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Silent Hill 2006
Mostly just kinda boring. Like, I guess this isn't actively bad but I can understand it being disappointing if you're a fan of the games (never played them, so I don't have many expectations here).
There's some nice environmental and atmospheric design going on; turning the fog into ash was a cool touch. But this is still mostly carried by the soundtrack, which is (as far as I could tell) wholly lifted from the games. In-between those needle drops it's…
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Resident Evil 2002
Yeah yeah the characters suck and there's no real ending, but it's still a funny movie. It's campy. I wouldn't put this on first thing in the morning but if I was scrolling through a Netflix-esque catalogue of garbage this would be more appealing to me than most.
I do think it's funny that (from what I can gather) the zombie dogs get fanserviced in later entries in this series. Like they just have to keep putting them in because…
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Drive 2011
IRENE
(Changing the subject)
What do you do?Driver hesitates.
DRIVER
I drive.---»
As a more real review I think this is very carried by its soundtrack. Like, granted, if the movie was totally muted this would still be a competent noir. A pretty slow one, but still like, good. I can see why people say this guy is so cool and just like them for real. This perception doesn't come wholly from memes or anything.
Buuut I also…
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Emilia Pérez 2024
I'm sure everyone has seen the "penis to vaginaaaaa" bit so I'm going to ignore talking about the music (most of which is just "bad")*.
This is kind of a mind numbingly stupid movie. I'm still not entirely sure what the plot of this film was even supposed to be, and the way it chooses to economize the plot it does have is very bizarre. We get a whole club scene with Selena Gomez and her new boyfriend - a…
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