Recent reviews

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  Vampire in Brooklyn 1995

  ★★ Watched 25 Apr 2019

  The Good – I think there is a solid story deep within this film. The story of a desperate vampire facing mortality for the first time in hundreds of years, and the danger that poses to not only civilians, but also “creatures” like a half-vampire who wouldn’t really know who she was unless this situation arose. Julius and Silas showed what the silliest version of the film could be, and honestly the biggest crime is that they didn’t choose a…

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  Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot 1992

  ★ Watched 02 May 2019

  The Good – The movie is yet another film that you can kind of call quaint. The further you get from the cash-grab cynicism it was obviously made with, the more it just kind of seems like a weird cop-based sitcom from the 60s. This hard-boiled LAPD detective has a new roommate … his mother! And boy are they an odd couple! I liked Getty, who played the mother. Stallone was mildly amusing. I can at least see why people…

Popular reviews

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  Hellboy 2019

  ★★½ Watched 18 Apr 2019

  The Good – I actually like Milla Jovovich’s performance. The creature designs were really really good with a lot of thought put into even minor featured characters like the giants, the monsters that take over London in the end, Baba Yaga, and the vampire in the beginning. A lot of cool visuals from that perspective. Before completely trashing the movie in the next section I should say I liked this film more than something like The Predator, where my hatred…

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  Escape Plan 2: Hades 2018

  ½ Watched 14 Feb 2019

  As the number of wide release bad movies has dropped in the past few years I’ve often thought that it is likely that at least some of them are going direct to VOD. And Escape Plan 2: Hades seemed like a perfect test of this theory. Wrong! The first film was surprisingly good, a decent team-up in Stallone and Arnold, a classic 80s actioner really. This? This is trash. This is dog poo thrown forcefully into my face. It has…

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