“You learn something new every day” factoid actually just statistical error. Curious Georg,

happy out for a walk bitch day to those who celebrate

I don’t like being referred to as a boy

Woah mama I'll give anyone who misgenders you the Elvis Special (a bullet)

This account likely makes the list of “the last accounts I’d ever expect to be anywhere near my blog” but I appreciate it

Woah mama I'm one of your mutuals

WHAT

this is killing me

anyone can be a girlboss but it takes a real woman to be a deadbeat dad

this post is about women. 1000 deaths on whoever said remus lupin

big fan of characters with abandonment + attachment issues so profound that they leave claw marks in everything they touch but would sooner gnaw off their own leg than admit they just want someone to stay for once. in a totally normal well adjusted and not at all projecting way of course.

Ppl on the Disco Elysium subreddit are going crazy after the mobile game was announced

DND character who accidentally becomes a paladin at their wedding bc they meant their wedding vows a little too hard and invents the Oath of Love subclass. Is this anything

People reblogging this with "this is just oath of devotion" no. Wrong. Oath of Devotion is an inherently lawful good oath devoted to the ideals of classical chivalry. It is an oath to serve all of the weak and defenseless in need of protection.

This is an idea I came up with after reading abt Oath of the Crown and realizing paladins don't have to be dedicated to ideals and ideals alone. That you can swear fealty to a mortal individual and still receive paladin powers from the strength of your conviction alone. This is about loving someone so much that the universe is forced to bend to the sheer force of your love, the fierceness of your vows as you speak them at a ceremony that you did not expect to gain anything from except the lawful right to remain at your beloved's side.

Some genuine "true love" bs that blurs the line between a paladin oath and a warlock pact. No alignment required you can be as evil or deceitful as you want to everyone else so long as all of your actions are out of pure, faithful, and honest love to your one person and that person only. Wifeguy hours taken to the farthest possible extreme of the new 5e paladin lore rules to result in accidental powers.

The Warlock + Paladin pair.

Pact/Oath of the Spouse.

this line delivery has lived in my head for 10 years

Just One Guy, Just One Spider-Man… -OR Woman?!? We don’t Know… forsure…..

it. it ends in 50 years…..horse is fucking eternal

Let’s keep the post circulating for 50 years it’ll be great when we’re all in the old folks home

TAYLOR WANT SHEET METAL

HAPPY MANWHORE MONDAY

that muppet post reminded me, most if not all of the main muppets have twitter pages. Fav has gotta be Miss Piggys, which is filled with selfies and vaguely uplifting text thats also egocentric. all the comments are people complimenting her and being like “YAS QUEEN”

Close second is Gonzos. Which is just…unhinged

Now that the pilot’s out…