banking apps will be like “you can’t do this on the app! you must call to speak to a customer service agent” and then you call and while you’re on hold a robot tells you 13 times that instead of calling in you can get faster service on the app

the best episodes of taskmaster are ones that make me have to google greg davies bisexual just to see if anything's changed since the last time i googled greg davies bisexual

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DEADLINE?????????

New post from 9-1-1 celebrating the renewal!! ✨✨

and obviously you find yourself thinking oh i do wish i could get severed to do this one thing. would you actually maybe not. but you do wish you didn't have to undergo medical procedures you do wish you didn't have to do the things that give you anxiety you do wish you didn't have to do tedious tasks that barely even require you to be present for them. it's tempting. that's why the premise works. but the premise is also that somebody has to do it. somebody has to go to the dentist and somebody has to get on that plane and somebody has to write those thank you notes. just like somebody has to clean the house and somebody has to harvest the food you eat and somebody has to make the clothes you wear. you can't eliminate inconvenience you can only delegate it. you can't eliminate suffering you can only delegate it. and always the easiest way to live with this is to see that somebody as less than. less than you less than people. and if that somebody has to wear your body to do it well maybe it's not all that different. they're not a person. you are. it's capitalism all the way down baby

really factual recounting with no embellishments whatsoever

these three scenes in Airplane! come one right after another and together they form the most lethal sequence in cinema history

stuck in a timeloop called i just have to get through this week

it's called the Switch 2 because you Switch 2 a cheaper hobby

we need more masculine clothing designed to show off tits

this was about butch women but im glad u guys are having fun with ur star trek men

every time i write i think about that maya angelou quote where she talks about her editor asking her why she uses semicolons instead of colons and says she has often responded by threatening to never speak to him again

she’s so fucking funny

april fools day is actually the most sensible day of the year because it's the only day on which people will read something on the internet and stop for a second to consider whether or not it's actually true

does anyone remember when buck said 'in love with eddie' on my tv screen. did anyone see that.

buck teasing eddie while they're on facetime and eddie goes "oh you love me" and buck says "WHAT noidon't. what are you talking about. did tommy tell you to say that? did MADDIE tell you to say that??you're straight. and this isn't even your house. and i, hate you." and then he hangs up