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@sainttheosylas / sainttheosylas.tumblr.com

♎️/18+/Not kid friendly
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I need to hype this up and I already made a graphic for @wolfehorror’s FANTASTIC #sludgepit event on bluesky so here goes:

NEEDLEHEART is the working title of my upcoming dark medieval fantasy novel about a depressed, ostracized nun on a suicide mission that would usher in the end times. While her quest, her beliefs and the real world clash and she starts to doubt everything she’s ever been told.

Heavily inspired by Between Two Fires, INDIKA and the countless cult survivor memoirs I’ve read.

#needleheart#the saint speaks#indie writer#dark fantasy#writing#indie publishing#medieval horror#between two fires#indika
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Reblogged bananahomo
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I’ve been listening to the people in the apartment below me have arguments for two years now and I still can’t figure out what language they’re speaking. The best I can narrow it down is like if Portuguese and Hebrew had a baby. Is that a common pidgin combination

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I just listened to a clip of this and jesus christ you fucking got it. there are like 3500 people in the whole united states who speak this and two of them are in a very fraught marriage four feet below me

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Reblogged saathiray
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my little brother tried to show me a "cool trick" where he entered my name and hometown into chatgpt and tried to get it to pull up my personal info like it did on all of his friends, then was absolutely shocked when it couldn't find anything on me

so. keep practicing basic internet safety, guys. it still works. don't put your personal info on social media, keep all your accounts on private, turn off ai scraping on every site that you can, enable all privacy features on social media apps. our info still can be protected, we have to keep fighting for control

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Reblogged
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Moonflow is coming!

Moonflow, my trans splatterpunk psychedelic hippiesploitation horror novel about a trans shroom dealer getting lost in a haunted forest and running afoul of a cult of lesbian separatist hippies and the fungus god that they worship, is available for preorder! Make the right decision and preorder Moonflow!

Check it, the experts all agree!

  • "Weird, wild, and oh-so-wretched, Moonflow is the trans botanical horror we need in the world right now. Moonflow will sink its tendrils into you and infest you with its spores...and you'll enjoy it." Drew Huff, author of The Divine Flesh and Free Burn
  • “I’ve never read a book like Moonflow before! It has the energy of a John Waters movie: crass, profane, populated with memorably bizarre and grotesque characters, packed with social commentary and bittersweet pathos—the type of art that is necessary for the current moment.” Briar Ripley Page, author of Corrupted Vessels
  • "Is it legal to have this much fun reading a book? I'm in awe of Bitter Karella's incredible gift for creating biting satire without a shred of cruelty. Moonflow made me laugh out loud while genuinely caring about its wild cast of characters, from its all too relatable failed protagonist, to its mondo trash cinema meets Women Who Run With The Wolves villain. This is the queer splatterpunk salvation/dissolution comedic relief narrative we need in these dark times. I had a f*cking blast." Joe Koch, author of The Wingspan of Severed Hands and Invaginies
  • "Wow—what a trip. Literally! The kind of book that you have to strap into, because it’s going to buck you off if you’re not prepared. There's genuinely no predicting what the hell awaits you around the next bend. This book is a prime example of why horror will literally always be timely and necessary; it finds beauty in the grotesque with some of the most stomach-turning description and heartfelt self-exploration I've ever read. I can honestly say that this is the first time that I’ve been genuinely scared by a book. Moonflow is simultaneously a Tarantino car chase sequence and an Ari Aster monster reveal; it’s fun, and it’s disgusting, and it’s just a damn good time. But at the heart of it all, it’s a bleeding, beating heart and an earnest heroine just trying to make it work."  Megan Bontrager, author of The Sea Hides Its Dead

Don't delay! Preorder Moonflow today!

#moonflow#trans horror#lgbtq horror#bitter karella
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Reblogged the-hwaelweg
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Sir Terry Pratchett awakens. A skeleton stands at his bedside, wearing a long black robe. He sits up. “Well, hang on, let me get my hat,” he tells it.

The skeleton reaches into its robe. From abyssal depths it produces a heavy book bound in sheets of lead and night. It is the kind of book that gets stolen by a rugged adventurer from a temple with more spike-traps than the average house of worship contains. It is the kind of book to which the word “tome” might properly be applied. Frost forms on its pages from the lingering chill of the void. 

The skeleton coughs once and holds the book out to the man sitting on the bed.

WOULD YOU SIGN THIS? it asks. BIG FAN.

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Oh this must be reblogged, 10 years later

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Reblogged saathiray
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context: the heritage foundation is trying to launder data in support of doge by sending a survey to only their supporters and using blatantly leading questions. the survey takes less than 5 minutes and they don't verify your email

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you CAN do it multiple times if you so wish

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Oh good we broke the first one. New link is here, same story.

secured.heritage.org
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Cannot even make this shit up

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Just did this, took 2 min!!

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my infamously data skewing followers rise up!

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My followers urge to scew poll results knows no bounds

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