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Borderlands 2024
I genuinely hated this movie with every fiber of my being, there is not a single redeemable quality about it. The casting is questionable, the writing isn't just weak it's embarrassing, CGI is so bad it's beyond laughable, and the acting is atrocious. I don't even have the energy to attempt to write something slightly funny, I just vehemently abhor this sorry excuse of a movie and absolute shit stain on the borderlands name. Fuck I'm so MAD
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Terrifier 3 2024
It's clear each instalment of Terrifier has a slightly better budget and better pacing than the last because this didn't feel like a two hour movie (as in it didn't feel like it ran for too long).
Terrifier 3 opens rather strongly and is full of yet more creative practical effects-fuelled dismemberment and gore that has you giggling (somewhat uncomfortably) through graphic scenes of genital violence and other comedic horror. There's a loose story that's decently cheesy enough to keep you interested, and a few classic "bad horror" decisions from protagonists that's chsrmingly on the nose.
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Terrifier 2 2022
Well it's certainly a slasher, folks be getting slashed left right and centre. Also Art the Clown's cheeky little facial expressions in the midst of - dare I say, Terrifying - situations never ceased to make me laugh. Could've been at least 30 minutes shorter though, someone please get an editor on the production team.
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Eyes Wide Shut 1999
"Woah, this is like some sorta cult!" I exclaimed, as it unfolded that there was a sex cult on screen.
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