What a stupid, slapdash, utterly craven motion picture this is. JJ "Mystery Box" Abrams is a coward and the corporate ownership of copyrights and trademarks is a curse.
But my eleven-year-old daughter did like it when Rey and Ben Solo smooched.
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School of Rock 2003
Each and every one of those kids is worth at least two felony kidnapping charges apiece, so it's a good thing this guy's such a charming motherfucker.
Christ, imagine the true crime podcast they'd make about this incident.
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The Batman 2022
Twenty pounds of Batman in a 10-pound sack. Best Catwoman ever, and not by a narrow margin. Best cinematic depiction of Batman as a detective. John fucking Turturro. Batman appears to diagetically be listening to remixed Nirvana and tells Alfred that Alfred isn't his real dad. Also he lives in the extremely gothic attic of a tower that's shaped like Batman.
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Grandma Werewolf 2017
I don't want to be mean to the cast and crew who presumably worked hard to make this movie with clearly very limited resources. The magic werewolf-killing sword is clearly a replica of Anduril from the Lord of the Rings movies, but that's fine, they clearly don't have the resources to make a good-looking custom blade. The werewolf is represented with a rubber mask, and that's okay, I wasn't expecting high-quality prosthetics here. This is a Kickstarter project made on…
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