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Terminator Salvation 2009
This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.
Terminator 2 lied. Judgment day happened.
Batman has to fight terminators. Someone who isn't Arnie is now a terminator but doesn't realize he is a terminator even though everyone else on planet earth who saw the trailer knows he is a terminator, because it was spoiled....in the trailer.
At one point a plastic Arnie shows up and fights Batman. Batman wins and finds a time travel machine. Batman thinks about sending someone back in time to make sure no more Terminator movies get made.
Batman fails.
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End of Days 1999
Apparently God was busy somewhere else and asked Arnie to step in and fight Satan. Arnie agrees, even though he JUST had a heart-attack.
Arnie fights Satan to save the humans.
Arnie wins...but is not resurrected...
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Terminator Genisys 2015
Arnie is a robot from a future that no longer exists in a past the takes place in the timeline of another future were Judgment day may or may not happen because of a time Arnie traveled back in to the past to save a different kid who no longer matters cause that kid is dead and is now the bad guy from the future Arnie was trying to prevent.
Arnies wins (the cash he was paid).
America loses.
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Red Heat 1988
Arnie goes undercover as a Russian bath house attendant and is then asked to go to America. He goes to America and is forced to put up with an overweight dog trainer. The dog trainer is always telling Arnie it's wrong to kill people. This makes Arnie sad so he kills people and feels better.
Arnie wins.
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