Love's flower.

Hey you all know about that fungus that possesses ants to make them climb on the tip of grass blades in hopes of getting eaten by a cow, so that the fungus can continue its life cycle in the cow's guts? Because I think that's the kind of thing that's wrong with cave divers.

We don't know what's down there. We don't know what's gotten into their heads that makes them so determined to physically, personally go down there to find out. But I wouldn't entirely dismiss the possibility that whatever has gotten into them is very invested in getting eaten by whatever is down there.

Hey OP? What the FUCK does this mean?

decay exists as an extant form of life

That’s a terrifying answer, have a nice day

THE ORIGINAL?!?!!!!!!!!;!!!!!!!!???

@hellsite-hall-of-fame

the "came back wrong" trope except like... they didnt. like this mad scientists wife died, and so he studied necromancy, brought her back, and she came back and it all worked. like she came back exactly the same as she was before with literally no difference. but the scientist guy is like "oh no... what have i done.... shes Different now!!!! she came back Wrong!!!!" and shes just like. chilling. reading a book. cooking dinner. shes just so so normal but in the guys mind hes like "oh shes soooo weird" but shes just normal

Peer reviewed tags from @somanyofthekids

NO its a JOKE and YOU DONT GET IT. ITS NOT THAT DEEP

While she was dead he put his memory of her on such a high pedestal that she could never live up to it alive

alternatively‚ she came back perfectly fine but he thinks she came back wrong‚ because the tragic reality is that he never actually knew his wife

im going INSANE thats MY POST.

It's your post but the journey to posting it changed it to such a degree that even its closest intimacies are now foreign to you. Sorry dude.

"if tumblr dies you can find me on bluesky" "if tumblr dies you can find me on Instagram" if tumblr dies you cannot find me. It's over. I'm free.

slowly approaching bear

the bears will be in eventually

Bear will arrive sooner than thought.

BEAR IS APPROACHING AT ALARMING SPEEDS

BEAR IS GO FAST LOSING TRACK OF BEAR

BEAR HAS REACHED MACH ONE

WE HAVE LOST VISUAL ON BEAR

He nyooms

since mrs, ms, and mr are all descended from the latin word magister, i propose the gender neutral version should be mg, short for "mage"

some people think this is a shitpost so i want to clarify that i am dead fucking serious. make mage the official gender neutral honorific NOW. i want it on my passport. i want it on my bank account. i want doctors and judges to use it for me. i don't care if it sounds a little silly. people thought "missus" sounded crass at first. call me mg.

benefits of mg:

drawbacks:

when you are most definitely not evil

The last one is genuinely insightful on how denialist claims tend to resemble each other. "Oh, Armenians weren't targeted because they were Armenians, they were targeted because they wanted independence from the Ottoman Empire (because they had been historically oppressed by Turkish people). You can't say they were targeted for being Armenian". Now what does that remind you?

can’t wait to get home n dive pussy first on to my bed

there are only two genders btw. people who are alive and people who are fucking dead

recently we were out on a hilltop taking photos of the comet and suddenly some car's headlights blind us from across the bay. literally four miles away.

who the fuck is out here with these nuclear fusion powered headlights. who puts naval searchlights on their fucking toyota tacoma.

Sodus Point, east of Rochester, NY

mystery solved

my family fucked up my life by using spoonerisms interchangeably with their true phrase counterparts since before i was born and now i can’t escape from instinctively saying shit like “im gonna shake a tower”

oh “meeking a smee” made me feel like i was being fucking tazed

theres a lot of people on this website who dont realize their dad is a gnome