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@supernaturallyafreak

@supernaturallyafreak

A freak for Supernatural? Should I say more?
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they are alive, in love, living their best lives and celebrating their wedding anniversary in their own little home <3

โ€œThereโ€™ll be peace when you are doneโ€ my fucking ass. Thereโ€™s no peace and Iโ€™m not even sure itโ€™s done.

can't wait for Jensen and Misha to do more soulful eyefucking and for Jareds character to say something about having deja vu and third wheel ptsd

Canโ€™t believe those mfs promised โ€œthereโ€™ll be peace when you are doneโ€ for fifteen goddamn years just to send Castiel to superhell and kill Dean Winchester

Dean: Cas, we've talked about this- personal space.

Also Dean: Cas.... Can I sit on your lap?? Let me just... stare at your lips and stare at your gorgeous beady blue eyes. I'll just stare from afar, or graze my hand against yours occasionally or make jokes about how you have sensible shoes (When I have them too don't worry). Don't mind me, I will caress your cheeks and neck softly when I think I've lost you... I'll gently take care of your limp body when you've died, prepare it and burn it while looking absolutely miserable. I'll fall to my knees, sobbing my eyes out for you. I'll tell you I need you. Because I really do. Can I give you a blanket when you're sick or cook you food that you won't eat? Just because I need you alright? Can I just, be so deeply in love with you and just not have to tell you?? So in love with you that a biblical curse couldn't even stop me from ultimately hurting you.

Dean: I need you Cas. I need you.

Once again thinking abt how much Dean does not want or need Cas to beat up his father. And how much Cas understands that and respects Deanโ€™s complicated feels re: John and how dean still holds love and affection for his father while still being able to be critical of him and his choices. How Cas would never overstep those feelings to make some grand knight-in-shining-armor show of retroactively getting โ€œjusticeโ€ for Dean or โ€œprotectingโ€ Dean should Cas ever meet John.

When Cas says in the cut scene from 14x14 โ€œyour father was a complicated manโ€ he means it. Heโ€™s not grasping for the only nice thing he can think to say. I think Cas fully recognizes how fucked up the whole โ€œhitchhiker routineโ€ thing is, I think he also understands that Dean does not want or need to hear in that moment stuff like โ€œIโ€™d kill your fatherโ€ or even โ€œI hate him for what he did / made you do.โ€ Even if Cas feels that way, I think he understands that it wouldnโ€™t be the productive thing to say. Maybe some other time, maybe when theyโ€™re alone and not actively on a case posing as FEDs. Maybe when Dean is in a space where he can actually have that vulnerable conversation with Cas and unpack those feelings, where he can talk abt how yea a lot of things were fucked up abt his childhood. But for now Cas can acknowledge what he already knows abt Deanโ€™s feelings toward John, theyโ€™re complicated. Dean holds both love and hate for him. John was a complicated man. Dean doesnโ€™t need Cas to spit fire at John. He doesnโ€™t need Cas to promise to kill him. He doesnโ€™t want that, either.

If John were to come back, if Cas had met him in Lebanon, adult Dean can hold his own. 40 yr old dean is not seeking Johnโ€™s approval or afraid of him. In Lebanon dean immediately tells john about Cas and jack, heโ€™s not hiding them. And by the end he underlines and makes clear just what they mean to him, theyโ€™re his family. Specifically theyโ€™re his version of the family John expected Dean to have, a spouse and kids. So, 40 yr old Dean isnโ€™t afraid of his dad. He isnโ€™t hiding. Heโ€™s at peace and proud of who he is and what he has. Cas would stand by him with quiet support. (And maybe some squinty glares should John have anything unkind to say toward Dean about anything).

Beating up John wouldnโ€™t be a comfort to Dean. It wouldn't really heal any wounds. Itโ€™s unnecessary drama. Dean's made his peace with his father, he's moved on. Unless John was actively hurting dean and Dean couldnโ€™t handle the fight himself, Cas isnโ€™t throwing punches on Deanโ€™s behalf.

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