Avatar

will the real asenath waite please stand up

@scribeofpnakotis / scribeofpnakotis.tumblr.com

28/NB/Lesbian

I understand more and more things about cisgender men the longer I’m on testosterone. I know why teenage boys use so much axe now. I understand the crying thing. I know why they accidentally break things. I know why they wear shorts in the snow. I know why so many of them don’t use washcloths. I see everything.

Okay. Y’all want explainations? I’ll tell you all the things.

  • Testosterone makes you warm. With young men especially it can actually get really uncomfortable while their testosterone levels are at their peak. Often times coats and winter pants will keep in all their heat and it gets uncomfortable. So it makes sense to pick a part of the body to be exposed to help them stay cool. The legs tend to be the least uncomfortable part of the body to feel cold on. The arms are uncomfortable, the face hurts when it gets cold, and the torso is where all the important stuff is. It doesn’t actually hurt that much to have your lower legs exposed and there’s no important organs there so that’s what they go with to keep themselves from overheating in their winter jackets. Along this same vein, they might take their shirts off to jog or just have a naked torso in general during the summer because they’re in more danger of overheating than estrogen dominant people. Older men, children, and estrogen dominant people tend to do this stuff less because they have less testosterone and are therefore colder.
  • The axe thing is because of testosterone as well. Early on in puberty especially and into adulthood as well boys and men will stink no matter how hard they try. People often complain about how men don’t shower enough and while there is some truth to that testosterone makes you sweaty and it makes your smell last longer. It doesn’t smell worse than women’s BO, but it is harder to get rid of and easier to get. Before I started taking T I could get away with taking a shower every other day or even every three days. Now I have to take a shower every day. And some days when I shower, put on deodorant, put body spray on my clothes, avoid heavy physical activity, I still end up smelling awful. I just smell bad and there’s only so much I can do about it and that bottle of axe starts looking really tempting.
  • With crying? Testosterone just makes you cry less. You still feel all the same emotions. You just don’t cry as much. Men are often socialized to not cry, yes, but even those who haven’t been taught that still cry less. That’s just how testosterone works. They hit puberty and then it’s just harder to cry. It doesn’t necessarily mean they feel less than estrogen dominant people or that they’re repressed. They just have a different physical reaction to emotion.
  • They accidentally break things because testosterone makes it easier to gain muscle. Sometimes you even do it without meaning to. I already accidentally grabbed or slammed things too hard. Now I have to consciously be gentle. Some people forget about being gentle for a split second. Then things break. Sometimes I look at my hands now like what the hell did I just do. Relearning how to know my own strength. It’s a learning process.
  • The thing where some men don’t use washcloths and use their hands or a bar of soap instead isn’t because they’re lazy. It’s because they’re covered in hair and the washcloth pulls at it. It’s really uncomfortable actually.
Avatar
01-hug-man

WOW THAT IS AWESOME INFO

This sounds like spiderman finding his superpowers

God, I love that comparison.

Op have you felt the urge to slap the top of the doorframe yet?

Avatar
ghostkid-reimagined

OKAY I REALLY WANNA KNOW THAT TOO WHY DO THEY DO THAT???

That one is to test how tall they’re getting. Men are on average six inches taller than women and it’s fun when you get really tall and can reach stuff you never could before. Once they’re done growing it’s either to demonstrate how tall they are to other people or just because it’s fun. Jumping is fun and slapping the doorframe demonstrates both your height and how high you can jump, or if you’re so tall you don’t need to jump. Hitting stuff is fun too when nobody gets hurt from it. I did that even before I started T lol. I stopped growing before I started T but I still do it because it’s fun. It’s just one of life’s little joys. For a lot of people it also just becomes a habit. Like tapping on a desk when you’re thinking or giving your friend a high five whenever you pass them.

wow I appreciate knowing this so much

Most people: “Huh, looks like it’s about impossible to guess the difference between biological and socialized gender behaviors. Let’s just pick a few semi-plausible generalizations and shame everyone who–”

Trans people on hormone therapy, finally in a culture that sometimes lets them talk a little bit: “OH HEY SO IT’S STILL ALL SUBJECTIVE AND COMPLICATED, BUT WE HAVE SOME VERY PRECISE POINTS OF INFORMATION FOR YOU.”

Most people: “Oh shit that’s useful.”

“lol why are you following the boobs and ass artist” why do you think I’m following the boobs and ass artist. do you think I go to the grocery store ironically too

Okay. Say you ask a small child to draw you a house, and they come up with something like this:

For the purposes of this analogy the child is shit at colouring in, because I only wanted to give the general idea.

So, we can all agree that the child who draws a house probably isn't trying to communicate anything in particular other than “look at this cool house I drew”, right?

Cool.

So… Why is it seemingly in the middle of nowhere, when most children live in houses with neighbours?

Why is the main body a square and the roof a solid triangle when that doesn't look like any house that has ever been built anywhere?

Why does it have a wood-burning stove with smoke actively coming out of the chimney, even though the sun indicates warm weather?

Why is the sun smiling? Why is it yellow?

Answer: because the child has seen picture books, and films, and the drawings of other children, and has on some level absorbed that this is what a house is meant to look like.

Face to face, the child almost certainly wouldn't know where to begin communicating “yellow is a colour culturally associated with happiness and warmth, and two dots accompanied by a curved line symbolically represent a smiling human face, so I have combined these attributes with the sun to convey that it is a very warm and pleasant day”.

Or “historically most houses in my country used fire for heat and cooking, and even though this is no longer the case for the majority of households, most media portrayals of houses are inspired by other, older, media portrayals and therefore include the chimney. I have chosen to follow this trend.”

Or even, “I have poor motor control because of my age, and large, 2 dimensional shapes are easier to draw than anything involving detail and perspective”.

Yet this is all information that you can pick up from detailed study of the house drawing.

Ultimately, it's not about what the writer intended. That's what the whole death of the author thing means.

If you think of literature like as a conversation, then think of all the analysis stuff that your English teacher keeps trying to get you to look at as like body language. It's the stuff that the other person doesn't even necessarily mean to communicate, but that can tell you a hell of a lot about what they mean.

Also, a poem written by a poet who got high is still a poem written by a poet.

People love to say dismissive bullshit like, "oh, that's just the drugs talking" but actually, drugs can't fucking talk! It is always the human being doing the talking regardless of how intoxicated they are. The drugs are not creating the poetry. The poet's mind is creating the poetry. A person doesn't stop being a person just because they took something.

also if it got published they probably still liked it sober

Documenting what is quite possibly the best exchange I have ever seen on this website.

He will not be exiled again

I enjoy all parts of this post. The trans leash, the confusion, the heartfelt display of affection we give to our pets. The biography, the history lesson, and the morality of keeping cats indoors are all bonuses.

Hey thats me again.

Anyway guess whos 18 now!!!

Frank

This post has EVERYTHING...

the student said, "i'm reading a zen buddhist cookbook. with no recipes." and the teacher replied, "ah, dogen's instructions for the cook, written in 1237?" "yeah," said the student, "it's saying not to let rats fall into the rice pot"

letting rats fall into the rice pot violates the buddhist concept of nonviolence, ahimsa. and this is one of the more dauntingly advanced cookbooks i've ever seen

ingredients: 1 grain of dust.

step 1 turn the Wheel of Reality within the grain of dust

the student said, "i'm reading a zen buddhist cookbook. with no recipes." and the teacher replied, "ah, dogen's instructions for the cook, written in 1237?" "yeah," said the student, "it's saying not to let rats fall into the rice pot"

letting rats fall into the rice pot violates the buddhist concept of nonviolence, ahimsa. and this is one of the more dauntingly advanced cookbooks i've ever seen

ingredients: 1 grain of dust.

step 1 turn the Wheel of Reality within the grain of dust

I personally see myself as being judged as not good queer rep, as aroace who dates, "feminine" trans, "emotionless" trope, alien/robot/outsider coded, etc.

This poll is because i am often thinking about characters that are considered bad rep, but I know people in real life are LIKE THAT and identity is messy! In my opnion bad queer rep would be the ones that are shown or touched upon on screen. Idk, just wondering.

Edit: lmao i wrote hood isntead of good and tumblr didnt let me edit

I'm a bi woman married to a man, absolutely not

this is perhaps evil but I can boost my mood in almost any situation by playing a game called "what was my mom doing at this age?" like rn for instance I'm sleepy because I had a 12 hour work day + stayed up late, and my stomach hurts a little from the enormous chimichanga I smashed for dinner, and my head hurts a little bit from the fat margaritas I had with the chimichanga. and it's like hmm, okay, not optimal, but when my mom was this age she had a 2.5 year old to deal with. can you fucking imagine. can't stay in bed decadently bemoaning your overindulgences because there's a goblin in the next room that's utterly dependent on you for food and hygiene and social needs and if you drop the ball you've fucked up a perfectly good person. and I'm pretty normal so shout out to her for keeping it together but god that couldn't be me, I like fucking around way too much.

the thing about being nonbinary is that you really do start to forget that other people have such strict walls around what is and isn’t allowed for genders. i thought we all agreed that we made that up. could you climb out of the cave real quick and feel the sunshine for a minute.

You are using an unsupported browser and things might not work as intended. Please make sure you're using the latest version of Chrome, Firefox, Safari, or Edge.