Pinned
jean big dick vicquemare is my favorite fanon because I know for a FACT no one’s doing it for “teehee he’s just so masculine and dominant” reasons oh no everyone who thinks he has a huge cock also thinks he’s a bottom with ssri induced erectile dysfunction. And it’s awesome. very in character. Like the one thing he could be proud of in his miserable life but instead he’s crying in the shower because he lost his monthly half chub while trying to jerk off to the thought of his superior ass fucking him.
tagging @ssshiversss for this one
Bonus (suicide tw)
I know the bringing of the law (law-jaw) was meant by the creators as a fun movie reference more than anything else but it's one of the more widely acknowledged parts of canon and as someone with a partially paralyzed jaw I'm curious how that could play into his choice of facial hair.
Like Harry, my paralysis is from a young age (around 7 for me though, not from infancy), so both sides of my face look pretty distinct from each other (obv everyone has variations on either side due to dominant chewing and swallowing but they're usually relatively similar). Due to the heavy overcompensating by the muscles on one side, you end up with one very full looking cheekbone and one very high looking cheekbone in an almost comically distinct way, one that I imagine would be extremely emphasized on Harry's bloated face.
If you get a style of facial hair that only really reveals the orbital area (zygomatic bone and upper maxilla) and can be shaped to form an artificial buccal endpoint (the hollow of the cheek) you can end up with a mostly normal looking face, and one that would be in stark contrast to a clean-shaven one (or even just with less).
This also helps (to me at least) to explain why Kim reacts so strongly to your shaving. Even shaving a bit of hair does make you look very different, that's true, but he seems surprised by the "damage" in an unexpected way. The only thing that the hair would hide is further facial puffiness and rosacea, some even paler skin, and maybe some visible veins and wrinkles, none of which should be anything particularly surprising for someone who knows about your history with addiction. A stark asymmetry in the face, however, would be very unexpected imo. Many interesting implications... to me and me alone.
Since this apparently has interesting implications to other people as well, I'll add one more thing to this that I do genuinely think is just me projecting but humor me: The Expression.
With partial paralysis, you kind of have to learn how to use what you've got to smile in a way that doesn't look too wrong/weird or cause spasms. For me, it's a big crooked smile because the right side of my face twitches when I try to smile and making the smile wide on the left side fills out the cheek and makes the rest of my face look even enough that people don't really pay too much attention to the fact that it's a huge off-kilter strained smile (or maybe everyone is just really polite about it). Put that on your face all the time, every day for years and yeah, you'd end up with an expression of pain for sure. Contextually in the game we know that it's a disco-era holdover, a copy of Guillaume le Million, but I'm going with the plausible deniability that it does not necessarily exclude him copying that face in the mirror and having an "oh" moment.
Inspired by @ssshiversss