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The Monkey 2025
the best and (surprisingly) least-confusing thing about this is how Severance-coded this is - the literal only fun I had in this entire thing was whenever something came up in the narrative that was shared between universes (Adam Scott 😍). Unbelievable drag otherwise. There are like 5 kills in this entire thing and they all rely on one terribly-executed exploding-corpse visual effect, sickeningly painted onto the set-pieces that are lit like Jack Daniels commercials. The 97-minute running time would be…
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nothing, except everything. 2023
Infuriating. Such a vapid and artless film that had me bracing for impact every few seconds because I thought that one of the characters was going to turn to the camera and say some shit like "level 3 gyatt prestige dillon danis to the rizzler on nick eh 30 looksmaxxing challenge." The messaging falls entirely flat because of the muddled non-story not having all too much coherence or being at all interesting, with the script focusing entirely on forcing in…
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