your friend is amazing and i'm so glad you have her! yes, we need solidarity between all kinds of trans people!! we need to stick together, fight for each other cause at the end of the day, we're all in this together.

regarding the transphobia, i'm so sorry you have to go through that. and yes, those "allies" are shit.

i think that's really cool of you and i respect that a lot. being trans is hard enough, but not meeting expectations of what a trans person should be, being gender non-conforming or just having these little things that could potentially make other people question you even more can be especially challenging. i like that you decided to stay true to yourself and not conform, even though that makes it harder for you.

surely there are other trans guys and trans mascs that didn't change their name for whatever reasons. whether that reason is of your own choice because you like that name, or because you feel like you can't go by a male name, it's okay. your name doesn't define your gender. being trans and not conforming to gender stereotypes on top of that can be really tricky. so be extra nice to yourself. you're cool.

this message is several months old, i'm sorry!

anyway, thank you so much for sharing this with me and i'm really glad this blog is helpful to you.:) much love!

tw: mention of suicidal thougts

hi anon, i'm so sorry for replying several months later. i hope this still somehow finds its way to you or at least helps others. once again, i'm sorry.

that is a horrifying and traumatic experience and i'm really sorry that happened to you. i'm glad you didn't give up living and are still here. i hope you give yourself credit for that and thank yourself. you did great.:)

being ashamed of being trans is completely understandable in regards to your experience and the state of the world right now, so make sure not to add to the shame by telling yourself you shouldn't feel ashamed and should be proud. it's natural to feel like that after being bullied and told to kill yourself. i wonder how your mental health is in general. i hope you're getting the help you need and being nice to yourself. that kind of stuff is really hard to go through.

if you want any advice on how to be more confident with being trans and overcoming the fear of other people knowing, i think the first step would be accepting those feeling of shame. name the feeling, feel it in your body and sit with it. it should get at least a little better.

the second thing i'd do is to work on self-compassion and loving yourself, giving yourself the validation and care you need. you can find many resources online. i think it would be good to promise yourself that you'll prioritize your own happiness and authenticity now matter what others say and that you'll protect yourself if someone attacks you. that you'll always be by your side.

i wonder if you personally know any other trans people? depending on where you live, meeting other trans people can be easy or very difficult, but i think a great step would be to try to find at least one trans friend (preferably in person, but online is okay too) and listen to their story. maybe their resilience and pride would make you respect them and then you could extend the same respect and admiration to yourself.

remember, there is nothing wrong with you and you have nothing to be ashamed for. we've been here for thousands of years, we've been silenced and dehumanized and killed and opressed but we're still here!! we go out and try to be our most authentic self, we fill the world with love and acceptance and openness and freedom despite all the hardships. isn't that beautiful and admirable? you're strong and brave for finding yourself and choosing to follow your heart. that's something to be proud of. a lot of people can't do that. you went agaist a stream of hate and you survived. you didn't give up. i'm proud of you. and you were born a man. a man who happens to be trans, but is a man nonetheless.

damn, your chest with top surgery scars looks really fucking good. yes, even yours.

hi, sorry to everyone who have sent an ask and haven't gotten their reply yet. i go on tumblr rarely, but i promise you will get that reply (if it's about trans stuff)

hi, sorry for the late reply, i haven't been online for a long time.

you are absolutely a real man, a real boy even if and when you menstruate. what others think or say doesn't matter. you're valid and you're a real man just as much as any cis man.

the binarity of gender and biological sex are reductive man-made concepts anyway. you don't have to subscribe to them. what constitues a "real" or "fake" man/woman are all made up concepts that served a certain purpose in the structure of a society (and some of these purposes are very unethical). they're not some truths in stone. so if you feel like a man and want to be a man, you are. go and live that truth. you're a wonderful man who happens to have a period. you're a real man.

sending love your way.

i know this is a blog for transmascs and trans men but let me take a moment to say: trans women and transfemme people, you are amazing. please keep being you and keep living. this world is better with you in it. i love you.

that is a very valid reason (not that there are any invalid reasons to wear the kind of underwear you want). i'm sorry your family is transphobic and that you have to keep living with them. i wish you the best!!! sending love!!!

yes!! thank you, anon!!

No.

First of all, you're putting words in my mouth and you're greatly exaggerating. I never said anything about "big female boobs", i never said "girly vagina", i never said you should accept your "natural" body. I never posted about nondysphoric trans people, as far as I can remember.

I'm a gay nonbinary trans man and I'm not traditionally masculine. I write a lot of posts about embracing traditionally feminine things because I'm that way and I know how difficult that is while being trans. I want people to know that it's okay to not follow gender roles when you're trans. Being super masculine is just not the reality for many transmascs. For example, I'd love to have a dick. But phalloplasty with results that i'd be satisfied with is not only not available to me, I'm concerned about getting my reproductive organs removed in case there is a shortage of T and I end up not having access to sex hormones, which can be dangerous for your health. The world is nuanced.

If you want to be completely masculine, that's fine. Masculinity is okay. Masculinity is beautiful. So write your own post or politely request a post from me. But don't expect that from other transmascs. Don't make your dysphoria our problem. This is what we're trying to change – the notion that vulvas and boobs are inherently female and feminine, because they aren't. We're doing this partly to ease our dysphoria.

Transphobes hate trans people no matter if we "look our gender" or not. There will always be someone hating if we're open about being trans. So stop taking it out on your people and start loving other trans people. We're stronger together with all of our differences.

i saw a post where someone mentioned "a trans guy still wearing panties instead of boxers" and it made me feel like wearing "women's" underwear as a trans man is something kind of embarrassing that only "baby trans guys" do. so here's to all the trans men and trans masculine people who wear underwear from the women's section: it really doesn't matter. it's not embarrassing, it's not unmanly, it's not shameful and it doesn't mean that you're doing transmasculinity wrong. i've never worn underwear from the men's section but i assume the textile would be loose in the front to accommodate something i don't have, right? i feel like that could be potentially uncomfortable for me. feel free to add your thoughts and experiences, i'm interested in hearing them. but at the end of the day, it really doesn't matter what you wear. you should feel comfortable and good about yourself, and that's all that matters. don't let anyone make you feel ashamed for this.