i remember when i was a child internet safety was like "if you even hint at the country you live in, you're gonna get kidnapped and murdered", and nowadays it is encouraged or even necessary to give corporations every single personal detail if you want to use anything because if they can't sell your information they cry so hard they throw up

my phone isn’t charging even though i plugged her innnnn dramatic ass bitch. YOUR PUSSY IS FILLED! WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT

Can you stop bouncing and moaning on it 😐 please for the love of god

i see now that i shouldn’t have made this post on tumblr. specifically.

ill spend my twenties investigating the healing properties of salt i dont know about you guys

excuse me

Sorry op. That's my friend the Salt Vampire from the Star Trek episode "The Man Trap" which first aired in 1966. Blessings be upon you.

its just i dont feel blessed by its presence is all. sending love your way

Just me?

family

I made this awhile ago before I got some weird virus. long story short, please pray for my family, we all feel really crummy. anyways, Happy holidays!

just remembered shows used to have 20-25 eps per season

if you imagine an animatic hard enough it should come true

Philadelphians refilling the earths core with Cheez Whiz during the Great Cheez Whiz shortage of 1912

Get DRINKED (don't tell the Philadelphians)

i will never, and i mean this, Ever buy a video game for 80 american dollars. this is a core part of my being. i will not be moved from this position

It's so weird to me when people are like 'but that will cost the government money!' So what? They're the government, they're supposed to be spending money. What, you want them to take your tax dollars and then do nothing with it? Lock it all up in a big government vault and just look at it? Why are you so scared of giving a third grader lunch or a homeless person a house.

by the way i'm the reason why they send weathermen into hurricanes and shit. "it's needless and dangerous!!!!!" i don't care. every day i call into CNN and demand they send their most pathetic newscaster into a storm to watch them be knocked down by wave and wind and they sigh and say yes ma'am. and i do this all for nasty, sexual purposes, if you were wondering.

my favorite part of this post is people started tagging it with names of characters i've never heard of so i got curious and googled them and like a third are just tagging it as their local weatherman. very funny.

*offers you two princes*

For those of you that may have just finished watching Cory Booker’s record-breaking senate speech and are inspired to “get in good trouble”, you have a great opportunity for it this Saturday!

On April 5th, numerous advocacy groups are banding together into one nation-wide rally that will be held in major cities all over the country - you can easily find a participating location here!

www.handsoff2025.com

I’ll be volunteering as a safety captain at my own local rally, and I encourage all of you to go out there too and get in some good trouble as well!

for the record when I say a lot of major cities I mean a LOT of major cities :P

I will be hitting up one of our Twin Cities rallies tomorrow representing the Great Lakes. Let's get out there and raise hell!

1272 protests listed for today. 686 were counted in the women's march in 2017, which was 1% of the population. 🎉

it’ll be fine I just have to be a shaking terrified animal about it