Kyle

Kyle Patron

God gives his shittiest horror movies to his most dedicated horror fans

Favorite films

  • The Thing
  • Mad Max: Fury Road
  • The Rocky Horror Picture Show
  • Saw

Recent activity

All
  • Death of a Unicorn

    ★★★

  • Locked

    ★★★

  • Terrifier 3

    ★★★

  • Novocaine

    ★★★½

Recent reviews

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  • Death of a Unicorn

    Death of a Unicorn

    ★★★

    The Paulssion of the Rudd. 

    This movie is fine, but it isn’t doing anything new. A lot of what it says environmentally was said better in Mickey 17, and the father daughter stuff has been done better in a hundred different movies. The CGI is also a little weird at times and it feels slow at certain parts, and Paul Rudd gives a weirdly flat performance. That being said, the gore is solid and Will Poulter is genuinely really funny, so it’s not a complete wash

  • Locked

    Locked

    ★★★

    Absolutely nothing special about this one. It’s not great, it’s not bad. I’m glad Bill Skarsgard gets to play both a lead and a normal guy, and Anthony Hopkins is having fun as “We have Jigsaw at home”. This probably makes for a pretty good plane movie

Popular reviews

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  • Oppenheimer

    Oppenheimer

    ★★★★½

    Introducing JFK like a Marvel post-credits scene character was a little much, but god damn Nolan just does not miss

  • Opus

    Opus

    ★★★

    This would be a perfectly fine cult horror/thriller if The Menu did not exist, but it does, so comparisons are inevitably drawn. Malkovich gives a good performance, but simply cannot stand up to Ralph Fiennes. I appreciate the attempt to strike a different tone by going straight horror instead of a dark comedy, but a lot of the tension is drained by an ending that ends up feeling super rushed and out of nowhere. That being said, this is very well shot, Ayo Edebiri is a solid lead, and Amber Midthunder is an imposing secondary antagonist.

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