i had a dream i worked in an underwater restaurant and people kept ordering ice in their drinks and then getting mad at me when it would float away. and i’d tell them beforehand that the ice would float away & they’d be like lol no that’s not how it works just give me the ice. I’m fighting customer service battles never seen before

people have been saying squidward on this all day but this is the first one that made me laugh

i found this bald kaiser plush while scrolling though pinterest and i just had to draw it

i'm not going to lie. i would do this all the time

vague prophet

something will happen

a lot of bad bitches are following me... thank u for ur service

my thoughts about noritoshi and his hair

People online: Mixed height relationships are predatory and pedophilic

People in real life: Did you know the LA fires were set intentionally to destroy entrances to the secret tunnels to Diddy’s sex dungeons and Beyoncé knows

not to brag but im wanted by some very important organizations

say what you will about the reserve bank of india these are some cracking coins