Why try? (Part VII to Why me?)
azriel x rhys' sister! reader
angst/eventual comfort ( This one's a bit shorter, but I did try to jam-pack as much in here as possible so a lot does happen and we do have Azriel and the reader's official reunion and it goes just as well as you think it would!!)
Summary: When you walk in on Azriel and Elain the mating bond snaps leading you to flee to Autumn with Eris so you can be free of Azriel. Your absence causes Azriel to come to some drastic realisations, but is it already too late and has your time in Autumn led to you moving on?
-
The second you stepped through the floral arches of the Gardens of Velaris, you were immediately reminded of how much you had missed the Night Court while you were away. The Gardens of Velaris had been turned into a starlight-themed ball, flowers enchanted to twinkle like stars.
Before you could as so much as take it in, Feyre immediately spots you and runs up to you and brings you in to an all encompassing hug. Oh how you've missed your family.
Nesta followed immediately after and while she can be rather cold at times, this was not one of those times as she joined in on the hug. You knew Mor didn't join because you came with Eris and guilt settled in your stomach.
"We've missed you so much. Rhys hasn't been the same without you here he's been so grouchy lately." Feyre holds both of your hands in hers and excitedly rushes to tell you all about your family and while Nesta isn't as talkative, she also had her on quips about the time you were gone.
You looked at Eris while you're sisters in law whisked you away, and he gave you a nod signaling you to go with them. They led you to a table with a shimmering silver tablecloth covered with elaborate glass fountains of faerie wine. Arm in arm, the sisters took you down the table until you reached the last one. This one looked to be marble and in the shape of Ramiel with silver stars twinkling above it and next to it stood Mor and Amren. Mor with her signature smile, brown eyes lighting up in joy the second she sees you, and Amren with as much excitement as you could garner from them.
You immediately run into their arms. Mor squeezes you tight and Amren, much less enthusiastic begrudgingly allows you to hug her, you hadn't remembered the last time she had let you do something like this.
"I've missed you so much Mor." You had always been close to your cousin, she was a second sister to you when yours died and this was the longest you guys had been away from each other. You became overwhelmed from all the emotions, mostly good, of seeing your family again. Mor began to tear up and then Feyre began to tear up and seeing tears in both of their eyes made tears well up in your eyes and suddenly the three of you were crying in a group hug, dragging the other two into it.
Behind the fountain of wine stood Elain, skittish as a baby deer. You had months to get over her and Azriel besides she didn't know he was your mate. You harbour no ill will towards the Archeron sister and have actually missed the warmth of her company.
You look up at her, smile, and gesture for her to join in on the hug, "Elain bring it in." She meekishly approaches guilt and sorrow written across her features, "I would like to apologise for my actions. I would have never showed any interest in Azriel if I knew he was your mate. I can promise you that nothing serious happened-"
You cut her off before she could get the words out. "It's okay. Truly. I have missed you Elain." You tell her gently. Tears well up in her eyes and she joins in on the hug, as much of an emotional wreck as the rest of you.
You were trying to turn over a new leaf, one that is focused on you and not Azriel and to do that you had to let go of the bitterness you felt from the whole Azriel and Elain situation. Your anger and resentment that you held towards Azriel was not going to disappear soon, if ever, but you wouldn't blame Elain when she was just an innocent bystander to the trainwreck that is yours and Azriels mating bond.
Your guys' lovely bonding and crying session was ruined by a harsh gust of wind and a hard landing. You knew that sound anywhere that was the harsh landing of Illyrians. You could recognize the sound of Azriel, Cassian, and Rhys from a mile away. Their distinctive wingbeats and landing pattern, may be insignificant to most, but you could pinpoint exactly who landed and where.
-
Rhys has always acknowledged that Azriel possessed a certain lethal kind of brutality. It was the lethality of spies and assassins, the lethality of the shadows. The lethality that thrives in silence and creeps up on you, the kind that you won’t know it’s lethal until it’s too late. It’s the glass you’re holding all evening while laughing and dancing that you don’t realise is poisoned until you’re clutching at your throat hours later.
Azriel’s had always been brutal, he did torture people for a living, but his composure had always remained. His silence was the deafening kind. The silence of night, unseeing and terrifying because you never know where he is going to strike until your head is rolling on the floor and your body is on the ground.
Right now the Azriel that Rhys was currently fighting showed none of that. He was all sloppy movements and animalistic aggression, borderline growling at Rhys as he tries to get a hit on him. The mating bond had just snapped for Azriel he shouldn’t have provoked him, but Rhys was trying to get all the pent up energy out of him. He also was fuming at Azriel, but he didn’t need to know that part yet.
Azriel landed a particularly hard blow on Rhys’ nose. Blood sprayed, Cassians eyes widen and he knows if he doesn’t run interference now there wouldn’t be anything left of his friends to tear apart.
Hit after hit after hit. Scratch after scratch. Azriel was just going after Rhys and Rhys was matching him in aggression but he was being overpowered by feral edge that the mating bond gives Azriel.
Azriel was about to go for Rhys’ throat when Cassian caught his arm in mid-air. His siphons blazed crimson and he was using all of his strength to hold Azriel back.
“If you guys don’t stop fighting you’ll kill each other.” His features contorted in strain from using all his strength to keep Azriel at bay.
Before either Azriel or Rhys could even fire a retort back to Cassian they both stilled. Like a wolf perking its ears up when it hears a rabbit in the bushes.
“I need to get to her. She’s crying. Something’s wrong.” Azriel said with slight alarm.
Rhys must have felt it too because he had the same initial reaction. Winded from the fight, he says “It’s probably just the emotions from being reunited with her family. Feyre is crying too.”
Azriel was flooded with emotions from the bond and he didn’t know how to discern them from his own. His emotions are heightened and in turn so are his reactions.
“I will find whoever made her cry and make them pay.” He says with a grave finality, the spymaster going on a mission.
Cassian facepalms himself. “Oh brother let’s not be so dramatic now.”
Rhys scoffs, “No let’s not-“
Azriel takes off in a gust of wind that nearly knocks him down.
“-do that”
Rhys sighs and looks at Cassian with a look that says “can you believe this?” Cassian shrugs his shoulders,laughs, and goes “You were just as bad when the mating bond first snapped.”
“No I was not-”
Cassian is in the air, following after Azriel before Rhys could even finish.
Rhys then takes off after them mumbling to himself. “How dare they leave their high lord. Beron would have had them fed to his fire hamsters for that or whatever Autumn Court beasts he has. Eris is close enough-”
-
You look up expecting to see all three of them in their most regal finery as esteemed members of this Court, but are instead met with the bloodied Illyrian warriors that looked like they had come back from war.
What in the world? For Cauldron's sake, why couldn't they go through one major court event without something calamitous happening? The only one relatively unscathed was Cassian, the other two were much worse for wear. Blood and dirt caked Azriel's brow and Rhysand sported a black eye. Their previous finery had been torn away and shredded. Their arms were bear and littered with smaller cuts and slashes that were quickly healing.
You had come up this whole plan on how to avoid Azriel by busying yourself with everyone else and just never nearing him or meeting his gaze. You didn't even have a chance to avoid Azriel's gaze because he immediately rushed up to you, cupping your face in his scarred hands and surveying you and then everyone else for any risk of damage. "Are you alright? I heard you crying. Is everything okay?" He looks at you frantic, his hazel eyes drowning in worry that he has no right to feel.
You were about to pull away, fighting the urge to melt into his touch and to be repulsed by his audacity, when Rhys yanked him back by the back of the collar like a dog that needs to be leashed. "Know your place shadowsinger she doesn't talk to anyone else before she talks to her dashing brother." He gives you a smug smile as he spins you around in an all encompassing hug.
Even if you both didn't act like it at times you dearly loved your brother. Even before he was your only family left, you guys had always been close and keeping your distance these past few months was so immensely difficult because at the end of the day Rhys is your family.
After a minute or two Cassian jumped in on your guys' hug. "MY TURN!" The Illyrian warrior had substantially overestimated his size and brought you two down with him. You missed these idiots.
Azriel stood there almost nervously, shadows swirling around like storm clouds circling him. You know it would be weird if you give him the cold shoulder when you had greeted everyone, including Elain, so warmly.
You get up off the floor, leaving Rhys and Cassian to argue who's fault it was that you guys ended up there. You slowly approach the shadowsinger, he lets you come to him as if you were a stray cat and he was a small child on the side of the road trying to take you home.
"Hello." You say, polite, but not giving him much to work with. You had a million things you wanted to say at him and a million more you wanted to yell at him. He's a spymaster he has obviously noticed the shift in your dynamic and the changes in you. Let's just leave it at this and move forward civilly. This should be easy, Azriel has never been one to initiate physical contact anyways, he'll just leave you be and go continue hiding and brooding which is fine as you wont have to deal with him.
His shadows pick up their speed and begin rapidly swirling. His eyes fill with an emotion you can’t quite place and like he did before he rushes up to you. Unlike Rhys and Cassians’ hugs that felt like a burst of excitement this one felt like relief. The moment of peace after the storm in which you see why it was all worth it.
Azriel held on to you like his life depended on it. His arms were a lifeline when you didn’t even know you were drowning. One arm wrapped snugly around your waist and the other over your shoulders while he held your head into his chest his thumb stroking your hair.
For a few seconds you let the world fall away and all you knew is how much you cared for one another. At the very core of you and Azriel’s connection is that deep rooted care for each another and that would take a lot more than a conflict to change. You have never been this upset with him in your life but you know that if anything was to ever happen to him a part of you would be forever lost.
The way he was holding you was so unlike Azriel. He was holding you tighter and in a way that was much more…intimate? Physical contact was never Azriel’s specialty so why is he doing this now?
You snapped out of it and immediately jumped away schooling your features into a mask of neutrality. He is still holding on to you as you make your sad attempt of pulling away. In a voice as low as a whisper, attempting to hide your words from the prying ears of the fae you tell him,“ I hear congratulations are in order. Three brothers for three sisters it's good to hear your sticking it to the Mother's lack of continuity."
You're hurt, but joking about it is the best way you could put him in a neutral zone the quickest and draw the lines as they stand. You don't believe in love triangles they're your least favorite trope because there is always the odd one out getting hurt and right now it's you.
Even though you already knew from what Elain had said earlier that it didn't work out between them and Lucien had also talked about Elain being on the fence about deciding to give him a chance, you wanted to take a jab at Azriel. Was it petty and a low blow? Yes, but what could people expect from you? You are Rhys' sister.
He looks shocked at first then straightens up. "That was the past. I have learned the consequences of forsaking the Mother. Right now, my focus lies elsewhere." His gaze burns in your soul and his tone carries the reverence of a speech. He sounded as if he were swearing an oath.
You scoff, "We'll you have been forsaking a lot recently." His eyes darken and he stares you down, "How would you know what I've been doing lately? You left without even as much as a notice or explanation and you've written to everyone except for me."
You hear the pain and frustration in his voice and you can't bring yourself to care. You provoked him, but you were so angry and so tired and you wanted him to hurt the way you did that you just keep going.
Your brows furrow and your eyes cut into him. "Well, you wouldn't have even noticed my absence if it wasn't for your shadows. Is my presence so insignificant to you that you can't notice that something is wrong until your spies tell you. For such a revered spymaster I am struggling to comprehend how your skills only fall short when I'm involved."
Your tone is ice and your words are fire. You just wanted to keep going and going and going throwing stone after stone.
He looks frantic, Azriel has never been good at verbalizing his feelings and you knew that. His head was in a tailspin and he didn’t know how to respond.
He begins to speak so slowly, as if he was physically struggling to get the words out. “That’s because you’re different from everyone else. I actually care what you think.” His eyes held a silent plea, a sight you would have done anything in your power to prevent months ago, but right now you’re too far gone to deal with his half assed attempts at caring for you.
“Oh for cauldrons sake you-“ You couldn’t finish your sentence because your feet are off suddenly lifted from the ground. Your thrown over a shoulder and marched off.
“Did anyone ever tell you it’s a party foul to start an intense emotionally charged argument at a ball in your honor?” Rhys is every bit of smug and annoying as he was as a child. As you’re trying to get out of his grasp he starts to spin you. You throw yourself forward and throw him to the ground with you not wanting to hear a Rhys lecture.
Cassian was running interference on Azriel seemingly inspired by Rhys’ tactics. He was trying to pick up Azriel and Azriel was not having it. “Get away from me.” Cassian was not getting away from Azriel. He smacks Cassian’s hand away. Cassian smacks his hand back and they start a slap fight.
Eris and Lucien walk in holding two drinks each and look to see the high lord and princess on the floor while the general and spymaster are in a toddler level slap fight. This was the feared Nigjt Court that they were supposed to be visiting?
Eris downs one glass. Then another and makes both disappear. He then grabs the second glass out of Lucien’s hand and clinks their glasses together before taking a sip of the third one.
Lucien downs his glass and then takes Eris’ glass and promptly downs that too. This was going to be a rough couple of months.
“Petulant children all of you.” Eris said with disdain as he smacks his arm around Lucien’s shoulder and turns them around right back to the party and away from all this Night Court commotion.
-
Note: This is a bit of a shorter chapter but hey we got their official reunion. Az cannot read the room but hey it makes for great entertainment! Things will begin picking up especially w all the current turmoil. Again thank you for all the support I hope you guys like where the story is going so far and until next time my lovelies
Note note: if I say I edited this I would be lying…
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