Favorite films

Recent reviews

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  The Substance 2024

  ★★★½ Watched 09 Feb 2025

  Girlhood is a spectrum, actually.

  Being beautiful is really terrible, and painful, and expensive. Being beautiful involves countless hours of criticizing your appearance, finding flaws, finding too many flaws, oh my god everything is a flaw I'm a monster, etc. Most importantly- being beautiful involves being young. You've got enough here, thematically and narrative-wise, to make a film. I turn 35 on Saturday, and as a woman I'm probably the target audience for this kind of thing: I've lived life,…

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  John Wick 2014

  ★★★★★ Watched 27 Jan 2025

  I've been reviewing movies for the past twelve years. Why do I write movie reviews? I guess because I enjoy talking about movies so much. I worked in a twenty screen multiplex in the early 2010's- a vast paradise of retro carpeted auditoriums, located in the middle of the suburbs. My job was to clean movie theaters, and yeah, there were twenty of them, but our staff was large enough that I had plenty of time to get lost. I…

Popular reviews

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  Bride & Prejudice 2004

  ★★★★★ Added 4

  my power is out and I'm bored and I need all of you to understand that this is the best Pride & Prejudice adaptation ever made

  - BOLLYWOOD
  - director of Bend it Like Beckham
  - the songs are just incredible
  - high class camp all the time

  like I am beyond here for Colin Firth in the wet shirt, climbing out of a lake like a sexy sea monster, but give me that deconstructivist racial commentary with my Austen

  UPDATE…

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  Spy Kids 2001

  ★★★★★ Added 6

  problematic opinion of the day: none of Y'all "get" Robert Rodriguez