – if only to quiet the shouting in your head.

But your entire body stilled, went taut, at the figure stood right there.

Darkness incarnate. A brilliant vision of night, too breathtaking to put into words, to capture in a painting. His hair was slightly windswept, his golden skin glowing like sunlight and gilded by the shadows that snaked around him. The early morning light shone through his wings, accentuating the deep reds and golds that the dark, membranous texture usually hid. His hazel eyes stared at you so intensely, intently, that you were surprised your clothes didn’t just fall right off you. 

You should have known that you wouldn’t hear his approach. No footfalls, not even a slight creaking of those stunning, intricate leathers he was wearing. Just pure silence – a shadow in the night. And he was here.

Your mate.

Were you breathing? You honestly didn’t know. Your chest felt…tight. Constricted. Your hands shook. 

“Hello…” His deep voice was a whisper, a caress against your skin. Silky and smooth and mouthwatering–

You stared at him – any words you ever knew gone from your mind. 

And then everything went black.

⧪

“...Y/N?”

Your eyes fluttered open, and there he was again. 

Beautiful. So utterly beautiful. 

You were lying down – the solid surface of a chaise holding you up. Azriel watched you closely, watched every tiny expression as confusion – and understanding – flooded to your face.

And embarrassment.

The corner of his mouth twitched. “You…actually fainted.”

You sat up quickly, the room spinning around you. Not even realising what you were doing, you shoved him away from you and stood up. 

“You’re here.” You blurted, blinking.

“...Yes. I am.” A worried frown furrowed his brow. “...You asked me to come…”

Your mate. Your mate. He was here – in front of you. No longer were you trying to drag up the image of him into your brain. He was a real, tangible thing before you – huge and muscled and stunning. Your mate.

“You’re here.” You repeated, your voice a rasp. You really needed that wine. 

“Y/N–”

But you didn’t let him finish. You were nothing more than a flash of light as you launched yourself at him – wrapped your arms around him.

Warm. He was so warm, and solid, and real. You didn’t even care about the leathers creating a barrier as you held him, and squeezed, burying your head into his chest.

His own arms snaked around you, and you thought you may just die at the feeling. You thought – thought you felt him shudder, as he cradled the back of your head with his hand and rested his chin atop.

Was he crying? It felt like it…that slight tremble you could feel through his leathers. You tried to look up at his face, to see, but he held you tighter, burying his face into your hair.

His voice definitely cracked as he murmured the two words you’d waited over a century to hear.

“My love.” 

⧪

“Az, it’s nothing–”

“Tilt your head down.” 

A soft sigh escaped your lips, but you did as he said – if only because the close proximity between your faces made it impossible for you to think. 

The small graze on your head that you’d gained from fainting was already healing itself, the blood already dried, but your mate still insisted on kneeling before you with a warm washcloth and cleaning the area with such soft, tender strokes. 

You closed your eyes – because his were right there, and you weren’t sure you could gaze into them without fainting again. His breath was fanning your face, and you knew…you knew he was studying every bit of you and gulping the details down greedily.

“You’re not going to be able to avoid my eyes forever.” He said quietly, his fingers gently holding your jaw.

“I can try.” You mumbled – and blushed. “...I’m worried I’ll faint again.”

He sat back, placing the cloth aside. “Well – it’s never been an issue before. What’s so different now?” 

Then – then you opened your eyes, and forced them to meet his. Your cheeks were burning as you replied, “You know what.”

He stared at you. And stared, and stared, for what seemed like an eternity, his gaze intense and smouldering, his head on the slightest tilt. 

“Yes.” He hummed, inching closer. “I do know.”

You could only watch as his body moved closer to yours, and when his warm fingers gently brushed your knee, you jolted, standing up so quickly, it was a wonder you didn’t topple over.

“Have you–” You blurted, clearing your throat. You strode over to the drinks cabinet at the other side of the room, your legs, hands, everything, trembling. “Have you seen Tarquin yet? He’ll be around here…somewhere. I’m sure he’d like to see you.”

Stop rambling, your mind hissed at you. Calm. Breathe.

Az’s gaze was so intent on your back, you could feel it – feel him, as he watched you, trying to puzzle you out. 

“I’ve seen him.” He said, his voice a slow, deep lilt. “I saw him when I got here, and he told me where to find you. He decided to leave for the day – to give us some space, to…talk.” 

Talk. Yes. The two of you definitely needed to do that. To talk…and–

You closed your eyes. Composed yourself. There was no point falling apart in front of him, no matter how easy it would be to do so – you’d get nowhere with that. 

Az was so, so patient, not even uttering a word as you steadied your breaths and your trembling hands. And when your shoulders felt looser, lighter, when you didn’t feel so susceptible to melting into a puddle in his presence, you turned to face him once more. 

“I want you to tell me everything.” You said. “Your side of things.” 

⧪

You watched him so intently, in the quiet of that sitting room.

Watched him, and drank the sight of him in like he may just disappear before your very eyes. You were sat, while he stood, his boots thudding lightly against the floor as he slowly wandered the room, his face pinched with thought and his fingers mindlessly brushing over the trinkets and decorations scattered all over the place.

You waited – just like he had waited for you. Gave him space to think. You knew he wasn’t a natural speaker, that his power was in silence and stealth, but he would try – for you. 

After a while of comfortable silence, he stopped beside the hearth, his fingers tracing the intricate carvings in the mantelpiece.

“Do you remember,” He murmured, angling himself towards you, “your nineteenth birthday?” 

Of course. You’d briefly touched on it months ago, when he’d taken you shopping for that Starfall dress. Gods, it seemed so long ago now. You nodded, clasping your hands in your lap. 

“You and I had been growing…closer…leading up to it.” He said. “I could sense that..that you probably had some feelings for me. But I didn’t know whether it was just a phase. That you’d turn your head as soon as someone more interesting came along.”

The idea was so ludicrous, you almost scoffed – both at the idea of it being a phase, and the suggestion that anyone was more interesting than him. Ridiculous.

“I didn’t pay it much mind, to begin with. At the time, you were just Rhys’s sister – someone I was incredibly fond of.” He frowned. “And I wanted to be…delicate with your feelings. Respectful. You’d been through a lot and I didn’t want to add to that.” 

You watched as he moved from the hearth, rubbing the back of his neck. Hard – this was hard for him. Part of you wanted to reach out, to take his hands and soothe him through it…but you knew he needed to do this alone. That you had to let him speak, uninterrupted. To explore his own feelings, uninterrupted. 

“But I was just…” He cleared his throat. Toyed with his hands. “I was so…in awe of you. You’d been through such terrible things, had been treated abhorrently, and yet you had such light in you. I’d seen people completely break over lesser things, but you…you were resilient. And don’t get me wrong, Y/N, I knew you were struggling beneath it all – we all did – but you still managed to make others smile. And laugh. And I found myself…craving your company. Enjoying being around you more than anyone else. I found myself walking into a room and seeking you out. Looking forward to the quiet conversations we would have while the others wreaked havoc around us.” 

You glanced down at your hands. He truly had no idea – no idea how much his company had helped you at those times. Those quiet conversations. 

“We are complete opposites, you and I.” He stopped before you, perching on the pouffe centimetres from your feet. “I’m quiet and…calculating. Pensive. A natural spymaster. I’m like…I’m like the wind. There and gone in a heartbeat. And you…you are like fire. You’re so bright and fierce. Such a presence. And I think that’s why I was so drawn to you. Why I couldn’t stay away. Because being in your presence made me feel like fire, too. Made me feel alive.”

So, so slowly, he reached out a single hand, tentatively brushing his fingers over yours. The touch was feather-light and barely there, but it was enough – enough to soothe both of you. To make it easy for him to continue. 

“So I suspected…that I was beginning to feel something towards you.” He said, swallowing. “I wanted to be with you more and more…to hear your laugh. Hear you talk about things. And I kept finding myself just thinking about you. And then…” He exhaled a deep breath, “then it was your nineteenth birthday – your party. I took one look at you in your dress and the breath was knocked out of me. You looked stunning. And everyone else saw it, too. I was watching male after male after male walk up to you and ask you to dance, and even though you were clearly enjoying yourself, I thought I may just rip the entire room to pieces. And that made me realise I was utterly fucked.”

His gaze fell to your joined hands. “I panicked – completely. I convinced myself that if Rhys or Cassian ever found out that I was looking at you that way, they’d hate me for it. So I tried to fight it. To put up a wall and pretend I wasn’t feeling things for you. But then…the Starfall after that, you tried to kiss me, and – gods, I don’t know how I found it in me not to kiss you back. To push you away. I told myself it was the right thing, but I saw how hurt you were and I hated myself for it.”

So it hadn’t all been in your head – the events leading up to that night. You hadn’t simply imagined the secret glances, the subtle touches, and gotten the wrong impression. Az had just been…trying to stop himself.

“I decided I was going to talk to you, after we’d had a bit of space. Try to smooth things over. But then…” His eyes shuttered. His thumb stroked the back of your hand. “But then suddenly, Rhys was coming to us and saying that you’d left. That you’d gone travelling, and he didn’t know when you’d be back. And I knew immediately that it wasn’t just some attraction…lust…that I felt for you, because I felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. The thought of not seeing you anymore, not having you to talk to and laugh with…”

You squeezed his hand. “I am sorry…that I didn’t say goodbye. I didn’t think I could face it.”

His answering smile was soft, understanding. “Every year, on Solstice or on Starfall, I would tell myself that that would be the year you’d turn back up on the doorstep. It didn’t matter how much time passed…I still thought of you all the time. Dreamt of you often. I even found myself getting jealous of the thought of you out there, involving yourself with other males. I heard through the grapevine, once, that you’d bedded a Vanserra, and I got it into my head that it was Eris. The next time I saw him, I punched him for it. And to this day, he still doesn’t know why I punched him. Finding out years later that it was actually Lucien didn’t make me feel much better.”

You snorted, bowing your head. The thought of Az losing his cool and unleashing himself on Eris – out of jealousy – did unexpected things to you. You felt that familiar coiling in your gut. The tingle between your legs. 

“And then, when you did finally turn up last Solstice, and I answered the door to you…” His eyes developed a faraway look; one that had you thinking he’d taken himself back there, right to that very moment. “When I saw you, it was like…waking up. I just wanted to kiss you then and there. And out of nowhere, there was a voice in my head…saying…I love her. I am in love with this female…and it completely shook me. It was why I couldn’t speak any other words than holy fuck. You’d turned back up after all these years, and I knew immediately that I was completely in love with you, and I had been for a very long time.”

A tear rolled down your cheek. And then another. And another. So long, you’d wanted to hear this. So long, you thought you’d been left to love him, unrequited.

“Why didn’t you just tell me, Az?” You whispered. “Why continue to push me away and make me think those feelings weren’t returned?”

“Because I was a complete coward. I was still scared of the repercussions if Rhys and Cassian found out. And I didn’t…” He stopped. Sighed. Bowed his head. “I didn’t think I deserved you. I still don’t. You came back, and you were so much more mature, so brilliant, and I thought…I thought there was no way I was worthy of you.” 

“Stop that.” You grabbed both of his hands – forced him to look at you. “I understand, Az. I understand what it’s like to feel unworthy and undeserving. To become so convinced by your own hatred for yourself. But there is nobody – nobody – more deserving of love, and of happiness, than you. You are not what your family made you think are, just as I am not what my father made me think I am. You’re brave. Strong. Good. You have the most beautiful heart I’ve ever seen.” 

Az didn’t tear his eyes from yours. Even as tears began to spill from them and roll down his cheeks. Even as his lips trembled, and he looked so, so relieved, you wanted to bundle him up and never let him go. He let those tears fall freely, let you see them. Because you were his mate.

“I’m so sorry for how I treated you. How I hurt you.” He rasped. “But that heart – my heart – it’s yours. Completely. If you want it.” 

Of course you did. The want and need you had for him was a part of you, as much a part of you as breathing, as living.

But, of course, you hadn’t officially accepted the mating bond. You knew that if you rejected it, Az would turn and leave, no questions asked. 

And such a thing wouldn’t even cross your mind. But you’d had six months apart…you wanted some easy time with him first – before…before eternity lay before you. 

So you cupped his face in your hands and wiped each of his tears away, brushing your lips over the wet streaks on his cheeks. And then you kissed his forehead, and sat back to smile at him. 

“Would you like to take a walk on the beach?”

⧪

The two of you spent three days just…talking. Catching up. 

Nothing went any further than that. The light touches you shared were tentative, there just for the sake of touching each other. And the glances you shared over the dinner table each night were undoubtedly heated, but…you were giving it time. Allowing things to evolve naturally. And you always wanted to be respectful to Tarquin, grateful for his and his court’s hospitality.

Even if you did want to devour your mate. Whole.

Saying goodnight to each other and sleeping in separate bedrooms was near torture. You practically had to pin your own legs to the bed, just to resist sneaking across the hall and sliding into his bed. Sliding your hands into his trousers.

And he…he was entirely respectful. Always allowing you to make the first move. Never pushing it too far. You hadn’t even kissed.

Those three days were both blissful and downright infuriating. Filled with walking along the beach and talking, talking, talking. Gazing at each other over breakfasts of fruits and pastries. Trying to concentrate on Tarquin’s conversations whilst simultaneously staring at Az’s mouth. 

You couldn’t take it much longer.

At the end of the third night, after a pleasant dinner with your hosts, you and Az had once again returned to the beach. You sat with the tide washing over your bare feet whilst you engaged in easy, unimportant conversation. You couldn’t stop your hand repeatedly inching towards his leg. His arm. The strands of his hair. You wanted every part of him – all over you. 

It was when you returned to the palace, and he walked you to your bedroom door, leaning in to peck your cheek, that you grabbed his hand. 

“Az.” You murmured softly. “I–I think I’m ready.”

His soft gaze roamed over you, alighting with hope as he tilted his head. “Ready for what?”

“Coming home.”

⧪

Leaving the Summer Court the following morning – leaving your friend – was bittersweet. You hugged Tarquin so tightly, he had to eventually peel you off of him. 

He’d kissed you on your head – kind, brotherly. You’d forever be grateful for what he’d given you these past six months. What he’d done for you.

You knew, as you stared at him, that you wouldn’t have survived it without him. He’d pulled you back from the brink. 

“Perhaps I’ll visit you soon.” He said, glancing to Az at your side, and then back to you. A smirk lifted his lips. “If you’re not too busy.” 

You snorted, swatting his arm. “You’re welcome any time.” 

You turned to take Az’s hand, to be winnowed out there, but you blinked as he stepped forward and clasped a hand over Tarquin’s shoulder. 

“I will forever be indebted to you.” He said quietly. “For keeping her safe. For helping her.”

Tarquin bowed his head, and you could have sworn a light dusting of pink smattered his cheeks. “You will always have a friend in the Summer Court.” 

You didn’t doubt it. Turning before you could cry again – for what felt like the hundredth time that day – you straightened yourself out. And smiled. 

Az stopped before you, warm hands gently rubbing your arms. “Do you have another layer? The cold weather has hit Velaris already.” It was only the very beginning of autumn, but it didn’t take long for Velaris to be coated in frost. 

“No, but–” You gripped his hand. Stared up at him. “I don’t want to go back to Velaris straight away. I’m–I want you to take me to the cabin.”

His hazel eyes were like twin flames as he stared back at you. He swallowed – hard – and then nodded. “Alright. The cabin it is.” 

He laced his fingers through yours, and with one last wave to Tarquin, the two of you were sucked into darkness. 

⧪

You hadn’t been there in over a century – the cabin. But there was hardly any difference to the last time you’d stood in its warmth. The only changes were from Feyre’s hands, the intricate pictures she’d painted on the walls. You smiled as your gaze drifted over them. 

Az hovered nearby – but kept distance between you. Kept his hands in his pockets, his back pressed against the wood-panelled wall, as you slowly drifted around the room and allowed memories to come to life. Memories of nights here with your family, the echoes of laughter still zipping all around you. It made you smile.

Made you feel nothing but happy. Whole. 

Only when you’d reacquainted yourself with every room did you wander back through to the sitting room. Az looked up, now perched on the leather sofa, the huge hearth roaring heat that wrapped around you. Outside, the snowy mountains stretched all around, nothing else for miles and miles and miles.

You were truly alone. Just you and your mate. 

You stared at him. Studied him – his beauty. How he couldn’t see the utter perfection of himself, you would never understand.

And he was yours. Forever.

You’d been methodical about this – having known for the last three days what your decision would be. You’d not stopped to eat breakfast that morning, simply telling Az you were too nervous about returning home to think about food. He hadn’t eaten a thing, either. 

Perfect. He had to be starving.

You cleared your throat, leaning against the wall. “What would you like to eat?” 

He stared at you. Swallowed. “What?” 

“I want to make you something. What would you like?” 

His eyes shuttered, and he knew – you both knew – what you were saying without really saying it.

That he was your mate, and you were his. That you accepted the bond gladly, happily, proudly. That you loved him fiercely. 

“I. Um.” He cleared his throat, cheeks slightly pink. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to…”

His words trailed off as you came towards him. His eyes didn’t leave you once as you perched on his knee and reached up to brush his hair back from his face. One hand of his steadied your waist, while the other rested on your leg. 

“I don’t feel,” You hummed, “like I have to do anything. I want to make you something to eat – partly because we skipped breakfast. But mainly to show you that I accept this bond between us. That I am yours, and you are mine. And I love you.” 

Those were tears, again, in his eyes. You’d seen him cry more these last three days than you had in your entire life. But he didn’t try to blink them away or hide them. He gazed up at you, and he kissed the hand that you used to wipe those very tears away. 

“I love you.” You said again. “I’ve always loved you. And I always will.” 

“I love you, too.” He rasped. 

You leaned in and kissed him – quick, short, determined to save those touches for when he’d eaten, and you had him to yourself. He tried to linger against you, groaning. 

“Tell me what you want to eat, Az.” You said against his lips.

“You.”

You chuckled. “Aside from me.”

“Just make me some fucking toast, I don’t care.” His voice was a delicious growl. “I doubt this place is even stocked – we haven’t been up here for a few months.”

You hummed, rising from his lap. You had to literally peel his hands from you – a fact that had you grinning as you wandered over to the kitchen area. 

You rifled through the cupboards – mostly empty, apart from longlife baking ingredients. Not even a loaf of bread to make that fucking toast. So you’d have to improvise. 

Fine. That was absolutely fine. Even though you felt hot all over, and you were tingling between your thighs, and the last thing you wanted to do was spend too long in the kitchen when you could be in your mate’s lap. 

But this part was important. So you dug out the ingredients you could find, and you got started. 

Az watched you from the sofa, always keeping his distance as you mixed and stirred and poured. Baking had never been your strong point – you’d learnt that on your travels – but you had a feeling that right now, Azriel would eat a plate of mud if you served it up to him.

Within forty-five minutes, the smell of chocolate had filled the cabin. You pulled the cake from the oven, frowning down at its sunken centre. At the slightly darker bits around the edges. 

Soft footfalls sounded from behind. And then Az was behind you, your bodies close enough to touch. He stared down at the…thing in your hands, tilting his head.

“...It was supposed to be a cake.” You frowned. “For you. I can scrape the burnt bits off–”

“Fuck the burnt bits.” He reached out, his fingers digging into the sponge. It didn’t seem to bother him that it’d just come out of the oven.

“Az, I haven’t even iced it.”

“I.” He kissed your shoulder. “Don’t.” He reached into a drawer without even looking, digging for a fork. “Care.” 

And then the fork was stabbed into that sad excuse for a cake you’d made. Az’s eyes were wild, feral, as he used the fork to cut himself a portion, the sponge still billowing steam. He met your gaze, and lifted it to his lips. You couldn’t tear your eyes away as he slowly took the fork into his mouth. That warmth between your legs intensified. 

“Delicious.” He growled, his tongue darting out to wipe tiny chocolate crumbs from his bottom lip. 

You snorted. “I highly doubt that.”

“I wasn’t talking about the cake.” 

Your cheeks heated. He took another bite, and another, perhaps so touched by his early years of eating terrible, bland food, that your pathetic, undecorated cake was delicious to him.

Or maybe…maybe he really loved you so much, that it didn’t matter.

He swallowed one more bite, before chucking the fork into the sink. He prised the cake tin from your hands and discarded it onto the counter, your gazes never once parting.

His chest was heaving with heavy breaths as he stared at you. Flickering between your eyes, down to your lips, and back up again. You swallowed beneath the intensity of his gaze.

“What shall we do now?” He murmured, daring another look at your lips. “We could…sleep. Or play a game – there’s still some in the closet, I think. Or go for a walk through the forest…like we used to.” 

No. No, you didn’t want any of those things. You quickly glanced out of the window. “The snow is melting a bit. It’d be muddy and you…we’d…get filthy.” 

Those hazel eyes flared. “You could give me a bath.” 

You laughed softly, glancing down. How many times had you thought about this? About having Az all to yourself…having all of him? How many years had you spent, wishing that very fantasy would come true? 

And now here you were, and you didn’t know what to do, how to act. You may as well have never bedded anyone before, from the way you shifted, twisting your hands, your breaths failing you a bit. 

“...Az.” Your eyes flickered to his. “There’s plenty of time for baths.”

“There is.” He hummed. “So tell me what you want.”

“I want you.” 

A growl tore from his throat, and he was on you so fast, you barely had time to take a breath before his mouth was sliding over yours. You moaned as his hands snaked around you, lifting you up and wrapping your legs around his waist. He kissed you hard, fierce, his hold on your legs firm as he began to walk the two of you out of the kitchen.

He didn’t carry you to the bedroom like you half expected him to. With you still in his arms, his lips still on yours, he fell to his knees beside the hearth. Sat you down in front of him and pulled away.

You stared at each other, huffing heavy breaths. He leaned in again, kissing you once, twice. 

“I’ve thought about this so many times.” He rasped. “In so many ways.”

You swallowed, your eyes following his movements as his deft fingers began to gently lift your shirt. “As have I.” 

He’d never seen you naked before, not even by accident. Apart from the revealing dresses Mor sometimes convinced you to wear, that left very little to the imagination. But never completely…never had you been entirely bare before him.

“I want to taste you.” His voice was a whisper against your skin, travelling over every inch of you whilst every last item of clothing came off. Shirt. Leggings. Underwear and socks. He tossed them all to the side without so much as a glance at them. 

And then you were there, entirely at his mercy. Entirely naked. Nowhere to hide. He pulled back to stare at you. To study every inch of you. Your cheeks burned even more as his eyes slowly travelled down from your face, over the swell of your breasts, down your stomach – and down and down to the spot between your thighs. His gaze was pure hunger. 

“...Why are you looking at me like that?” You shifted.

It was an instinctive, deeply-ingrained thing that had your arm moving over your stomach, just below your breasts – where the scars that Tamlin’s father had left you were visible, stark white against your skin and unmistakable.

Az knew what you were doing immediately. His hand caught your arm – stilled it – and he leaned down, brushing his lips over the biggest scar. The one in that area at the top of your stomach, just under your breast.

The first touch of his lips to your skin had a gasp escaping you. Like tiny little sparks erupting over your body.

“You…” He murmured, his lips gliding over every scar. “Are the most beautiful person I have ever seen.” 

“Az…” You breathed.

And then his mouth was moving up, up over your breast. He took your nipple into his mouth, grazing ever so slightly with his teeth. Your head fell back as you released a moan. 

He chuckled against you deeply, moving to give the other breast the same treatment. “I don’t think I could ever have enough of you. This – you – you’re way better than my dreams.”

Heat pooled to your core. Your voice was husky as you responded, “You dream about me, Shadowsinger?” 

“Fuck.” He grunted, his body going rigid against you. “You–you can’t call me that.” 

“Why? It’s what you are – who you are.” 

“Because hearing you call me that may finish me before this has even begun.” 

You released a breathy laugh; one that turned into a moan as his lips began to travel downwards again. “Fine, then. Show me what you dream about, mate.”

And perhaps that title ended him even more thoroughly than Shadowsinger did, because oh, he showed you. 

He gripped you by the legs – lifted you up just slightly to rest one on each of his shoulders. And then he was eye-level with your centre. You were hot all over, dripping wet, entirely exposed to him. He licked his lips like he was trying not to swallow you whole. 

“So fucking wet.” He whispered, his breath fanning against you. “You’re a wonder, my mate.”

That first dip of his head, the first stroke of his tongue, was like nothing else you had felt in your entire life. Like the entire world cleaved in that moment, unable to take the force of the pleasure that barreled through you.

His tongue toyed with your clit, and you jerked, the sensitivity both too much and not enough at the same time. He let out a deep, growling laugh and laid his hand flat on your stomach to still you. 

“I wanted to do this on Starfall.” He grunted, licking a stripe all the way down to your entrance. “I wanted to taste you – up on that roof. But as soon as I got my fingers inside you, and heard the noises I was drawing from you, I couldn’t pull away until I’d made you finish.” 

You were making those noises now. Az’s tongue circled around your clit again, and there was the slightest of pauses before you felt the pressure – the delicious sensation of him slipping a finger into you. 

“Oh gods,” You gasped, head falling back again. You fisted your hand within Azriel’s hair, tugging him closer. “Fuck, Az.”

“Gods, you taste incredible.”

He feasted on you like he may never get another taste, his finger moving faster and faster inside of you, his tongue singing praises against your clit, and his breathless moans just as relentless, as loud, as yours. The fire was burning hot beside you, the rug beneath you a blissful friction against your sweat-slick skin. Everything was too much, too good. 

You bucked up as you came, Az’s name falling repeatedly from your lips. He licked and stroked and pumped you through your orgasm until you were trembling against him. 

You were still trembling when your breaths had calmed. Az pulled his fingers from you, reaching forward to brush your hair from your face and place a quick kiss on your lips.

“Are you okay?” He stroked your cheek. “Tired?” 

“No.” You breathed, sitting up so fast, you almost fell straight back down. “No. I want you.”

The considerable length of him was straining against his trousers so hard, you imagined it must have been uncomfortable. Az watched, his lips slightly parted, as you moved onto your knees. You pushed him back just slightly – just enough for the coffee table to take his weight.

You straddled him, and his hands immediately flew to your waist as your fingers set about peeling his clothes off layer by layer. He’d removed the bulk of his leathers when you’d arrived at the cabin, leaving him in just a jacket, a tunic and some trousers. But still you took your time, marvelling every glorious inch of his golden, tattooed skin. 

You pressed your lips softly against his, and he immediately caught you in a searing kiss – but you didn’t allow him to linger. A small whine of frustration left his throat as you moved down, ghosting your lips over his neck, his collarbones, his chest–

And then the fine, toned muscles of his stomach. You pressed a kiss to his navel. Moved lower. 

Your fingers trembled as you undid the buttons of his trousers, and he lifted his hips, allowing you to tug them down. 

The length, the thickness, of him, was…overwhelming.

You swallowed as his cock sprang up, rock hard and ready for you. He watched you, studied you – couldn’t resist leaning in to kiss you again.

And it was while he was kissing you – a softer, sweeter kiss – that you reached down and wrapped your hand around him.

He jerked, hissing into your mouth, as you slowly allowed your fingers to explore his length. The pad of your thumb mopped up a little bead of moisture that was already forming on the head. You gently traced your thumb around the area, the slickness making it easy for your hand to begin pumping him – torturously slow. 

“Fuck,” Az grunted against your lips. “Keep touching me like that and I’m gonna cum.” 

“Hmm.” You hummed, shuffling back just slightly – just to make enough room to dip your head. “Feel good?”

“Gods, you have no idea–fuck!

His hips jerked again as your mouth closed over the head of his cock. You glanced up at him, found him watching you ravenously, panting breaths falling from his lips. 

“Shit.” He cursed. His head fell back, eyes falling shut as you took more of him into your mouth. “Mother above, Y/N.”

You laughed softly against him – and you knew what you were doing. Knew that he could feel the vibration of it through every inch of him. You took him in further, further, until you couldn’t possibly take him into your mouth any more, and he was huffing and writhing against you. 

“Stop.” He gasped. “I don’t want to cum yet – want to be inside you.” 

Gods, did you want that more than anything. You savoured the pleasant, slightly salty taste of him as you slowly began to move upwards again, drawing him from your mouth. You pulled him from your lips, pumping him a couple of times with your hand.

“No more games.” He growled, lifting you into his arms. “I need you. Now.”

He didn’t move far. He laid you beside the fire again, kicking fully out of his trousers until he was just as naked as you were. And then he was hovering over you. Staring down at you. Propping himself up on an elbow.

He just…gazed at you, like that. His hand gently brushed a strand of hair from your face, and you realised…realised he was trembling.

“You’re shaking…” You whispered, taking his hand in yours. Those perfect, scarred hands. You kissed it all over, brushing your mouth over his palm, his fingers.

“I’m fucking terrified.” Az laughed softly. 

“Why?”

His eyes were like syrup as they stared into yours. “Because it’s you. And you have my heart, and my soul, and any part of me you could possibly want – forever.” 

You studied his face. Reached up to cup his cheek. “You have all of me too, you know.” 

You could have sworn those were tears in his eyes, again, as he leaned down and kissed you. It started out gentle, soft, tentative – and then began to grow, to pick up pace. He positioned himself over you, his tongue twisting around yours, the taste of him melding with the taste of you. 

“Az.” You whispered against his lips. You reached down, wrapping your hand around his cock. “Fuck me.” 

He groaned, deep and guttural, and allowed you to guide him to your entrance. You felt the slight pressure, the slight pinch – and that glorious, heady sensation of him pushing into you.

It was slow, at first. Inch by inch, he allowed you to adjust to him. You didn’t think you’d ever felt so full, so complete.

And then he was fully seated inside you, right to the hilt. The two of you were joined in every single way. 

“Are you okay?” He breathed. “Can I move?” 

“Yes–Gods–yes.”

With a delicious rasp of a chuckle, he began to do just that, starting with slow, languid thrusts that you swore you could feel through every part of you. And then the pace picked up, his hips moving faster, his thrusts harder, firmer–

And he was just staring at you. His lips were parted, and he was breathing heavily, moans and grunts breaking from his throat, but not once did he look away. Even when you threw your head back, your own moans falling from your lips, he moved your face back to his. Your eyes back to his. 

“It never, ever stops.” He whispered breathlessly, those incredible thrusts picking up. “Wanting you – it doesnt stop.”

You were going to explode. To burst. To cease to exist entirely. He filled you so perfectly, and every bit of it was right. Everything about the two of you, together, was just right.

“Fuck–I can’t–” You gasped as he slammed into you, the sounds of your bodies slapping together slick and addictive. “God’s, Az.” You bucked your hips – pulled him closer, felt him deeper. 

“You feel so perfect around me.” He groaned. He leaned down, capturing your lips in a searing kiss. “Cum for me. Want you to cum.” 

You didn’t know at which point you unravelled completely. Perhaps it was as he continued to kiss you, and his thrusts became frenzied and relentless. Or perhaps it was as he fixed his eyes on yours, and he slid both hands up, up to twine your fingers together. Maybe when he yanked you against him, pulling you into his lap and supporting you as you rode him, and rode him, and rode him, your fingers brushing over his wings–

“Fuck!” He choked, his voice catching in his throat. He went rigid against you, and you felt it – felt him spill every drop of himself inside you as he breathed, “I love you.” 

You came again.

And he didn’t stop saying it, didn’t stop the words from repeatedly falling from his mouth as the two of you trembled in each other’s arms. As he kissed your lips, and your neck, and your breasts. As he held you tightly against him, constantly whispering, I love you, I love you, I love you.

And when the trembling had ceased enough for you to breathe, to move, he pulled you down with him, curling the two of you up beside the fire.

And you thought – this was what happiness felt like. What love felt like. And home.

This was your home. Velaris was your home.

The Inner Circle was your home. 

Azriel was your home. 

Sleepy and content, he tucked you into his side, pressing a soft kiss to your temple. “I love you,” He said again.

You had well and truly come home.

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