knight in shining cargo shorts

‪im going to fix the economy‬

Generally I think straight men should not say faggot but this trea turner (baseball player) tweet is so fucking funny that it’s allowed I think

yippieeee~ ahahaha~ yaaaaaaaaay~!⋆｡°✩

me when im normal

#cottagecore

this and a blunt

it’s so deeply sad that helly probably longs to be a bush girl but helena absolutely keeps that thing bald as hell

alright. i have to make an amendment. helena longs to be a bush girl as well. there. i’ve said it. she’s pressured herself into the waxings the same way she was pressured to undergo severance.

she’s locked herself into a life of complete restraint. you’ve seen her with that boiled egg. swimming those laps like a robot. it makes me sick. my darling longs for a huge sandwich. full bush in a bikini. floating freely in the ocean.

you have to admit it: most if not all animals are very brave. they do a lot of things and dont always know whats going to happen. they have beautiful eternal souls because of this

its crazy how elections happen more often the older you get. the obama administration lasted from about 1179 bce to 633 ce

the thing about being nonbinary is that you really do start to forget that other people have such strict walls around what is and isn’t allowed for genders. i thought we all agreed that we made that up. could you climb out of the cave real quick and feel the sunshine for a minute.

I love that dylan didn’t even really know what the fuck was going on he just saw helly blocking the door surrounded by the marching band and was ready immediately to lock in with the vending machine like that’s a true comrade

He is the most ride or die BFF to ever live. Any of the MDR guys could tell him they’d just murdered someone in cold blood and his immediate response would be asking if they needed help hiding the body and/or killing anyone else.

Ok well mommy is gonna hog tie you to a missile and then launch it into the sky and youll die in a big fiery explosion ok puppy?