sorry your entire found family died. stepped on an unexploded landmine while working through their shared trauma. actually the responsible mom friend survived but shes like just a head and part of a neck floating in a tube of green fluid. sorry
so what youre gonna wanna do is crush the garlic and ginger instead of just slicing it ok, it releases more of those good flavors. yoshi is going to eat me and turn me into an egg now, i love you. remember everything i taught you
our server's weekly movie voting rules
War has changed.
I can’t get into it without outing myself and my job, but damn I wish people could figure out how to break the rules on their own. If you involve me, if you tell me you’re going to violate a contract, I am required to do something. I’m not a cop! I’m not a narc! You could simply not tell me this shit! I am begging you to not tell me! Don’t send me an email to my work address that says “I’m going to violate our contract, how would you suggest I do it?” Well first things first don’t fucking tell me
Like one time I was working at the bar years before weed was legal. The owner hated pot and pot smokers. And this regular was standing in front of the front door smoking his little glass pipe
“Hey man, go around the corner”
“Naw it’s cool”
“It’s really not. (The owner) will ban you if he sees you doing this in front of his bar like an idiot”
“He won’t see me”
“Yeah but I see you. And I’m asking you to go around the corner so you’re not right in front of the fucking bar”
“It’s just weed. Are you scared of weed?”
“Listen you stupid hippie I use drugs that would blow your burnout mind. I don’t give a shit about weed. But do not fucking involve me, do not involve the bar. Just take seven steps to the corner and smoke your heart out”
“Naw man it’s cool”
Then the owner came outside and blew his fucking stack and the guy was barred for life. And then the owner got mad at me for not running to him and telling him hippie Dave was burning it down in front of the bar. I’m just begging you to not involve me in your poorly thought-out crimes in a way that will get us both in serious trouble. I am begging you
Bringing this back in a general way to remind people who might be considering breaking rules that maybe not telling strangers you are about to break some rules might be wise. Because you do not know where that information is going to end up
i had a dream i worked in an underwater restaurant and people kept ordering ice in their drinks and then getting mad at me when it would float away. and i’d tell them beforehand that the ice would float away & they’d be like lol no that’s not how it works just give me the ice. I’m fighting customer service battles never seen before
people have been saying squidward on this all day but this is the first one that made me laugh
Love it when you try to place it out your mind
What is the funniest pokemon move
Obsessed with the description for this move
losing my mind at the animation as well
