Favorite films

Recent reviews

• 

  Ghost in the Shell 2017

  ★★½ Watched 14 Jul 2017

  "Why ain't she got nipples or a vag?"

  "'Cause she's a robot, she don't need 'em."

  "She's got an arse though. Why she got THAT?"

  "..."

  "Did YOU build her?"

  I love my friends but sometimes they can fuck right off. 

  This movie's a fuckin' MESS man. I mean it's a PRETTY mess. Well most of the time, sometimes it looks dirt cheap like they knew they 'ad impressive shit they needed to make later an' picked their battles, but…

• 

  21 2008

  ★★½ Watched 04 Jul 2017

  How can anybody take a story this interestin' and make a movie so fuckin' BEIGE?

  Half-a-star for Kevin Spacey, who adds half-a-star to anything just by takin' a piss next to it. Another for Lawrence Fishburne's accent never quite soundin' like it's comin' out of his face.

Popular reviews

• 

  Mars Attacks! 1996

  ★★★★ Rewatched 29 Oct 2012 10

  It's like Independence Day if it shit itself.

• 

  Detention 2011

  ★★★★½ Watched 24 Feb 2013 18

  For the first fifteen minutes it's unwatchable. I mean properly. It's almost like some sort of endurance test. "Think you're tough, do you? Think you're HARD? BAM, THE MOST ANNOYING OPENING TO A MOVIE, EVER." It's just a barrage of bleating and overly-cute camera work and annoying, annoying, ANNOYING characters. I was this close to turning it off. I had the remote in my hand at least twice.

  But then something happens. It's hard to describe. It's like the movie…