Garden

Garden

Favorite films

  • Ghost World
  • The Holy Mountain
  • All That Jazz
  • Breaking the Waves

Recent activity

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  • The White Diamond

    ★★★½

  • What Happened Was...

    ★★★★

  • Richard Jewell

    ★★★½

  • On Memory

    ★★★★

Recent reviews

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  • Dr. Caligari

    Dr. Caligari

    ★★★½

    Gays gone wild.

    I'm not sure why I bothered to watch the original Cabinet of Dr. Caligari in preparation for this, because the two really have nothing in common beside the namesake and the unhinged production design.

    There's really nothing I could say that could prepare a person for something like this. It's pure, unfettered madness; camp that's so self aware it warps its way around into an off-kilter sense of reality where perversion reigns supreme and kinks physically manifest in this psychosexual Cronenbergian nightmare.

    You are not ready.

  • Convict 13

    Convict 13

    ★★★

    Buster Keaton being in John Wick Chapter 2 suddenly makes so much sense when you see him in this one, as he takes on 20 guys, whipping around a ball and chain without a single cut in the action.

    Not the best Keaton short out there, but something a little different, for sure.

Popular reviews

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  • Marmaduke

    Marmaduke

    ½

    The early 2000s are BACK baby! Marmaduke's got it all:

    - Hideous character designs
    - Gutter tier voice acting
    - Dated pop culture references
    - Wildly racist stereotypes
    - Jarring tonal shifts
    - Plenty of poop and fart jokes, including one grossly overextended one that actually becomes a key plot point
    - A script so incoherent it doesn't even feel like they finished the first draft
    - And let's not forget a cringeworthy credits song

  • The Hunger

    The Hunger

    ★★★★★

    It's 1983, Tony Scott kicks in the doors and proceeds to burn the bar to the ground, with one of the most confident directorial debuts in history; The Hunger is a film so immaculate in its imagery and presentation, that even a seasoned master at the height of their career might have left the theater dizzy.

    Within the first few minutes, Scott would enrapture his audience, outline his vision, and finally, lay out the groundwork for the sort of psychic…

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