Favorite films

Pinned reviews

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  Friday the 13th: The Final Chapter 1984

  ★★★★★ Rewatched 13 Oct 2023 1

  What happened to Gordon the Golden Retriever, a fan fiction

  Last scene:
  Gordon runs upstairs and jumps through the second-story window.

  Fanfic:
  GORDON sticks the landing and trots away from the house.

  GORDON: Ruff ruff, woof [loosely translates to: Fuck this, I'm out.]

  GORDON walks along the familiar path he takes to see his girlfriend, a stray black lab named ISABELLE. They sniff each other's genitals and ISABELLE immediately understands that GORDON ain't fuckin' with JASON or the JARVIS FAMILY…

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  Reality 2014

  ★★★★½ Watched 05 Apr 2020 2

  Christopher Nolan retire bitch

Recent reviews

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  Sing Sing 2023

  ★★★★ Watched 22 Mar 2025

  I took a handful of drama classes in high school and college. Can confirm that the "exercises" are the cringiest moments of your life, but anyone worth a shit in the class excelled in them. I was not one of them!

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  Drive 2011

  ★★★★½ Rewatched 21 Mar 2025

  Ten-plus years later and maybe the jacket is the only thing that hasn't really stood the test of time.

Popular reviews

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  Barbarian 2022

  ★ Watched 08 Sep 2022 2

  Whoever said this is the "scariest movie since Hereditary" can fuck right off.

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  I'll Be Gone in the Dark 2020

  ★★½ Watched 03 Aug 2020

  The strength of the Golden State Killer's surviving victims is so inspiring. I'm pretty sure I would crumple into nothing under those circumstances, yet these women survived, fought and often thrived. 

  The show falters, tho, when it becomes hyper-focused on Michelle McNamara and buys into the ridiculous narrative that she is somehow GSK's victim as well. She was an otherwise great writer and talented amateur investigator, there's no need to force a hero on us, especially one who didn't contribute…