long live bad taste

odysseus absolutely does present a threat to penelope if he perceives her as at all unfaithful, and i feel the unfairness of this, and i think people tend to undersell how much tension at least potentially exists between odysseus and penelope. but i'm also like. his reaction, all speculation aside, his actual reaction in the odyssey to her flirting with the suitors is delight, because he immediately ascertains that she is running a con. sorry that they're so in-sync in spite of the forces that try to drive a wedge between them, including their own misgiving hearts. sorry that they invented homophrosyne ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

oh, you meant they literally did, ok

would i, tumblr user thee odysseyofhomer, lie to you?

...

this is the only funny addition to this post

need a full body massage a margarita 400mg of ibuprofen a plate of brownies at least an hour in a jacuzzi and 20,000 dollars cash

never thought Disney would be bold enough to address the strain on Nick and Judy's relationship after the abortion

tumblr and discord changing their ui just enough to be noticeable within a week of each other, 1 million billion neurodivergent people found dead

i go on discord. the icons are tiny now. i go on tumblr. the icons are massive. i kill myself

Okay okay okay so I’m changing like every recognizable detail of this for privacy purposes but yall need to appreciate this

So I know how to retain CCTV footage, right? It doesn’t come up everywhere but I know my way around- and if someone gets jumped in a parking lot or whatever I can go backwards and see whodunnit

So I’m at this one place, right? And I get a call that an older woman in a wheelchair got hurt somehow and we need to see what happened.

Nobody remembers the exact time, because of course not, but they tell me she was wearing like a massive hot pink jacket and she’s in a wheelchair and she left with a medic round 09:45ish, so I figure I’ll start there.

So I find the incident itself no problem, but they need ALL footage for liability and insurance and stuff, so I have to keep going

And about ten minutes backwards, I lose her. She comes into view past a single shelf on one of the worse cameras and vanishes.

like. VANISHES. Hot pink jacket, big bulky black chair, gonzo. No idea where she came from.

So, I pull up entry cams. Zoom backwards till I see her come in… at like 06:15.

THREE AND A HALF HOURS EARLIER.

So first off, this is gonna take me like two hours minimum to write down, forget retention. And I’m kind of dying in my soul a bit but I start over there, watching her come in and meander and whatever.

At about 08:30ish she disappears.

Doesn’t leave. Doesn’t head to a bathroom. Doesn’t take her coat off. Her trail just stops.

Now, I’ve done this before. Typically, a location only has the mandatory minimum amount of room for a chair or walker to get around, so a person using one can only go forwards and it’s hard to 180. That limits options and makes it easier to follow, whereas a little unattended and fully mobile kid will zoom around in circles and shit and go who the hell knows where.

Then I see her again on the other ass end of the building, and I have to go back again to see how she GOT there.

My guys.

Her two and three-point turns are INCREDIBLE.

She’s popping on the wheels, flip, zoom, she’s out somewhere I didn’t think she could even GET to. I’ve been planning my search for places that fit a wheelchair or least-resistance fast-paths from A to B and she’s like… doing some Tokyo Drift shit.

I don’t know WHY. The whole place is basically completely accessible so long as you put up with having to reverse, but no. No, she goes where she wants.

I’ve been at this for half the day, and I still have no idea where she went for like an hour and a half.

Fuck me, I’m taking a lunch break

This is barely an exaggeration

I don't know anything about YuGiOh but "Overworked" is the greatest card art they've ever done

Yeah that’s good but check out the original OCG art:

Me checking my inbox on tumblr dot com

one day im just gonna do it. im gonna vanish into the scottish highlands like god intended

"You're losing blood" no I know exactly where it is. The floor. Don't ever underestimate me.

idk where all of this weed-smoke discourse erupted from, but “weed is fine and you shouldn’t be a snitch about it” and “don’t burn plant matter in public spaces where someone you don’t know might have, like, a lung condition” are two sentiments that can and do coexist. i have asthma and i hang out with stoners pretty much constantly. i’ve never felt the urge to snitch and no one has ever blatantly disrespected my avoidance of smoke. they’re always eager to help keep it away from me when needed, which isn’t difficult to do. i hate to say this, but my only takeaway from a hypothetical scenario in which a stoner is blasting weed smoke in public like a dragon and an asthmatic feels the need to involve the cops is that both individuals are unpleasant and i don’t want to be around either of them lmao

Its come to my attention that a lot of people do not know how to deal with a hot car in summer. A lot of people will get back to their car, after hours of it being parked in the full sun, and will open the door to be blasted in the face with furnace-level temperatures, and you'll just clamber in and shut the doors and leave the windows closed and you'll start driving that thing, and you'll wait for the air-conditioning to battle and overcome the heat.

Thats. Insane to me.

The inside of a car can get up to 40°C/104°F hotter than the outside temperature. Why would anyone get inside that????? It's gonna take your air-conditioning at least half an hour to combat that and bring the temperature down to something even remotely reasonable, and in the meantime you're sitting there risking heatstroke.

Now, I understand that it's currently winter in the northern hemisphere, which is where most of this site lives, but a) I'm in the southern hemisphere and today was Lots Of Degrees, and b) y'all should read this now and commit it to memory or queue it to reblog in summer or whatever, because it boggles my mind that some of you get into a car whose interior is literally oven-hot.

So!!!! Some tips!!!!!

If you do this, your car will be a hell of a lot more comfortable a hell of a lot sooner than it would be if you got into a 60°C/140°F cabin and just.... endured that, until your aircon could overcome it.

This post has been brought to you by an Australian who knows not one but TWO people who get into 60°C cars and wait 15 to 30 minutes for their car to drop back down to a temperature that's even REMOTELY tolerable.

Until like a month ago I lived in Phoenix, Arizona where it hit 99° before the end of March this year. Almost nobody cracked their windows. I've never understood why.

i love the phrase "which could mean nothing" i think its my favorite thing to come out of the internet ever i love saying it. it could mean nothing but we all know better. we know the truth.

excuse me, no I wasn't???

congratulations to today’s lucky 10000

Go Girls Go! | First Dyke March in Washington DC, 1993

I attended Pride in 1995 in Atlanta and "Dykes on Bikes" was marching directly behind "Dykes With Tykes". This immediately created a huge stir among my group of onlookers! Because we all wanted them to join forces as "Dykes On Bikes With Tykes On Trikes".

These two groups were followed by Digital Queers--"We're here, we're queer, we have EMAIL!"

I doubt there was a single person at that march who hadn't been called a homophobic slur--and that includes our straight allies! But we defanged those words. We changed what they meant to us, because even gay or lesbian is a slur when someone screams it in your face.

This. This is solidarity in shared reclamation. "they can't say it"

They're SAYING IT TOGETHER as part of a UNIFIED FRONT. Rather than letting others tear them into disparate little bickering subgroups.

“sorry i can’t come out, i have plans”

the plans:

The carnivorous faggots over my rotting corpse:

one day, you, tumblr user 1000deer, will deactivate, and the reblogs of this post on tumblr dot com will continue, those rebloggers will be the carnivorous faggots, and you will finally be the rotting corpse

I will outlive your ass bitch the only carnivorous faggot here is me

this is problematic of me (joke) but i really enjoy the splashing of french into english speech or writing. just adds a pizzazz

*adds a certain je ne sais quoi

see the problem is that despite around 8 years of french schooling the french language has utterly escaped my brain so even the most obvious set up i had created for myself by accident was missed by me. such is life.

*c'est la vie

god damn it

) <- super parenthesis. reblog to close all parentheticals you opened and forgot to close in your life and return to equilibrium

Due to budget cuts, we are eliminating the benefit of the doubt. If it looks like a fascist dog whistle, then it just fucking is. We regret the delusions of normalcy that this may have removed for you, but believe this will lead to a stronger country.