Pinned Post, I Guess

Pippin/Gladdie/Ten, 31

it/its, one/ones, voi/void, trying hu/hume

system host

eldrigender, cryptogender, agender for short

full time student (biochem/psych), part time professional caregiver

system pronouns and terms page

Engineer arts in progress, included the small chunk I have boarded but not finished, overlays are absent for now because I am working on other stuff. I need ideas for the blank sections if anyone happens to have any, I'm GOING to get this to a state where at least what is happening in each scene is fairly clear or so help me, might take a while, though

I want O5ver to get in a bar brawl with Heretic, but I can't imagine why they would do this, I just think it needs to happen

I think like the real problem is no one has sat down with Tutelary to explain that Heretic might be bad for it even if he does care about and love it, all anyone did was say "he doesn't love you" over and over and over and refuse to accept anything it considered affection as evidence to the contrary. No one ever pointed at specific things and said "it's not cool he did that," and the message it took was "the things that I sometimes don't like would only be bad if he didn't love me." It's unfortunate, but that's how they think. Some people at the Foundation were trying the correct approaches, but got undermined by others doing the wrong approach. Might reassign those actions to Liar/Lielings for the sake of getting it able to trust anons again, among personal reasons.

Elaborating on the tags on the can't go back thing:

It's awful because Tutelary thinks "he loved who I was when we met so I have to go back to that," yes, but the reason it thinks it can is because it spent years doing things it knew would break most people, things that killed Emery as a psychological entity, so it must be different, right? And it has a functionally exalted status, not one it consciously acknowledges, but it's not immune to the subconscious impact that the followers have on it and on Heretic. On some level it knows he's revered and he picked it, and so it has to be special, too, but it has to prove that in its own mind.

And then Heretic is no help because he doesn't see this. He isn't registering that, he thinks it wants to go back to when it seemed healthier for its own sake, that it'd be happier there, and of course he wants it to be happy, so he supports those efforts.

The therapist is missing information to realize this is what's going on and get a solution that, while not ideal as an end goal, would at least engender growth, and Tutelary might be resistant to it if only because it was told doing it for the wrong reason is bad, in a way that communicated that doing a healing thing for bad reasons is worse than just not healing. It needs to unlearn that, first.

It's all deeply entrenched from its time as an Overseer and self-reinforcing and there aren't simple solutions.