wip wednesday

thank you @heartstringsduet @paperstorm @carlossreaders @whatsintheboxmh @strandnreyes @carlos-in-glasses @nisbanisba for the tags <3

hoping to finish up my second 5x09 coda very soon so here's a bit of that

Carlos bites his lip and squeezes his eyes shut against the pressure of holding back tears. He’s worrying his husband. He knows that. He’s worried TK too much for one lifetime. But he’s sore and kind of cold and somehow doesn’t feel better – if anything, the overwhelming sense of stupid that’s colored over everything has just made him feel worse. 

He worked with that man for a year. Updated him with his theories of who could’ve been responsible, what to investigate, and all the while…

“Hey. Baby, hey. You’re okay,” TK murmurs. “Everything’s gonna be okay.”

Carlos wants so badly to believe him.

There’s rustling, and more sounds of movement, and before Carlos has a chance to say anything, TK is climbing up and onto the bed, shifting onto his side and squeezing himself into the small space between the bed’s railing and Carlos’s body. Carlos scoots over to the other side of the bed to give him some more room as TK winds an arm around his back and curls his fingers around his side.

“I’m sorry,” he finally manages, and knows immediately it was the wrong thing to say when TK’s face falls.

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” TK says firmly, hands coming up to cup the sides of Carlos’s face again. He leans in and presses his lips to Carlos’s. Carlos kisses back with probably more force than the moment warrants, but he can’t help it. This feels like the only thing he can do right, right now.

open tag

thanks @ladyknight1512 @heartstringsduet @paperstorm @whatsintheboxmh @carlossreaders !!

“Hey, I saw you run in here, are you sick?” Carlos startles at the sound of TK’s voice. “Carlos?”

It’s too late to stop this from happening. TK rounds the corner, and Carlos doesn’t have time to wipe his cheeks before TK catches his expression in the mirror. TK’s face instantly crumples and he rushes over, locking his arms tightly around Carlos’ waist and plastering himself to his back.

“Hey. Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay,” he whispers, kissing Carlos’ shoulder. Carlos wants to tell him to never put his lips on his scrubs, but the gesture is so comforting and sweet that he can’t be bothered to. “You’re okay, baby. Shh.”

Carlos lets out another pathetic whimper and then finally scrubs at his face.

“Does this have anything to do with the yelling I heard?” TK asks quietly, and Carlos nods solemnly.

He maneuvers himself in TK’s grasp. He doesn’t want to get caught like this, but he can’t imagine asking TK to let go. Instead, he spins around so his back is to the counter and TK’s hands are still resting on his waist. For some reason, as Carlos’ eyes search for somewhere to land that isn’t TK’s own eyes, he finds TK’s badge.

The picture on there is dated. At least five years old, maybe more. It could be from when he first started here at 20 years old. TK told him about how he worked on an ambulance first and became more and more interested in what happens with patients once they drop them off at the door. In the picture, he’s bright-eyed and smiling wide. His hair is a little longer, curling just behind his ears, and his features are younger. He looks eager. Excited. Carlos wonders if the reality of this environment has dimmed that spark he wears on his chest.

tagging @orchidscript @ironheartwriter @tellmegoodbye @thisbuildinghasfeelings @theghostofashton @reyesstrand @rmd-writes @emsprovisions @welcometololaland @alrightbuckaroo @freneticfloetry @henrygrass @lightningboltreader @liminalmemories21 @neversleepuntilfive @basilsunrise @bonheur-cafe @butchreyes @chicgeekgirl89 @carlos-in-glasses @carlos-tk + open tag!!

Thanks for the tags @heartstringsduet and @ladyknight1512! 😘

Missing Moments Season 4 is officially in progress :)

“There just … never seemed to be a good time.”

Even to his own ears, it sounds like such a pitiful excuse. TK’s told him so many painful things, been so open with him about dark parts of his past and the things he continues to struggle with, and Carlos wanted that. Demanded it, at times. Told TK there wasn’t anything he couldn’t share, that Carlos wanted all his secrets, that Carlos didn’t know what his place was in TK’s life if TK wasn’t willing to split himself open and let Carlos see inside. He’s such a hypocrite, and he knew that all along somewhere way in the back of his mind but he got so good at compartmentalizing everything that Carlos never quite realized how unfair he’s been until this very moment.

“We’ve been together for three years,” TK points out quietly.

“I know.” Carlos rubs his hands over his face.

“You couldn’t find 10 minutes for this conversation in three years?”

“Not, it’s not that, either.” Shaking his head and feeling sicker, Carlos explains, “When we first met, I really thought she was dead. And I found out she wasn’t the same week you and I made the choice to become something real after months of me pining after you like some lovesick idiot.”

That makes TK smile, just a little bit. “You weren’t an idiot.”

“I was. I was so completely gone on you. I’d already made my peace with Iris being gone, years earlier. And then suddenly she wasn’t, and I didn’t have any idea how to have that conversation. ‘Thanks for agreeing to be my boyfriend, by the way it turns out I’m still technically married since my missing wife just turned up alive’. It would’ve sounded insane.”

“Yeah,” TK agrees. “It would’ve.”

“I didn’t want to scare you off or think about what it would all mean for you and me. I just wanted you. I wanted to be an us, I’d wanted that for weeks and you finally wanted it too and that made everything else seem so unimportant.”

TK looks at him. There’s a shine in his eyes that Carlos can’t quite place, he feels as if he’s under burning interrogation lights even though he’s sitting in their living room with TK only feet away on their couch. If TK was furious, Carlos thinks he'd know how to handle that. But this quiet disappointment might just eat him alive.

With a slow exhale, TK turns. He puts his arm up onto the back of the couch cushion, resting his head in his hand. In a soft voice, he says, “Go on.”

Carlos looks down at his own hands, folded in his lap. He searches back in his brain, tries to piece together a timeline of everything they’ve been through in the last three years. “Michelle told me I'd done enough. She asked if Iris could keep using my health insurance so they could get her on the right medication and I agreed, and then she hugged me and told me to go live my life. And then Covid shut everything down, and your mom was here, and you and Nancy and Captain Vega were kidnapped and your dad and I were looking for you, and then my parents knew about us and that whole thing was hard for me, and then the fire, and then we broke up, and then I had you back, and then Sadie, and …”

He gasps, running out of breath all at once.

TK sighs again. “We have been through a lot of crazy shit.”

Looking back at him with his eyes stinging, Carlos implores, “It’s not like I was thinking about it all the time. I guess it was always there deep down, but most of the time it wasn’t even on my mind. It’s not like I was waking up every day and making the knowing choice to lie to you, I just … I didn’t know how to process it, when she turned up alive. So I pushed it away. Figured I’d deal with it later, and then a good time never came along.”

TK nods slowly.

“And then …” Carlos’s voice cracks; a tear slips free and he wipes it quickly away. “And then you asked me to marry you. In the middle of the night like you couldn’t wait another second. Like you loved me so much you couldn’t stand not being engaged to me for one minute longer.”

“That’s exactly why,” TK confirms, with tears in his own eyes.

Carlos nods, sniffing and not bothering, this time, to scrub away the water that drip down his cheeks. “And I was so completely in love with you in that moment that it didn’t even occur to me until the next morning. I was lying in bed thinking about how badly I’d fucked up, and then you woke up and you were so happy, and I just … I didn’t know how to tell you. I didn’t want to let you down.”

TK’s eyes shine and he moves in closer on the couch. A wretched sob rips from Carlos’s throat and suddenly TK is in his lap, holding his damp cheeks and kissing the tears off his face. “Okay,” he’s murmuring. “It’s okay.”

“Please still want to marry me,” Carlos whispers, grasping at desperate handfuls of TK’s shirt.

“Baby. I do,” TK swears, peppering kisses all over his face. “That’s all I want. To spend the rest of my life with you.”

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WIP Wednesday

It's Wednesday, which means it's time for another look at the Tarlos vampire fic.

Carlos ducks one dagger and then the other. He was doing this on autopilot not even two weeks ago, but now his legs wobble as he straightens and a jolt of fear shoots through him. He’s weak and tired, and it’s his own fault because he hasn’t been eating, and now TK might die. He can’t let that happen.

The vampire jabs a dagger towards his stomach and Carlos knocks its arm away with his right wrist. He grabs the elbow with his free hand and pushes its arm out, driving his stake into the vampire’s side. The vampire roars, wrenching its arm free and swinging its dagger back towards him. It slices into Carlos’s arm as he spins away but it’s barely worth the notice right now.

He drives in towards the vampire’s back, stake raised to thrust into its heart, but the vampire elbows him in the stomach and knocks the wind out of him. 

“Carlos!” 

TK’s voice is high and sharp with worry, and he wants to tell him that he’s okay, but he’s still fighting to get a breath in so he can speak. Before he can, something whizzes past his head and embeds itself in the vampire’s heart: one of TK’s silver-tipped crossbow bolts. Not even a second later, TK cries out in pain and Carlos stumbles as he turns to see what’s happened. His vision narrows on the dagger sticking out of the front of TK’s left shoulder and he sees red as the scent of fresh blood blossoms in the cool night air.

Tagging: @thisbuildinghasfeelings @strandnreyes @welcometololaland @rmd-writes @ironheartwriter @paperstorm @heartstringsduet @lemonlyman-dot-com

Tarlos + romantic dinners at home
9-1-1 : LONE STAR

People don't get Tarlos like us. You think they're going to be a hot, cool firefighter-police officer couple (they makeout/French kiss in episode 2), and then they gift Owen a 500 pc puzzle of dogs playing poker and are on a strict-routine of eating 6 times a day and weekly Catan nights hosted for their friends. Respectfully, they're a lame old married couple before they're even married....who also happen to be hot.

ugh i'm so mad i'm going to go home and touch my husband's tits so i won't be mad