he just looks so torture-able . like it would be a disservice NOT to torture him.. . he WANTS to be tortured

reblog if it's okay for your mutuals to message you and create an actual friendship, not just interactions

YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YE SY ES

I don’t bite, guys please I wanna talk more about my favorite goobers 😭

its a lie ender bites i can confirm they do/j

SHHHHH- NO

DON’T BELIEVE IN THEIR LIES

I bite 🤚

[Tweet from @/fozmeadows: "human gender and sexuality are very much like animal taxonomy, in that both look structured and simple on the surface, but once you start investigating, it turns out there's actually no such thing as a fish despite the fact that we all know what a fish is, and that's okay"]

As a biologist, that is a fantastic comparison.

We talk about “fish” (which, cladistically, do not exist, there is no monophyletic group of “fish” that simultaneously includes all organisms we understand to be “fish”-like while also excluding, say, humans) because, despite the utter fiction that is fish, it’s still a useful label when we talk about certain features that “fish” tend to have in common.

Gender is absolutely the same way.

Babe wake up new gender dropped, it's got gills

public proposals are so embarrassing if someone tried to propose to me in public I’d walk away

Because we’re gay and love free dessert, mostly. Grifting is my love language

"grifting is my love language" is the greatest thing I've ever heard

We’ve proposed to each other 3 times now. The first time was in a park, with just us. The second time was immediately afterwards, in a restaurant, where the family next to us bought our dinner and left without telling us that’s what they were doing, and the restaurant gave us champagne and chocolate cake. The third time, the restaurant gave us Prosecco. At least one of use legitimately cried on each occasion, so we’re giving the crowd their money’s worth. But yeah, defn grifting.

i enter the shower. hours pass. i emerge from the shower, having mixed all of my soaps and scrubs and lotions and conditioners and shampoos and body washes together in the tub in precise alchemical quantities. i smell like 314 different herbs and spices. my hair will not need washing for the next 500 days. my skin has developed protective chitinous scales. i step out of the tub and immediately slip and fall on a stray puddle of mane 'n tail and sprain my pussy

A WarioWare spoof of Big Bill Hell's I made months ago for a Discord server. I figured now would be appropriate to share it here.

* I don't care what the official stance on it is. What are YOUR personal thoughts?

Research has shown that pleasure affects nutrient absorption. In a 1970s study of Swedish and Thai women, it was found that when the Thai women were eating their own (preferred) cuisine, they absorbed about 50% more iron from the meal than they did from eating the unfamiliar Swedish food. And the same was true in the reverse for the Swedish women. When both groups were split internally and one group given a paste made from the exact same meal and the other was given the meal itself, those eating the paste absorbed 70% less iron than those eating the food in its normal state.

Pleasure affects our metabolic pathways; it’s a facet of the complex gut-brain connection. If you’re eating foods you don’t like because you think it’s healthy, it’s not actually doing your body much good (it’s also unsustainable, we’re pleasure-seeking creatures). Eat food you enjoy, it’s a win-win.

what

no seriously

what?

PLEASURE IS A NECESSARY PART OF HUMAN HEALTH, BOTH PSYCHOLOGICALLY AND PHYSICALLY

this is why you should be eating your chips with salsa and guac instead of beating yourself up for not eating a salad with tomato and avocado (unless you are a salad bitch like me then enjoy both of them!)

here’s a recent systemic review of all the research done on the subject

for those of you wondering if the studies cited above are legit and if so where we can read about them, here’s a link to one of the (more than a dozen!) papers written on the topic of nutrient absorption and how you eat your food:

hey look, additional info!

He was a boy

She was a girl

I was a duckbilled platypus

He was a punk

She did ballet

I have a bill and a beaver tail

He wanted her

She'd never tell

I live mostly on land but I swim as well

All of her friends

Stuck up their nose

I have venom spikes, did you know about those

He was a sk8r boy

She said see you l8r boy

I couldn't care about that stuff

I don't know what it means

I'm just a monotreme

Ornythorincus anatinus

90s anime women were so fucking beauitful god bless. i miss them so much

shes the cutest anime girl ive ever seen and shes in the bg for 2 seconds

lock in

fuck, marry, kill but instead it’s

get them randomly assigned as your lab partner for a whole semester, get trapped with them on a broken elevator for ten hours, and they’re your employee trainer for your new job at McDonalds

the important rule to this version is that no matter who is with you, you HAVE to be stuck in the elevator for the full ten hours. I don’t care if you’re in there with Thor himself. You can’t get out.

new ask game: send three characters and i’ll tell you which i’d rather have

• get randomly assigned as your lab partner for a whole semester,

• get trapped with on a broken elevator for ten hours

• get as my employee trainer for my new job at McDonalds

@thatsillyoneguy @homocidalpotat @elizarivers @raeprise @anotheraccountonthisapp

Please send to me.

PLEASE GUYS CAN WE PLAY THAT ASK GAME?

YES PLEASE

plurality is like a box of chocolates. sometimes you get someone sweet, sometimes you get someone salty and sometimes jeff the killer is there

I call this the create a new problem technique