Henley Jane Terry
August 27, 2012
2:06 p.m.
7 lb 6.6 oz
It has been 7 weeks since our little Henley was born. She has been such a joy to our family. For some reason it was hard for me to wrap it around my head that we were having another baby the whole time I was pregnant. I think part of it was that I couldn’t imagine being even more blessed then I already was. I feel so grateful to have 4 amazing daughters. I have tasted the difficult side of fertility, certainly not as some have, but still the pains of miscarriages, a year long wait in hope of conception at one time and pregnancy complications with possible risk have made me very grateful for the children I have. There was a time after my first miscarriage where I feared I would not be able to ever have a healthy pregnancy and then when I did, finding out I had a blood disorder which put myself and the baby at risk of hemorrhage during labor made me wonder if anything would ever work out for me. And yet, in a flash I find myself with 4 healthy, beautiful, each uniquely amazing daughters! Henley has been a perfect addition and feels so right in our family.
There is a reason it took me 7 weeks to do a blog post and that is because she hasn’t been the easiest baby and other circumstances have made things a little hard but I am grateful that through it I have still been able to enjoy her and her sweet spirit and love every moment with her. Between all the girls we have dealt with colds, the stomach flu, ear infections, allergies, thrush, yeast rash and more over and over again all since she was born. It seems it has all been thrown at once. Not to mention she was born the day before school started and the beginning of a new school year is always crazy. Henley has colic as some would call it and after about a week and a half she started crying all the time and not sleeping well. With the help of acid reflux medication and the lack of dairy in my diet she has become a different baby in the last week. When before most of my time was spent rocking, bouncing and trying to sooth a baby who cried most of the time she was awake, slept terribly and only did so in my arms I am now enjoying a more happy cooing, smiling, sleeping better baby. It has made a big difference but she still has some good days and some bad days. Things still seem to bother her at times. It also doesn't help that she is fighting a cold right now. In the midst of the difficulty 4 weeks from her birth she stared smiling real, true, responsive smiles. Those smiles were what held me together and gave me hope that even though she was crying and in pain she was ok and content enough to smile. That is the hardest part as a mom of a crying baby is feeling like you are failing in bringing comfort to your baby. I held things together pretty well but when you have so much to do (with three other kids) and all your time is spent taking care of your baby it is hard not to get overwhelmed. On a day where I didn’t think I could take it anymore fervent prayers were offered and were answered very quickly. That is when things started to change. I am so grateful for that and it’s another testament to me that Heavenly Father hears our prayers and knows the extent of what we can handle. And even through the difficulty Heavenly Father was there through the service of my amazing friends. I had more meals brought to me then I did with all the other girls combined. I also had many friends randomly bring me lunch, treats, bring a gift by or just call to check on me. I sometimes wonder how I have been blessed with so many thoughtful people in my life. I really am so grateful for their love and service. As hard as things have been, I think about how much harder things would have been without the amazing people in my life and I am not sure I would have made it through with out them. Brad has been the biggest and best supporter and helper of them all. He is a pretty amazing husband and dad. He has stepped up and has taken over a lot of my normal responsibilities so that I can mainly focus on Henley. He has been a great comfort to me also and given me the encouragement I have needed. Once again, I am one lucky lady.
I don't want it to seem like it hasn't also been a great time because it has. We all love having Henley here and the girls are so sweet and helpful with her. They love her to pieces and always want to hold her and talk about her. Ayden is great at holding her when I need her to and she has calmed her down many times and gotten her to sleep many times also. So much of me doesn't want Henley to grow up because there is something so sweet about a newborn baby and she is the last for our family. I want to soak it all up because I know how quickly time flies by.
There is a reason it took me 7 weeks to do a blog post and that is because she hasn’t been the easiest baby and other circumstances have made things a little hard but I am grateful that through it I have still been able to enjoy her and her sweet spirit and love every moment with her. Between all the girls we have dealt with colds, the stomach flu, ear infections, allergies, thrush, yeast rash and more over and over again all since she was born. It seems it has all been thrown at once. Not to mention she was born the day before school started and the beginning of a new school year is always crazy. Henley has colic as some would call it and after about a week and a half she started crying all the time and not sleeping well. With the help of acid reflux medication and the lack of dairy in my diet she has become a different baby in the last week. When before most of my time was spent rocking, bouncing and trying to sooth a baby who cried most of the time she was awake, slept terribly and only did so in my arms I am now enjoying a more happy cooing, smiling, sleeping better baby. It has made a big difference but she still has some good days and some bad days. Things still seem to bother her at times. It also doesn't help that she is fighting a cold right now. In the midst of the difficulty 4 weeks from her birth she stared smiling real, true, responsive smiles. Those smiles were what held me together and gave me hope that even though she was crying and in pain she was ok and content enough to smile. That is the hardest part as a mom of a crying baby is feeling like you are failing in bringing comfort to your baby. I held things together pretty well but when you have so much to do (with three other kids) and all your time is spent taking care of your baby it is hard not to get overwhelmed. On a day where I didn’t think I could take it anymore fervent prayers were offered and were answered very quickly. That is when things started to change. I am so grateful for that and it’s another testament to me that Heavenly Father hears our prayers and knows the extent of what we can handle. And even through the difficulty Heavenly Father was there through the service of my amazing friends. I had more meals brought to me then I did with all the other girls combined. I also had many friends randomly bring me lunch, treats, bring a gift by or just call to check on me. I sometimes wonder how I have been blessed with so many thoughtful people in my life. I really am so grateful for their love and service. As hard as things have been, I think about how much harder things would have been without the amazing people in my life and I am not sure I would have made it through with out them. Brad has been the biggest and best supporter and helper of them all. He is a pretty amazing husband and dad. He has stepped up and has taken over a lot of my normal responsibilities so that I can mainly focus on Henley. He has been a great comfort to me also and given me the encouragement I have needed. Once again, I am one lucky lady.
I don't want it to seem like it hasn't also been a great time because it has. We all love having Henley here and the girls are so sweet and helpful with her. They love her to pieces and always want to hold her and talk about her. Ayden is great at holding her when I need her to and she has calmed her down many times and gotten her to sleep many times also. So much of me doesn't want Henley to grow up because there is something so sweet about a newborn baby and she is the last for our family. I want to soak it all up because I know how quickly time flies by.
Laboring in my "cat-like" mode as Brad calls it.
The delivery went well and I am grateful for modern medicine that allows me to deliver a healthy baby and be safe myself. My doctor has become a pro with my ITP and knows exactly what to do and how my body will respond. It made this 4th time pretty chill without much worry. Everything went off as planned and I had an amazing nurse who was very on top of things and took care of everything she needed to when she needed to as the timing of the transfusions is important.
Brad kept a little journal of notes throughout the labor as he has with all of them. Thanks to his notes I can write the labor with some good detail.
We got to the hospital at 6:30 a.m. After learning from a friend that the fetal and contraction monitors are not a requirement I went in with two requests for the nurse. One being I didn't want to wear the monitors and two that I never wanted her to mention the pain chart since they couldn't do anything about my pain anyway. I didn't want pain mentioned. Well, she let me know that in a normal natural labor the monitors are not required but when an induction with pitocin is involved they are, so she could not allow that request but she was happy to never mention pain or the pain chart. I really hate the monitors because they are uncomfortable, they make it harder to move around and they are always having to reposition them and it makes it harder for me to relax so I had to mentally get tough and tell myself it was going to be okay and I could deal with the monitors as I have every time. Luckily she went and snagged the computer that could operate without being plugged in so I could walk around.
My doctor came in at 7:15. I was dilated to a 1 1/2 and he broke my water at 7:20. He gave the platelet transfusion instructions to the nurse and left. Brad and I walked around the little circle hallway in labor and delivery over and over for the next two hours. I was hoping it would speed things up and get things going faster then the other labors because I didn't have the remote computer and couldn't walk around outside of my room with the other ones. As the contractions got harder we would stop and breath through them and then move on. Brad was quite the trooper as I know he was getting pretty board walking around the same hallway for two hours but he was all smiles telling me how amazing I was and how beautiful I was and supporting me during contractions. He has really figured out how to be the perfect laboring partner. A little trick I learned from hypnobirthing (which as a whole I didn't really agree with) was to expand your stomach with air during a contraction and it would be less painful and it really did work during the early contractions. They got to a point where that didn't work anymore mostly when my back labor started. At 10:40 the nurse checked me again and I was a 3. My contractions became much more painful and were about 2 min apart for the rest of the labor. At 11:30 I was a 3 1/2. I was a little bummed to have so little progress for how much pain I was in. My back labor kicked in accompanied by a terrible sensation to go to the bathroom (#2) that was very intense during contractions. Between the contractions, back labor contractions and this awful sensation things were getting really tough. I kept telling myself it wasn't something I hadn't gotten through before and that the more pain I got in meant the closer I was to holding my sweet baby. The thought of holding that baby at the end is certainly amazing motivation. She checked me at 12:30 and I was a 4. She said the baby had dropped and the position she was in was causing the back labor and the nasty bathroom sensation. Things started moving quickly and at 1:00 I was a strong 5. Brad wrote in his book "this is where it starts to get going." As we have learned from other labors once I hit a 5 things move quickly. At 1:10 the nurse starts administering the platelets. Brad wrote "back labor is intense. I put pressure on Jenni's back during contractions and a couple times I felt a kick from the baby. I feel bad. I have only gotten fussed at twice" He wrote "1:36 platelet transfusion almost complete. Jenni is now in "I'm a cat" mode, I got fussed at two more times. Kim showed up at 1:35. Jenni is still in catlike mode, hanging in there. 1:53- Dr showed up and she is measured at a 9!!! She is getting close.
Baby Henley is born at 2:06 p.m.! Only had to push three times.
(My nurse told me she would have been here 2 hours earlier if I didn't have back labor, darn back labor!)
Brad said that I fussed at him but really most of those little fusses are me just trying to say what I need or want in as little effort as possible. "Brad, now!" meaning I am having a contaction and need pressure on my back. I remember the only time I was a little annoyed was when he asked me if the girls could go to a certain movie with my dad. He was concerned I would think it was too scary for them. I think I just said "I couldn't care less about that right now" in not a very nice tone. I really couldn't. All my energy was focused on staying alive (hey, that is what it feels like) and getting through what I was going through. My other kids could be scared out of their minds and I didn't have the energy to worry about it. :) In reality, Brad was amazing. He was so great throughout the whole day. He knows what I need during labor and does a great job being loving and kind and supportive. He did a lot of light touch messaging and hair playing, and putting music on for me and telling me how great I was doing and how beautiful I am. I was tempted to pay a Dula this time but decided it wasn't worth the $900. I'm glad I didn't because Brad was really all I needed. I love you Bradly.
As Brad mentioned I seem to put myself in another state as I try to endure the contractions and relax as my body can do its job. I read the Bradley Method book once where he talks about how animals, especially cats, labor and they look like they are asleep and relax the whole time. That is why Brad calls it "I'm a cat mode. Silly man. He also mentioned that Kim came. She was so super sweet to come and record the labor/delivery with her amazing photography. I was zoned out when she came in but still knowing she was there was helpful to me and I am so grateful for the pictures she took and that she could be a part of the special moment. I am grateful for our close friendship and that she is someone I feel completely comfortable with to share those special moments with us. She also saw a part of me that day she had never seen in the 7 years we have been friends and in more then one way if you know what I mean! :) I love you Kim! Thanks for coming and taking these pictures that I will always cherish.
My first moments with Henley. She came out very, very purple. These pictures are after she got some color in her face. She had quite a cone head also. That painful posterior position she was in that was causing me all the pain was also putting a lot of pressure on one part of her head and she had a large hematoma which eventually hardened and now looks like a little horn on her head. It will eventually go away. Her face and arm also had some bruising. Poor baby, labor is rough on all of us!
Kim also came and took some pictures when she was 4 days old. Kim is the best!
Henley and my momma.
A big thank you to my parents who came to be with the other girls, take care of me, cook meals and clean the house. The girls love their grandparents so much ( I do too!) and I am so grateful they could come and help. It was a crazy time as the girls started school and Laela was sick with a 104 fever and terrible cough and I certainly couldn't have done it without them. They also took Ayden and Alex back home with them so Brad and I enjoyed the weekend after Henley was born with only Henley and Laela. It really made things nice. They are so great!
