genuinely curious why you have so many haters because you seem pretty chill to me. unless they're just trolling or something
It's not trolling. They want me dead in the gutters.
im a fan and i also want that
I understand.
Baby saiga being nestled in the hands of a scientist.
The first one is the distraction.
My genius remains unrealised
Every so often this gets another wave of notes, and I will mention “Ah, my snost is getting snotes.”
Hi my name is Snebony (Snail Ebony) Snark'ness (Snail Dark'ness) Snementia (Snail Dementia) Snaven (Snail Raven) Snay (Snail Way) and I have an ebony black shell (that’s how I got my name) with purple streaks and red spots and long eyestalks like goth spaghetti and a lot of people tell me I look like Snamy Snee (Snail Amy Lee) (AN: if u dont kno who dat iz get da hell out of here!!!!!). I’m not related to Snerard Snay (Snail Gerard Way) but I wish I was because he’s a major fucking snottie (snail hottie). I’m a vampire but my radula is a normal snail radula. I’m also a snail, and I go to a magic snool (snail school) in Snengland (Snail England) called Snogwarts (Snail Hogwarts) where I’m in the sneventh year (I’m sneventeen). I’m a snoth (snail goth) (in case you couldn’t tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Snot Stopic (Snail Hot Topic) and I buy all my snothes (snail clothes) from there. For instance today I was wearing a black shell with silver snikes (snail spikes) and black eyeliner and white foundation. I was snalking (snail walking) outside Snogwarts. It was snowing and raining at the same time, so I tried to find snelter (snail shelter) so I wouldn’t get washed away. A lot of sneps (snail preps) stared at me. I put up my eyestalks at them.
House is pregnant
good for him!!!!
it was a baby girl! what should he name her?
all VERY good suggestions!
quite literally me when i am lying
transcript:
woman: why are the heard and mcdonald islands, which don't export to the united states, and are quite literally inhabited by penguins -- why do they face 10% tariffs? did you use AI to generate this?
man: [extremely nervous and suspicious laughter] ehehehe..... no.....
i think about this a hundred times a day
my cat is so fucking stupid every time i get out of the shower he's so happy to see me he jumps on my bathroom laundry hamper (wheeled. it has wheels.) and he rubs himself on the closest available surface (the wall) and he doesnt understand physics because hes dumb so you'll never guess what happens
artistic recreation
Your quality of life will increase ten-fold when you learn to appreciate the sight of a little bird
i wish there was an easier way to tell the difference between an "if it sucks hit da bricks" situation and a "sometimes being an adult means doing things that you dont wanna" situation
The best answer to this that I've seen is "You are free to do whatever you like. You must only live with the consequences."
"If it sucks, hit da bricks" is for when you realize that you actually definitely can live with the consequences of Not Doing The Thing.
"Sometimes being an adult means doing things that you don't wanna" is for when you've thought it over and it turns out you would strongly prefer NOT to live with the consequences of Not Doing The Thing.
being obsessed with a character is so fucking embarrassing like I'll be getting dressed in the morning like "I bet the 12th doctor would wear these socks" bitch shut the fuck up
some of you MUST be making up guys.
The concept of Bertie Wooster being some obscure character akin to an early, forgotten member of a rock band is genuinely breaking my brain
me impatiently to the little french cat boiling me in a stew: chat am I cooked
