The Side Sex Position Is So Intimate and Intense at the Same Time
Everything you love about doggy and spooning...combined?! (Believe it.)
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The side sex position is like spooning with a glow-up. You still get all the amazing cuddling and closeness of traditional spooning, but the angle of penetration is more precise and personalized for whatever you and your partner are craving.
“This position is good for when you’re about to go to bed, have just woken up, or are a bit sleepy because it allows you both to lie down and relax,” says resident sexologist for Fleshy, Suzannah Weiss, author of Subjectified: Becoming a Sexual Subject. “It also fosters a sense of closeness because your bodies are literally close together, making it easy to kiss and touch.”
What sets side sex apart from regular old spooning is the targeted penetration. The receiver leans forward and curls their legs up to their body, angling their butt toward the giver—it looks like doggy, but flipped on its side. You get both the deep penetration of doggy and all the intimacy and romance of traditional spooning. “To make it even sweeter—or spicier, depending on your mood—the person behind can moan, dirty talk, or whisper sweet nothings into their partner's ear,” says Weiss.
Side sex is also highly tweakable. You can try it anally, and either partner can use a toy or hand on the receiver who can also move their hips to adjust the angle however they’d like. Plus, it’s extremely equitable, as far as sex positions go. “For those who prefer to be on the same level as their partner as opposed to being dominant or submissive, you’re also literally on the same plane—there is no ‘top’ or ‘bottom,’" says Weiss.
TL;DR? This might be your new favorite position. When you’re ready to try it out for yourself, here’s how to start.
Original Side Sex
First, arrange yourselves in the spooning position, then have the receiver lean forward and curl their legs up to their chest. The penetrating partner grabs onto the receiver’s hips to thrust. Weiss says this allows for easy stimulation of the upper wall of the vagina, which can feel incredible for those who love penetrative play. “The receiver can grab onto the edge of the bed with their hands for support,” she says. If you’re craving even more sensation, add a vibrating butt plug for either or both of you.
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The Lazy Lap Dance
Think of this position as a private lap dance except without you having to get out of bed, says Weiss. (Ahem, ideal.) Lie on your sides à la spooning, but both of you bend your knees, like the receiver is sitting in the giver’s lap. “If you’re the receiving partner, the penetrating partner can wrap their arms around you to steady themselves and thrust, or you can grind your butt back and forth in front of them—or a combination of both.” If you decide to go the anal route, use a high quality anal lube, and lots of it.
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The Slug
Make like a couple of mating slugs and wrap your bodies around each other. “Add a twist to this position by reaching a leg or two back and wrapping it around your partner's legs,” says Weiss. “Or if you're feeling sluggish (ha), your partner can do all the work and reach a leg forward to wrap around you.” (They can ply you with your favorite toy, as long as you’re putting them to work.) When every part of your bodies are touching and you’re fully surrounded by each other’s warmth, side sex can feel even more intimate.
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Jill Hamilton is a contributor for Cosmopolitan.com and writes the blog In Bed With Married Women.
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