Hell yes. Steven Soderbergh, please never stop giving me movies about people in fashionable clothes walking briskly. They can be walking anywhere you want, Steven. Just keep them coming. (This is a real delight — a magnificent ensemble, perfectly staged, JUST twisty enough.)

I understand that people of my generational cohort regard this as a cult classic but honestly… honey, get better cult classics. This is mostly a shoddy, imitative mess, and it only occasionally sparks to life based on the talent assembled in front of the camera (great job, casting department; the rest of the production, please see me after class).

ALL OF THAT SAID: there was a Spanish teacher at our high school named Fern Mayo, and to this day, no one has explained how her name wound up in this film. NAME-WISE IT’S NOT EXACTLY “JOHN SMITH.”

Am I going to be heckled out of town if I say I thought this was kinda mid when judged against the vast spectrum of vampire movies? Don’t get me wrong, there’s plenty to like here, but it doesn’t exactly move nimbly, it mostly plays one note, and when you compare it to something as vibrant and creative as the towering Coppola DRACULA, it doesn’t quite measure up. I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I’m glad this generation has a fucked-up Dracula movie of their very own, but this one did not get my blood pumping.

A very well-executed remix of all the ALIEN elements you’ve seen before. After a certain point, any hope of seeing, hearing, or feeling anything new and surprising goes out the door, and you just have to accept that the bar was only set at “don’t embarrass us.” Adding the half-star is MAYBE too generous — I’m inclined to take it away purely for the obnoxiously self-indulgent classic-line repetition near the climax — but I’ll roll with it.