I’ve been listening to the people in the apartment below me have arguments for two years now and I still can’t figure out what language they’re speaking. The best I can narrow it down is like if Portuguese and Hebrew had a baby. Is that a common pidgin combination

I just listened to a clip of this and jesus christ you fucking got it. there are like 3500 people in the whole united states who speak this and two of them are in a very fraught marriage four feet below me

problematic XP gap relationship

they hate me for my ardent refusal to accept cruelty as the status quo

it’ll be fine I just have to be a shaking terrified animal about it

miserable that there is no way 2 avoid being treated as either a man or woman

enjoy some aspects of masculinity enjoy some aspects of femininity but i really don't want to be any of this shit

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no offense but um…..off with your head

dance till youre dead

i had a dream i worked in an underwater restaurant and people kept ordering ice in their drinks and then getting mad at me when it would float away. and i’d tell them beforehand that the ice would float away & they’d be like lol no that’s not how it works just give me the ice. I’m fighting customer service battles never seen before

people have been saying squidward on this all day but this is the first one that made me laugh

whoever made this made history's greatest called shot